Page 32 of Under the Christmas Tree

Now, though, Maggie looked broken.

“I’m so sorry,” Katie said, feeling worse than she could ever describe.

“Yoo-hoo! Katie, Maggie, over here,” came that frustratingly familiar voice again.

Katie turned on her heel, her stomach suddenly swirling in a much less pleasant way.

She loved her mom, she really did, but this couldn’t go on. Katie had specifically called Maggie to meet her on her short break because her mom hadn’t given her a second alone since she’d arrived. How was it possible that she was here too?

“There you are,” her mom said as she stopped in front of them, beaming and entirely missing the suddenly sour air. “Fancy running into you two here.”

Katie narrowed her eyes. Those two statements didn’t belong together. “Mom, what are you doing here?”

“I came for a hot cocoa.” She gestured airily to the cups Katie and Maggie were holding and over to the stall they’d gotten them from.

“Why here? There are loads of places to get them from.”

Her mom laughed. “Well, you work right here, so I thought I might be lucky enough to catch you.”

Katie couldn’t do this. Something painful twisted in her stomach.

She knew her mom had this vision of the family together for Christmas, but Katie visited when she could. She had a job and a life. She wasn’t a little kid who needed coddling, and this whole thing was starting to feel like she was being stalked by her mom. How had she known almost exactly when Katie would take her break?Katiehadn’t even known that when she left her apartment.

Maggie sighed heavily, turning slightly. It was the best attempt she had at giving them any privacy. She smiled a heartbroken smile at Katie. “Maybe we’re not meant to have this conversation.” She shrugged sadly. “Maybe we can try again next year.”

Katie’s heart pounded, the sound bouncing painfully around her head. Maggie looked defeated. Katie couldn’t blame her. Three interruptions. Two of them from her mom. Katie’s break almost over, and no privacy in sight.

“Do you want…” Maggie trailed off, but Katie knew she was asking whether to stay for the conversation Katie now had to have.

She shook her head sadly. “I’ll text you later. I only have a couple of minutes anyway.”

Maggie held her gaze for a minute too long before she looked away and nodded. “I’m here for whatever you need.” She turned to look at Katie’s mom. “Merry Christmas, Irene.”

It was probably the worst holiday greeting Katie had ever heard Maggie give, and it brought reality crashing down around her. Maggie was heartbroken that they kept getting interrupted. The thing she wanted to tell Katie had to be good. Katie couldn’t have been imagining it.

And now, she thought the universe was sending them a sign they shouldn’t talk about it. Katie was hit with a wave of nausea as it occurred to her that Maggie might be taking it as a sign that they weren’t meant to be together after all…

No. They’d been through so much. Katie loved her so much, and if Maggie felt even a fraction of the same thing, she wasn’t going to give up, right?

It was worse than getting coal for Christmas. This was almost getting everything you’d ever wanted in life, only to have it whipped away at the last second, left hanging in the balance as to whether you’d ever get the chance again.

Katie looked back at her mom as Maggie walked away.

She clasped her gloved hands together in front of her chest, smiling almost conspiratorially at her daughter. “Ah, well, now I get you all to myself for a bit.”

Katie took a deep breath, fighting against the wave of emotion pushing her to chase after Maggie. She’d messed up by letting her mom invade their time. She’d messed up by not having clearer boundaries with her mom. She’d messed up by not refusing to spend every second she had out of work with her mom, and by not taking the time she needed to go see Maggie. She’d messed up. She had to make it right if she wanted the life she needed, the one where she might get to love Maggie with everything she had.

“Mom,” she said, her voice serious and measured.

“Yes, darling?” She turned towards the hot cocoa stall. “Let’s walk and talk.”

“No,” Katie said, surprising herself a little. She was so good at being firm when she needed to at work, but this was how her mom won. She could refuse to go home because she had to work, but then she’d just go along with things when they were together. And that needed to stop. “Mom, I need you to go home.”

She stared at Katie, clearly shocked. “What?”

“I’m sorry, I really am, but I need you to go home. I need you to go back to your life and let me live mine.” Katie hated every second of it. She felt guilty and ungrateful. But she also knew they had to do things like this.

“You don’t want to see your own mother for Christmas?”

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