Page 62 of Before Forever

“Not by a long shot,” I assured him. “Quite the opposite, actually. So it’s just goodnight for now, then.”

“Just for now,” he whispered, kissing me gently.

As he walked out the front door, I got the strange feeling again, like someone was watching me. I almost asked Derek to stay because the sensation was starting to give me the creeps.

“You okay?” he asked, noticing how I was chewing my bottom lip again.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I forced myself to say with a reassuring smile. “Get home to Em, and please tell her again I said ‘bravo!’ and great job.”

He kissed me one last time before turning to leave. I locked the door and went upstairs to take a shower. I was reeling from another amazing time with him, so much so that I hated to wash his scent off of my skin. The night had proved at least one thing to be certain I was falling, hard and deep. And not just for Derek, but for Em too and the whole town.

If I stood any chance at getting some sleep that night, I needed something to wind down and take the edge off. I slipped into some sweats and dried my hair off with a towel, then went down to the kitchen to pour a glass of wine. I stood in the kitchen for a while, sipping from my glass as I glanced around the lake house. I couldn’t wait to see how it looked when it was finished, and secretly I was thrilled by the prospect of maybe calling it my new home.

I knew I couldn’t be too sure of anything just yet. This was all so new, and if life had taught me anything recently, it was that you couldn’t predict what would happen. But my heart wanted to belong here in this new life so badly, I was willing to take the gamble on hoping that would come true.

I drew my glass to my lips for another drink, but jumped, nearly spilling it all, at the sound of the front porch creaking. I would have tried to write it off again, but this time it was followed by the sound of the screen door opening. My heart was pounding, and I was starting to regret not asking Derek to stick around longer.

I sat my glass down on the counter and crept closer to the door, trying to avoid the windows. The closer I got, the more obvious it became that someone was standing right outside. Just standing there with the screen door open, not knocking or saying anything. That couldn’t have been good.

I slowly peeked through the hole to see if I could spot them. My heavy-beating heart stopped cold at the face I saw just outside.Evan.

My hands were shaking as I unlocked the door and flung it open. “Evan! What the hell are you doing here!?”

It seemed so strange to see him standing there. My two worlds were colliding, the life I left behind and the new one I had accidentally stumbled into.

“You weren’t texting me back. I was worried,” he said. His voice was deep and grim, and he looked terrible, like he had eaten a bad piece of meat. He was sweaty, and his skin was a pale, sickly color.

“So you flew all the way to Silver Point!? I didn’t need you to do that! It’s not your job to worry about me anymore. You could have just asked Katie if I was okay.”

“So youareignoring me?” he scoffed in disbelief.

“I have no reason to talk to you,” I shot back firmly.

“Who was that guy? I spotted you with him the moment I got into town. I was driving by a school, and there you were…withhim. I couldn’t believe it. And you brought him back here with you?” His voice was full of pain now.

“Were you following me?” I rasped, narrowing my eyes. It made sense now, but it didn’t make it any less creepy. The noises I had been hearing all night, and the feeling of someone was watching me. It was him the whole time. “Yeah, I did bring him back here with me. What did you expect? I had every right to move on. You cheated on me, remember? We’re done, Evan. That’s why I stopped answering your calls and texts. Now go back home.”

“What are you going to do?Stay here?” he laughed. “Get real, Mel. This place isn’t for you. Thatguyisn’t for you. Look, I know you’re going through a lot with your mom and everything right now. And I wasn’t there for you like I should have been.”

“No, you sure weren’t,” I huffed. “You were too busy with Natasha.”

“But that doesn’t mean you can just run away from your whole life and pretend you fit into a place like this!”

I swallowed hard, and my face twisted up with uncertainty. I didn’t want to believe him, and most of me didn’t want him to be standing there talking to me at all. But there was still some small part of me that remembered how much I used to love him. That part of me spent weeks crying and missing him, mourning the future we could have had, that he threw away. It was the same part of me that missed New York and still thought of it as home. I hadn’t thought about any of that in days, but a person can’t change every cell of their being overnight.

And change was scary enough that it was impossible not to have doubts, to question yourself at every turn. Was he right? Was I crazy to think I belonged with Derek in Silver Point?

“Why not?” I sighed, my voice cracking. “You ran away from us first, remember? Right into her arms while I waited for you at home, pining over you and wondering when you were going to propose to me.”

“You never waited for me at home, Melody,” he said with a cynical laugh. “You were always at the office. You were always busy.”

“Maybe that’s exactly what I’m trying to change,” I defended, crossing my arms.

“But I don’t want you to change that part of you,” he insisted, stepping closer. I inched back into the house, keeping my distance. “I was wrong to think I did or to hold it against you. You work hard, and you’re good at what you do. That’s what I love about you. That’s what everyone loves about you.”

I let his words sink in and suddenly found it hard to believe that a month or two ago, that kind of statement would have melted me. It would have made me feel better about myself and like everything would be okay.

Now it just felt so empty and useless.

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