Page 112 of The Blackened Blade

That wouldn’t be happening, and not just because of the little showdown a moment ago.

I had promised myself I wouldn’t sing for anyone ever again. Onlyhim.

My voice wasonlyfor him.

“Ms. Bane,” Calls Mrs. Fleur, “You’re first and–”

“I won't be singing.” I shake my head, ignoring everything and everyone else as I meet her furrowed gaze.

“Don’t be silly, Ms. Bane. It’s worth forty percent of your overall grade. You–”

“No.” I cut her off, my tone much colder than I had intended.

She flinches, before fixing herself quickly, shirking it off as her regular smile turns into a frown, disappointment etched into her features.

“You could fail, Ms. Bane. Are you sure about this?”

I give her a curt nod, but try to soften my hardened features. I didn’t want to take my emotions out on the wrong person, she had nothing to do with the ache building in my chest or the lump in my throat trying to choke me.

“Fine.” Her shoulders sag slightly as she bites her bottom lip, clearly seeing this isn’t a battle she’ll win right now. “But come to me after your next class, so we can discuss this further.” She gives me her best ‘serious look’, but it instead appears more comedic and like a child trying to scold another child. “I won't take no for an answer.”

I nod again. I would just have to be very clear about my decision. I wouldn’t sing for anyone, especially the people in this school.

She sighs and calls the next person up to sing.

I wasn’t trying to be difficult, and I actually quite liked her as a teacher. She wasn’t patronising or boring and didn’t seem to listen or care about the rumours going around.

As far as teaching went, other than being late and a little unorganised at times, she was quite good.

But singing in front of other people, and specificallythese people…I wouldn’t.

It reminded me too much ofhimand of my past life. And the time we spent together singing was ours and ours alone.

He had taught me how to sing,properlysing; how to pour every drop of pain and emotion I felt into each lyrical word. It was our escape, our freedom and something just for him and me. It was our way of pulling through the harder days in the Facility together. It was how we would communicate with each other and escape to our own world away from it all here and be free…when we were anything but.

He was the reason I sang; the melody to my words, the soul and heart of my songs, and the reason I survived so long in that hell hole…My beautifully lost siren,Zrael.

CHAPTER 30

Iwas on autopilot for the next class. Thankfully Gadriel had kept it simple in his Defence lesson with some light obstacle work and a quick jog.

But even in my dazed state, I could feel his gaze flickering toward me throughout the lesson. I think he wanted to talk to me when we finished, but I grabbed my stuff, rambling on about meeting Mrs. Fleur and headed quickly to her class.

I didn’t want to talk to anyone, not with how I felt right now. And this wasn’t a ‘spill your emotions and feel better’kind of feeling. Nothing could stop the ache trying to consume me right now.

And I couldn’t rid myself of the thoughts of Zrael. It had been a battle just getting through class. Every second seemed longer, every breath like it was catching in my throat. And as much as I tried to push the memories down, they now seemed to be overflowing in me; wanting to pour out and drag every painful thought and emotion with them.

I had tried to keep busy and not think of him too much. But reality has a cruel way of hitting you. It waits for just the right moment to strike and break you down when you least expect it.

I make it to the music room and look around the class. Mrs. Fleur wasn't here.

I had hoped she would at least be on time for this, but I should have known better with her track record.

I just needed to make it clear to her that I wouldn't be singing and leave just as quickly as I came.

Right now I needed my own space and to be able to bury myself in my blanket and allow what was trying to break out of me to just flow naturally. I couldn’t fight it any longer.

I take a deep breath, trying to steady the tremor working its way down my body and look around the dimly lit room. It looked much bigger now that it was completely empty. The lights were off and the rays from the sun now gone as dusk quickly covered the skies.

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