Page 77 of Catalyst

As I walk to the door, Junior pops out of nowhere like an unwanted jack-in-the-box to stand in my way. I can’t help flinching in surprise, which he revels in.

“I sort of hope you don’t do what you’re told. I’d love to have some more alone time with you.” Junior runs a finger from my shoulder, down my arm, and I step out of reach.

I don’t say a word and wait for him to open the door. Since I’m not giving him what he wants, he finally opens the door, and I speed walk down the hallway toward the elevator. I force myself not to look over my shoulder, keeping my eyes glued to the silver doors in front of me. God, how could I have been so stupid? The texts I’ve been getting were never from Linda. They were from Clifford, and now I’m in the worst position I’ve ever been in. What am I supposed to do now?

I will not convince Adam to work with Legends. They’re a shitty company to begin with, and Clifford Byrnes should not be rewarded for this type of behavior.

But there’s no way I can tell Adam what happened tonight. Even though none of their evidence is true, he will be forced to believe what he sees. There’s no other way this can go.

Which leaves me stuck between a rock and a hard place.

CHAPTER36

Adam

Another quiet Mondaymorning rolls around, only this time, I’m feeling like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Ellie and I still have some things we need to work through, but with the news articles no longer being a threat, I plan on giving everything I have to win her back.

She’s it for me. That’s the bottom line. No one else has given me the space to be my true and authentic self like Ellie has. She’s the epitome of class and, at the same time, doesn’t take life too seriously. I admire her more than I can even say.

When I get to the office, I write Ellie a quote about happiness on one of her rainbow-colored sticky notes and place it on her desk. I’ve started to enjoy writing these for her and understand why she was willing to do it for me every day. It brings me joy to do these little things for her, and if she forgives me, I’ll do my best to find more ways I can bring a smile to her face.

Once I’m back in my office, I busy myself with emails and mundane tasks until I hear the telltale signs of life outside. Lights turn on, and papers begin to shuffle as everyone catches up from the weekend.

Ellie still isn’t here yet, and I’m a little surprised. Our regular Monday meeting is supposed to start soon. Where could she be?

As the minutes tick by, my nerves begin to sharpen. In all the time she’s been here, she’s never been late to work. Could something have happened to her on the way in? What if she got into an accident? I wouldn’t be the person the authorities would call first. Actually, I’d probably be the last, since everyone only knows me as her employer.

Just as my panic is about to reach critical levels, our connecting door opens, and she walks in. Immediately, I know something is off. She’s normally perfectly put together, but today, it looks as if she’s thrown on clothes at the last minute, not caring if they look good. Her hair is a mess on top of her head, and she’s wearing her glasses.

She glances at me with bloodshot eyes, and I know that whatever is about to happen is going to destroy me. With a deep breath, I rebuild all the walls I’d begun to take down. Brick by brick, I guard my heart to prepare myself for whatever this is.

I sit down in my normal chair while Ellie perches on the edge of the couch. After a long stretch of silence, she lays down a piece of paper on the coffee table. “I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me over these past few months, but I can’t stay here any longer. I think it would be best if we…” She swallows, and I clench my jaw. “If we make a clean break here. I talked with Tessa this morning, and she’s going to help you find someone to fill in until she’s able to return. It’s only a couple more months, so you won’t have to deal with a new person for long.”

I remain silent. I couldn’t get a word past the lump in my throat, even if I wanted to. I should’ve seen this coming. Why would she forgive me for tearing her down the way I did? I’ve just become another disappointment in the very long line of them in her life. What else should I have expected?

I swallow twice before I’m able to form words. “It was good to work with you, Ellie. I’ll release you from the contract early so you won’t get in trouble with the temp agency.”

I stand from the chair and turn back to my desk, effectively dismissing her. It’s an asshole move—even my words were harsh—but if I let any emotion crack through the surface, I won’t recover. I’ll be a pathetic puddle of a man, wilted on the floor.

That’s not to say I won’t do that once I get home, but it’s nine a.m. on a Monday. I don’t have time for a breakdown right now.

I stare down at my desk, pretending to flip through files while keeping my back to Ellie. I can’t look at her. I refuse to have my last memory of her be her walking out of my life.

So, I wait until the door clicks shut and her presence no longer fills my office. Only then do I fall into a chair and press my fist into my mouth. I give myself one minute to let the heartbreak consume me. It floods my system, exploding in my chest until it feels as if I’ll never feel anything else again.

Fuck, I have to shut this down. It’s time to fall back on my legendary control to get through this.

* * *

“Adam?”

I startle, my gaze pinging around the room to find four sets of eyes staring at me. “Apologies. What was the question?”

Matthew looks at me as if I’ve lost the plot, and, to some degree, I think I have. Zoning out during a meeting isn’t me. I don’t lose focus. I don’t forget where I am and need someone to remind me what we’re talking about. It’s been like this for three days. Three days of expecting a bubbly blonde to brighten my day and three days of searing disappointment when I remember she’s not coming back.

Numb. I’ve shut down every emotion I have since Ellie walked out of my office. I haven’t talked to Tessa, even though she’s called several times. To anyone who’s asked, I’ve told them Ellie is out sick. Getting my mouth around the wordsshe’s gonehasn’t been possible, so I’ve lied instead.

There’s a part of me that wonders if I lie enough times, maybe it’ll become true. I’ve been doing my best to squash that part like a bug. She’s not coming back. No matter how much I want her to.