Page 99 of Knot your Good Girl

Chapter 30

Holly

Adelicatecaressonmy lower back makes me turn abruptly, my heart sinks when I catch sight of a man passing by.

He smiles. He has beautiful sapphire blue eyes and a kindly face. I have a hunch that he’s a secure beta, and I should listen to my mom when she told me to look for a safer option and forget about Aiden.

Why can’t I forget about him? He’s probably forgotten about me.

In the dimly lit afternoon, I see the silhouette of the tower enveloping the city while the boats travel the winding core of Paris along the Seine River.

“Is this what you expected?” My fingers bump against the pendant hanging from my neck. The weight of it is heavy, but not nearly as heavy as the burden I’ve carried of my sister’s unfulfilled dream of traveling the world.

It’s not what I expected.

I stroll along the walkway that circles the second level of the Eiffel Tower. Glancing at the Parisian skyline with its iconic landmarks spreading out before me.

“You know he wanted you all that time.” I squeeze the box around my neck as I talk to her.

I believed this journey would aid in my recovery from both him and her. That it would give me the strength to say‘fuck it’to the world.

To say,‘Fuck you Aiden, I don’t need you either.’

My cell emits a ping. Another message from my mom. Each one begging me to go home. I take comfort in her deep concern for my well-being. That finally, I’m the one being worried about.

“It was always you,” I whisper as I think about Mom and Dad and how they treated their twins so differently.

“Don’t be selfish, Holly. Your sister is sick.”

“We can’t take you there, Holly. Ivy has guitar practise.”God, did she need that practice?

“Let Ivy play with your toys, Holly.”

“Leave Ivy alone, Holly.”

Ivy. Ivy. Ivy.

Yet, I loved her.

I idolized her.

She never treated me differently. Only our parents did that.

I can’t help but feel that my sister’s spirit is with me on this last journey. I feel her and I know it’s time to set her free and discover me within the remaining fragments.

This journey changes everything.

After this I’m alone.

The ashes inside my pendant are the only real connection I have left of her, and I’m scared that once I give her the dream she made me promise her, I won’t have anything but her memory left to remember.

“You were always the favorite. I was always second best.” I sink my teeth into my bottom lip while tightly clutching the small metal box. Anything to stop me from crying in front of all these people. Not that anyone is looking; I’m just another person on this iconic landmark. “And finally, I thought someone wanted me...” I suck back a sob. “But Aiden was obsessed with you, too.”

I can’t believe he set out to get revenge on me, not knowing. Still not knowing, it was never me.

As Ivy neared her end, I found out she had an account on OmegaFans. Not that she told me. I found it out one night when I borrowed her laptop. Her secret life was quite the eye opener.

I was going to take over my sister’s OmegaFans account after she died. I wanted to be like her. I wanted to be the bad girl. The one people thought of first.

---