Now, I’m wearing a white T-shirt with the word “Texaco” on the front. The black sweatpants fit nice and cover my legs. I haven’t worn pants since I was a child. I like how the fabric feels against my skin.
When Luca, Ghost, and the handsome man named Thorn showed up, they were wearing black and had paint on their faces. Now, they look like their normal selves.
Luca is beautiful with the lightest blonde hair. Her blue eyes are so bright. She looks like a model. Her handsome husband’s brown hair is tied back. His dark beard is thick. His eyes are a different shade of blue than hers.
They seem comfortable together. Playful, I guess. I’ve never seen people act that way, where touching isn’t about fucking.
Is that what Giselle shares with her husband? I think they said his name is Apex. That seems wrong, too. I think of the motorcycle club thing. Their women have strange names, so it seems sensible for the men also to have odd names.
Luca doesn’t respond immediately to my question about Giselle. She sits squished against Ghost in the very back bench of the RV. Thorn is jammed in another corner. They feel too large for this RV. Or maybe the RVs aren’t meant for so many people.
“We don’t want Giselle to remember,” Luca explains as her hand slides across Ghost’s hand resting on her knee. “But you were close, right?”
“She’s my sister.”
“I had a sister,” Luca says, watching me in the dimly lit area. “We weren’t close. I still suffered to protect her. I understand why you’d be willing to suffer for Giselle, especially if you were close.”
“She’s the only person I love,” I say, tearing up. “They don’t want us to be close. Or feel safe. They pitted us against each other to be favored. Giselle and I would plan together who would turn on the other one when the Black Gold Four were watching. We had to act that way. I never wanted to hurt her for real.”
Luca’s expression goes hard, and I feel like I’m sharing too much. Lowering my chin, I want to disappear. I know I’m a bad person. I lived a bad life. I don’t deserve to be free. I should have burned up with my father’s body and our house. I was just another one of his possessions deserving to be destroyed.
“We’re afraid just seeing you will trigger Giselle’s memories,” Thorn says, and I peek at him before feeling guilty for finding him handsome. “But she might end up remembering one day anyway. It wouldn’t be fair to lie to her and hide you from her.”
“It might be alittlefair,” Ghost mutters at Thorn. “Giselle just had a kid. She’s vulnerable. Maybe we can wait.”
“And do what with Celine?” Thorn asks, sounding angry.
Ghost narrows his eyes, seeming suddenly dangerous. “The Sanctuary’s a big place. We can have them avoid each other for a while.”
“And the other Dolls are supposed to hide, too?”
“Look, I don’t know,” Ghost grumbles and rubs at his sleepy eyes. “I just don’t want Giselle to flip out. She’s got kids to take care of. Do you think little Amelia can handle having her mommy crying all the time?”
Thorn loses his irritation and looks sad. “What if knowing her sister makes Giselle happy?”
“What if it destroys her?” Ghost snaps back.
Luca clears her throat. “We’ve had this conversation before. More than once. We decided to leave the situation to Overlord.”
“Who?” I whisper, afraid to draw the men’s anger.
Luca gives me a tight smile. “He’s our leader.”
“I thought that was Papa Bear. Are you not with the Born Villains Motorcycle Club? Did I misunderstand?”
“Papa Bear retired,” Thorn explains, drawing my gaze to him. “You’ll still meet him. Giselle spends a lot of time at his house. She’s close with his wife.”
I can’t comprehend Giselle being alive and living a life with a husband and kids. How did all that happen? I mourned her. In my heart, she feels gone forever.
“I will go away to protect Giselle.”
Luca looks at me until I hold her gaze. “Giselle is a tiny thing. I thought she was weak when we met, but she’s tough enough to face her past. You remember it, and you’re not a bowl of mush. Let’s just settle down for the rest of the drive. We’ll get you situated like every other castoff. I went through it. Giselle did, too. You’ll go through that before you need to decide if you want to stay.”
Ghost grins at Luca. “You’re so fucking bossy.”
“I’m just obeying our President. You two are fucking rebels,” she says, wagging her finger between Ghost and Thorn. “How dare you disobey Overlord? I ought to snitch on you.”
Ghost wraps an arm around Luca’s shoulders and settles down. “I don’t care if Overlord gives me shit. I’m going to protect Apex’s family.”