Page 107 of Midnight Sanctuary

I take the cup and have a sip. It’s strong, just the way I like it. And it burns on the way down, just like I need.

“Are you gonna tell me why you look like you wanna burn down the hospital?” A nurse happens to pass at that very moment and she throws us a startled, wide-eyed glance. Nikolai gives her a sheepish grin in return. “Just a figure of speech, don’t worry.”

She doesn’t look all that soothed as she continues down the hallway.

“Is it Alyssa?” he asks once we’re alone again. “Is she okay? Is it the babies?”

I try to breathe through my frustration. “Grigory thinks the babies should be delivered now. He thinks it’s the best chance for Alyssa and for the healthier baby.”

Nikolai raises his eyebrows. “‘The healthier baby’?”

I sigh and close my eyes. The bitter taste of the coffee lingers on my tongue like motor oil. “The weaker baby may not make it.”

“And what does Alyssa think?”

“Alyssa wants to wait.” I grit my teeth and wait until the tide of anger recedes a bit before continuing. “She thinks she can hold out until the weaker baby is stronger.”

It pisses me off that Nikolai doesn’t look as enraged as I feel right now. In fact, he nods with an expression that looks suspiciously like understanding. “She wants to try and do her best for the second baby.”

“At the cost of her own life?” I hiss. “Her pregnancy is high-risk, Nikolai. If one of the babies experiences fetal distress, we’re talking about an emergency C-section that could result in infection and severe blood loss. She coulddie.”

“She’s a mother,” Nikolai says simply. “Of course she would think that’s a worthy risk.”

“The doctors are supposed to tell her otherwise. I should’ve sent Grigory to fucking Norilsk years ago.”

Nikolai coughs on his sip of coffee. Norilsk is the most frozen, isolated shithole in all of Russia. It’s not a threat to be made lightly. “Grigory’s been with us for years. He knows his shit.”

“I’m about to make himeathis shit if he doesn’t save them all.”

Sighing, my brother claps me on the shoulder. “I get it; you’re scared. But right now, you need to support her. Fighting her will get you nowhere.”

I fix him with a snide glare. “Of course you’re taking her side. Fucking figures.”

“‘Her side’?” Nikolai balks. “I wasn’t aware there were ‘sides’ here. We’re all one family now, Uri.”

“Is that what you would like me to believe?”

His brow lifts up higher. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“You think I haven’t noticed how close you’ve become to Alyssa? The long conversations, the inside jokes, the way you look at her?”

His eyes go wide with shock at first. Then they narrow with anger. “I’m not even gonna dignify that vile shit you just spewed with a response. You are my brother; she’s my friend. I just happen to believe that, as the mother who’s carrying those babies, Alyssa has the right to make the final decision on what she wants to do, how long she wants to carry for, and how she gets to bring them into this world.”

I glower at him. “I preferred it when you hated her.”

I’m painfully aware that I’m not being my best self at this moment, but the fear is clouding out any calm I might’ve otherwise had. All I can concentrate on is the fact that I have absolutely no control over any of this and it’s making me want to break shit.

“I never hated Alyssa,” Nikolai retorts defensively. “I just wanted to avoid bringing her into this kind of situation. I didn’t think it was a responsible decision to involve a civilian into our world. And look what’s happened since then—obviously, I was right.”

“So this is all my fault then—is that what you’re trying to say?”

“Get your head out of your ass, Uri! I’m not blaming you; I’m not blaming anyone. What’s happened has happened. This is the situation we’re in and youhave to decide what kind of man you want to be. Don’t you get it? This is not about you at all. This is about Alyssa and those babies. She thinks about those babies she’s carrying and she sees herself and her sister. Losing one of the twins would be like losing Ziva all over again. Why do you think she’s so determined to savebothof them? Because she couldn’t save her sister!”

Well, fuck.Nothing like harsh truth being thrown in your face to make you wake the hell up.

“Goddammit,” I mutter under my breath.

Nikolai eyes me warily. “It’s time for you to step up, little brother. It’s time to see what you’re made of when you can’t control every little thing around you.”

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