Page 33 of Feverburn

“What’s a vulva? I don’t even know what that is!”Boyd whined.

Bear and I both sighed in unison. That was too easy. I ran my hand over my chin,“Oh man, we know. We know.”I glanced at Rosie, who was now waltzing with Kaylee to a song by Journey.“Listen, stop watching women dancing if you’re not dancing. Stopcheatingon your damn wife. Does she know you’re here?”

“Our marriage is none of your business.”

Ignoring his statement, I continued,“Viv mentioned you were snooping around her shop for a book about coffee.”

Bear snorted.“So you think if you know about lattes, it will make up for stalking half the women working there? Dude, that’s sopathetic. The last thing they need is youlurkingout by the dumpsters, threatening to write them a ticket so that you get their number.”

Boyd opened his mouth to argue, but I clapped my hand against his back, leaning over to mutter in his ear while standing up.“I’m here to let you know that if you bother any of the women at Silver Springs in any way, I’ll be shoving your nuts down your throat.”

Bear rumbled with amusement next to us. Boyd turned to look up at me. His beady eyes were glossy from hischeapbeer.“Is that how you speak to an officer of the law?”

“No, it’s how I speak to a piece of shit—who’s also a piece of shit with a badge. Shocking, I know. Now get fucked.”

Bear got up with me, returning to his regular seat with our friends as I walked closer to the women. Rosie did adoubletake.“Carsuuuun?”she slurred.

“Hey, Ro, it’s time to go.”

They both looked at each other from where they embraced and parroted the unintentional rhyme in unison,“Ro time to go!”They held each other’s waists while arching back in laughter, swaying, and almost falling over. I stepped closer to pull them apart likewetnoodles.

“Ohmygawsh Carsuuun you,”Kaylee hiccupped,“you look sooooo much,”she hiccupped again,“like Har-ley.”Her Southern accent was popping out, making it even funnier.

“Yeah, it’s almost like we’re brothers.”

Rosie loved that one. She snorted and gave me a side hug. She was an adorable drunk.

Kaylee went on,“Do-do you, do you have a big ‘ol dick like your bruthaaar?”She erupted in a cackle and fell into me. I caught her and propped her back up.

Rosie gasped and swatted at Kaylee.“You caaan’t jus ask tha!”She bashfully looked at my groin and then at my face with a giggle.

With an arm around each woman, I stepped closer to the door, trying not to scare them away from leaving, knowing they’d get skittish if I were too obvious.

Harley opened the door, spotting us immediately. Kaylee’s hollering twang filled the tavern with a gleeful ring.“HAR-LEEEEY! BIG DICK DADDYYYY!”

Bear’s laughter boomed behind me. Harley caught Kaylee as she launched herself at him. Without pretense, he lifted her over his shoulder like a gunnysack, casually grabbing a handful of her ass so her short sundress wouldn’t move. Her arms swung down his back in resignation.

“Did you give her tequila?”he asked in horror, his face making me finally crack.

“I wasn’t here for most of it, but the tab said she had three shots of it and something called a Slippery Nipple.”I swayed with Rosie falling into me after trying to reach Kaylee.

“Dooon’t lift me. I’ll puke,”she warned. I wrapped both arms around her to keep her still, causing her to nuzzle into my pec as I put on mybeststoic face.

Harley sucked in a worried breath. He was a man on duty.“You know in the movieGremlins, how the little creatures can’t getwetafter midnight, or else they multiply and cause havoc?”

“Yeah,”I answered, puzzled.

“That’s Kaylee with tequila. She can never have it. Especially after midnight.”He turned to yell back at her from where she draped over his shoulder.“Huh, woman?”

“Youuuuuh can gih mewetafter midnighhh,”Kaylee garbled behind him.

“The only thing you’re getting tonight is a grilled cheese sandwich when we get home,”Harley said with a subtle squeeze of her ass.“Do you mind getting her back safe?”he asked, looking at Rosie falling asleep. I nodded, carefully urging her to walk.

The women mumbled something to each other while we exited the tavern in separate directions. I strolled with Rosie, wrapping one arm around her waist while she leaned into me in drunken silence.

“Are you okay?”I asked.

“Yeah, I’m liiike, so so fine.”She snorted at herself, then started singing,“So sweet, so fine, so nice!”It was a line from a Greta song. She tried to sing more of it but got distracted when she looked up at me with a dopey smile.“I haaaven’t seen you. Handsome.”She tried to reach for my face but slapped it instead.

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