Page 36 of Second Chance Christmas

It felt good just being near him. But an element of self-preservation had her pulling away, because no matter how good she felt now, he was leaving, and she had to accept that.

“Cass—,” her name on his lips was a plea and an acknowledgement of a miracle. She lifted her hand to his shoulder, then dropped it to his heart. The steady, dependable beating made her own throb in response.

“In another life, in another place,” she said, wistfully. “I have no doubt we’d be living the fairytale we always thought would be ours.”

“But we still could,” he said, softly, so softly that at first she didn’t hear, and didn’t understand.

“You’re leaving today,” she reminded him.

“No, I’m not.”

She dropped her hands, stared at him, her brain not working properly.

“I’ve quit.”

“Leo—,” her eyes were round. It was the last thing she’d expected him to say. She shook her head, nothing making sense. “I’m—sorry—what do you mean?”

“I’ve achieved more professionally than I ever thought I would. I have more money than I know what to do with. What I don’t have is the life that matters most to me with the woman I love.” Her breath caught. Leo rushed on. “I’m not asking you to love me back, Cass. I always knew that wasn’t likely, maybe not even possible after how we broke up. But I’m at least going to be here for you, for as long as you need me. For as long as you want me, in whatever capacity you’ll have me. I just want to be here for you, and Audrey. If you’ll let me.”

How could she not cry in response to that?

And not a picture-perfect, tear rolling slowly down one cheek kind of cry, but in an ugly, all-encompassing, body-wracking way? She lost any hold of her emotions in response to his words, so his arms around her waist became a lifeline.

“I love you,” he said, simply. “And I want to be right here, with you. Is that okay?”

She shook her head. Not because she was refusing him, but because it was so much more than she could have hoped for. Being free of Grant was a Christmas miracle, this was the whole ball game.

“I’m not trying to pressure you. I know you’ve been through a lot. I am not asking you for anything in return, Cass, I just want to be in your life. I have missed you so much. I have spent six years missing you, I don’t want to go another day if I can avoid it…”

“You don’t understand,” she groaned, pressing a hand to his chest, sobbing. “I don’t feel pressured, I feel…I feel as though Father Christmas looked inside my heart and saw everything I wanted most and brought it to me wrapped up in a perfect red bow,” she said, and then she laughed. “My goodness, do you have any idea what you’re saying?”

“That I love you?”

“That you love me,” she repeated. “It’s all I’ve wanted to hear, all I’ve needed to hear.” She dropped her forehead to his chest. “I love you so much. I never stopped loving you. Maybe if I’d loved you less, it wouldn’t have hurt me the way it did…”

“I have regretted—,”

“I know. I know. I have regretted too. I wish I’d let you explain. I wish I’d listened to you. I wish I hadn’t tried to get back at you by—,”

“It’s okay. It’s okay. All that matters is our future,” he said, capturing her face and kissing her. She sobbed again.

“But Leo?” She said, into his mouth. He pulled away, studying her with such obvious love that her heart fluttered. “I don’t want you to quit. I never wanted that. I’m so proud of you. I have watched your success from afar and I have known, and understood, how much football means to you. There is no way I could live with myself if you gave that up for me.”

“Not for you. For us, for Audrey. For our family.”

She sobbed.

“We’re a family no matter what. Keep playing. We’ll come with you when we can, we’ll be here when we can’t.”

“Would you—,”

She waited, watching him.

“I live in London. I know you’ve moved back in with your dad, but would you consider, I mean, when you’re ready,” he let out a frustrated sigh then laughed. “What I am trying, very badly, to ask, is if you’ll consider living with me. When you’re ready. I don’t want to rush you, but having lost you once before, I just want to grab hold of you, and Audrey, with both hands from this moment on. When you’re ready.”

“I’m ready,” she laughed, but shook her head, pressing a hand to his chest. “But Audrey is another matter. I want to take it slowly for her. I need to make sure she’s okay with this. If it were just about you and me, I would move in a heartbeat.”

“I get it, and I love you for it. You’re such a wonderful mum. I always knew you would be.”

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