Page 44 of Midnight Sanctuary

Her irises are lost behind a haze of unshed tears. “I want you to know that I would do anything to take her place.” My body rejects the very idea, but I don’t interrupt her. “I asked the Russians to take me instead. Ibeggedthem. But they just took Polly and left.”

I glance towards the monitors. Her pressure is climbing steadily. “Listen to me,” I say, engulfing her hand in both of mine. “You did what you could. This is not your fault, Alyssa. I’ll repeat it as many times as I need to until you believe me.”

She swallows. Her throat looks so delicate and vulnerable with the motion, with all these wires running into her and machines chirping on all sides. “Polly was the first person I told.”

My eyebrows pull together. “About what?”

“The babies,” she explains, glancing off towards the window as though she’s watching a play-by-play of the memory. “Well… baby. I didn’t know I was having twins at the time.”

“You told her?”

“She was losing hope in that cell. I could see her fading away right before my eyes. I needed to keep her talking. I did—for a while. But the longer they kept us there… It was so cold, Uri. And they fed our food to the rats just to taunt us. I could see her giving up. I just wanted to give her some hope. Something to look forward to.”

My jaw clenches viciously tight, but I keep my expression neutral. The worry should be mine alone from now on. But her recounting of the capture reminds me of the fact that I never asked for her experience. I never bothered to find out what she went through. I pushed aside her trauma in favor of my own. I pretended that none of it touched her because it was easier than admitting that she was just as much of a victim as Polly was.

So many mistakes. I could drown in them. Hell, Iamdrowning in them.

“What did she say?”

“She was happy—I think…” Alyssa whispers. Her eyes flutter closed for a moment. “She was excited about being an aunt.Goddammit,I wish I remembered more. It’s just… the memory of those few days… They’re so murky. It’s like trying to remember a dream. I’d forgotten I told Polly that I was pregnant until just now.”

“Don’t put pressure on yourself. It’ll come when it’s ready to.”

Alyssa just shakes her head. “But… we don’t have that kind of time. Polly—”

“Polly is a Bugrov through and through. She’s a hell of a lot more capable than you think. She’ll be okay until I find her. And Iwillfind her, Alyssa. I promise you that.”

Another heartbreaking tear rolls down her cheek. “If anything happens to her… I’ll never forgive myself.”

“You’ll have to, Alyssa,” I tell her gently. “You’ll have to forgive yourself for the sake of those babies you’re carrying. I know I have no right to ask this of you anymore… but I need you to trust me.” Her eyes have gone foggy and I wonder if she’s getting everything I’m saying. “Let me worry about getting Polly back and you focus on keeping those babies healthy and strong.”

She nods. “I-I’ll try.”

Her eyelids dip; her blood pressure recedes ever-so-slightly. Like her body is saying that all she needed from me was just a little bit of comfort. Just a little bit of kindness.

I’ve never been good at either, except for when it came to family. But it’s becoming more and more clear to me the longer I stay by her bedside, watching her sleep…

Alyssaisfamily now.

The littlenarushitelstole more than a package from my doorstep—she stole her way into a world I thought I’d walled off forever.

So yes, she’s family. She’s loved. She’s one of us. And now that I’ve made peace with that—late, but better that than never—I need to dig deep and focus all my energy and resources on getting Polly back.

Before the darkness swallows her forever.

21

ALYSSA

Uri looks at me differently now. TheI-wish-I’d-never-laid-eyes-on-youlook has officially been replaced. Now, his expression borders onyou-are-not-to-lift-a-finger-without-my-permission-first.

Honestly, I’m not sure which is worse.

“What do you need?” he demands the moment I straighten up and reach behind me.

“I just want to adjust the pillow,” I say calmly.

“I can do that for you. Next time, just ask.”

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