Page 10 of Why Not Me?

Dropping my legs, I move to the side so Brendan can take his turn. As he picks up an ax I start heckling him when he hits the edge of the target. “C’mon, Scott, you can do better than that. Big strong man like you.”

He scowls at me, his eyes laughing as he hands me an ax. “You lucked out. I doubt you’ll hit that bullseye again.”

Licking my lips, I slide my hand up and down the handle a couple of times, taunting him as I back away. With a grin, I turn around, center myself, and throw the ax. Right into the bullseye of the target.

Screaming in excitement, I dance in a circle, wiggling my hips. “Luck my ass.”

Brendan stalks toward me, grabbing my hips and yanking me toward him. His lips crash onto mine, his desperate need for me causes a moan to slip out as I deepen the kiss, our tongues melding together.

“Want to get out of here?” He cups my cheeks, his erection pressing into me as he holds me close.

“We still have time left,” I tease, a small smirk pulling at the corners of my lips.

He wraps his hand in my hair, kissing me again until we’re both breathing heavily, before pressing his forehead to mine. “I don’t care.”

Licking my lips, I take his hand and lead him to the front counter to grab our belongings. We both need this, the closeness that’s been lacking in our relationship for longer than I can identify.

“Let’s go home.” I barely recognize my voice, it’s low and throaty, aroused.

I rest my hand on his thigh the entire drive home, only taking it away to get out of the car. As soon as the car is locked, we meet in front and his lips are on mine, devouring me as we stumble into the building, his hand smacking the button for the elevator before pressing me into the wall.

We fumble our way to our door, kissing and touching like it’s the first time. I don’t actually remember the last time I felt this aroused. Lately it’s felt like intimacy is more of a chore, something to get done and then we can move on with our day. I can tell in the way Brendan is holding me, his arms wrapped around me so tight, that he needs this. He needs this closeness and I haven’t been giving it to him.

Slamming our door shut behind us, I back down the hall leaving a trail of clothes. The way Brendan’s eyes follow me, devouring my every movement, I crave that connection. I need it. I need to forget about anything else except the desire rolling off the man prowling after me. The amount of love in his eyes, it wraps around me in that comforting bubble.

Crawling up the bed, I sprawl out and tease my nipples, watching him as he loses the rest of his clothes and joins me on the bed. He holds himself above me, pressing down to kiss me as a thick “oh fuck” comes out on a deep moan.

Pressing my hand into his chest, I roll him onto his back and wrap my hand around his cock. Positioning myself over him, I sink down and twist my hips, watching how Brendan’s eyes practically roll into the back of his head. I ride him until he slides his hands up my thighs, holds onto my hips and flips us back over. He grins down at me when I growl at him, but as he pins my legs up and pounds into me, I forget to be annoyed.

“Harder. Faster.” My words come out as a whimpering beg, the deeper angle building me up until my body shudders with the magnitude of my release. I can’t remember the last time I came so hard.

Our bodies are slick with sweat by the time he collapses next to me. Our chests rise and fall with our quickened breaths. Reaching over, I link my fingers with Brendan’s, the sharp inhale of his breath sending pain through my chest. The fact that he’s surprised any time I make a simple affectionate gesture speaks volumes about how little I’ve been showing him I care. Brendan has always been a physical guy, he thrives on physical intimacy. And not just sex, he loves everything, right down to something as simple as me running my fingers through his hair.

He squeezes my hand, rolling toward me and stroking my cheek. This is how we fall asleep, smiling at each other while holding hands.

Brendan is fast asleep next to me, his even breathing a soothing sound in the darkness. Yet sleep eludes me and I can’t pinpoint why. Opening my eyes, I watch him sleep. His face is smooth, worry free. Instead of the usual comfort I get from being close to Brendan I feel—unsettled. Rolling to face away from him, I close my eyes and try to relax, try to find my calm.

This evening was some of the most fun Brendan and I have had in a long time. We haven’t made time for a date night like that in months. I didn’t realize how much I missed actually dating him until now. It’s easy when you’ve been together for as long as we have to fall into a routine and take each other for granted.

Sometimes I forget how he made me laugh when no one else could. How he brought me out of my endless cycle of hurt, self-loathing, and regret at sacrificing my morals for someone who ended up breaking my heart.

We met less than a month after Landon had ended things and, despite my distance, he managed to weasel his way into my circle of friends a few months later. Less than a year later we went on our first date—a date that still hasn’t been surpassed. He surprised me with zip lining in the mountains, something I’d always wanted to do.

It was his sense of humor, his ability to make me smile, and his adventurous spirit that made me fall in love with him. It’s his kind heart and unwavering devotion that has kept us going for six years.

Brendan mumbles in his sleep, his still form relaxed. It’s unusual for me to experience any form of insomnia, typically I fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow, but for whatever reason I just can’t find that blissful moment when sleep pulls me in.

Flipping onto my back, I sigh in frustration. Reaching across to my nightstand, I grab my phone from the charger and tiptoe out of the room. Flipping on the TV, I turn the volume down and then check my phone.

Landon:Thank you for giving me the chance to explain what happened.

Glancing at the time, I notice he texted me ten minutes ago.

Tucking my legs into my chest, I bite my lower lip as I type, my heart fluttering.

Me:I think I needed to know what happened as much as you needed to tell me. Closure and all that.

Landon:I hope I didn’t wake you.

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