Page 68 of Vicious Hearts

“You can't fucking fix me, okay?” he says. “I'm all or nothing, and this is the nothing phase. So as you said—it's been wild."

My chest burns. Is this what it feels like to have your heart shattered like bone china?

I hate the sneer in his voice, but Idespisethe self-loathing that seeps into his words. He's trying to make me fight him, hoping it'll be easier for us both if we can swap love for hate.

I refuse to stoop to that. Like when I lost my mom and dad, I would ratherfeelthe pain. It means the love was real.

"I still believe there's more to you," I say. "I hope we can at least be friends. We've been through a lot together."

The silence is brief but leaden.

"Yeah," he says, without sincerity. "What will you do now?"

"I might stay here. I might go home. Haven't decided."

The silence is weighted with unsaid words.

There is no ‘us’ anymore. That ship hasn’t just sailed—it’s wrecked, smashed to pieces because neither of us were willing to be the other’s guiding light.

I hear Ben's name being called in the background.

"Gotta go," he says.

He hangs up.

I stand in the garden for a while, watching as the sun fades. The moon rises in an indigo sky.

Graham Fisher will never kill again. There's no one to mourn a twisted man, scrubbed out of existence by his own hand, unable to bear the weight of his sickness. Not only is The Dollmaker's reign of terror over, but Farraday will go free.

And I'm safe.I can return to my old life and carry on as though none of it ever happened.

I start to cry.

* * *

When I go inside, my cheeks are stiff with dried tears.

Luna is already in bed. Ali has set up a room for Lois to stay the night, and Jamie is sleeping in Luna's old travel cot. Hillard called Lois and brought her up to speed, and I'm grateful because the thought of talking about it anymore leaves me numb.

The news is on the television in the lounge. There's pizza and beer on the table, but no one seems to have much appetite.

Aerial footage of shipping containers, with cop cars and officers standing around. One container is taped off.

"What did Hillard say?" I ask, sitting down beside Lois.

"He apologized for what he did to Simon," she says. "It was a good talk. It's a mess down there, files and photos and all sorts, but apparently, some things have been found at this Fisher guy's house. Some weird things. He didn't elaborate."

The shot zooms in, and I see Ben standing beside Hillard.

My cell phone trills. I snatch it up, hoping it's Ben, but it isn't.

"Moira?" I say, heading into the kitchen. "Sorry, the television was on. Have you heard?"

"Yes, I just saw it." Moira sounds rattled. "The press are loving it. The Dollmaker was still at large and a trustee ofmycharity? No one's released any details yet, but Oliver told me a few things."

Holy shit.I'd totally forgotten about Oliver. The poor guy leaped to my aid without hesitation and got injured in the process, and I put him out of mymind?

"Oh hell, Moira. I knew Graham attacked him, but a lot was going on at the time, and I didn't know how bad he was hurt. Is he gonna be okay?"