Page 55 of Before Forever

I tried to fight off the tears suddenly welling up in my eyes. “Yes, sadly. She is.”

“Dinner’s almost ready,” Derek called out from the kitchen, snapping us out of the moment.

I felt closer to Em already, now that we had pointed out the horrible thing we had in common. Sometimes the only good thing about sadness is that it could connect you to other people. Apparently, an age difference didn’t change that.

We carefully laid out the placemats, plates, napkins, and silverware. I helped Em fill up a glass of sweet tea for everyone and then offered to help Derek bring out the food. But he insisted I sit.

“You’re a guest,” he argued. “You’re not supposed to be helping.”

As comforting as their home felt, the truth was I still felt out of my depth. I wanted to help, so I’d know what to do with myself. Everything was going well so far, but I worried I was hanging by a thread and that at any moment, I’d do something to mess everything up.

But I waited at the table with Em as instructed, waiting for Derek to bring out the dish he had been slaving over.

“If it tastes anywhere near as good as it smells, you’ve done a great job,” I told him when he finally emerged from the kitchen.

“I’m not much of a cook, but I get by. I thought we’d do something different from our usual tonight. Stuffed chicken with green beans and cornbread.”

“No green beans for me, please,” Em stated plainly.

“We’ve talked about this. You know you have to have at least a little green with every dinner. Or else no ice cream for dessert.”

She slumped in her chair with a grumpy frown but didn’t argue.

Derek served a plate to each of us, and it all looked wonderful. But just as I started to cut into the chicken, I stopped and stared out the window.

“Something wrong?” Derek asked. “I’ve seen you eat chicken before.”

“Yeah. Just usually not with…,” I pointed to the window, then leaned in and whispered so as not to upset Em. “Not with a live one watching me while I do it. I feel bad.”

Derek laughed. “Those chickens are dumb as rocks. If they’re staring at you at all, it’s probably because they want what you’re eating. And they would eat it too. So if they’d chow down on their own kind without feeling guilty, I think you’re just fine.”

“It’s not nice to call people ‘dumb’, Daddy,” Em scolded.

“You are exactly right. My apologies. It won’t happen again.” He humbly held his hands in the air, apologizing with such sincerity.

While we ate, Em told me all about her school, her friends, and a play she would be in soon. She talked about how hard she was working on learning her lines, all the songs, and the dances.

“I’m sure you’re going to be the best Bo Peep this town has ever seen!” I assured her.

“You’ll come to see me, won’t you? In the play?” she asked.

I froze up and looked over to Derek. I couldn’t lie. I really wanted to see her in the play. I imagined it would be one of the cutest things I’d ever seen in my whole life. But I didn’t want to overstep. I wasn’t sure what the rules were.

“Maybe,” Derek answered for me. “We’ll have to see as it gets closer to time for your big debut on the stage. How about that ice cream?”

That was enough to put the play, me, and whatever role I was supposed to serve in her life out of her mind entirely.

After dinner, we played a kid's version of Scrabble, which was supposed to help Em get better at spelling and reading. It was more fun than I expected it to be. So much so that I was even a little disappointed when Derek said it was her bedtime.

We both let out a big, “Awwwwww!” in protest, but then I remembered I should probably act like an adult and side with Derek.

“Your dad is right,” I said, correcting myself. “Little Bo Peep has to get her rest so she can be in good shape to get ready for the play.”

Em nodded solemnly in excitement then followed Derek down the hall to her room. He flashed me a smile over his shoulder as they went.

I let out a big exhale of relief. This was going well, right? I hadn’t done anything to mess it up yet, as far as I could tell. I liked Em, and she seemed to like me. Was that really all there was to this?

I hung back while Derek helped her wash up, get on her pajamas, and brush her teeth. While they were in the bathroom, I wandered around the living room and studied their family belongings. There were photos displayed across the fireplace mantle. When I took a closer look, I realized almost every one featured Rebecca.

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