Page 29 of Jester

The sisters impressed Luca early on. However, she considered leaving them behind for this job. A few years back, Rave and Riot killed a pair of skeevy dealers messing with our territory. The losers had a neglected three-year-old boy in their care. Rather than ditch Michael and hope foster care worked out, the sisters took him in and have been raising him together.

Luca didn’t want the guilt of leaving the now seven-year-old boy motherless if things went to shit in Texas. But Riot and Rave consistently nailed Luca’s drills at the Sanctuary’s obstacle course. Eventually, their talents outweighed her worries.

The same can be said for Thorn—the Born Villains’ muscled, blond-haired, blue-eyed Sergeant-at-Arms—who drives the second RV. Every time he goes on one of these out-of-town missions, he gets his soft heart banged up. Thorn can’t shake off violence like some people. That’s why Luca initially figured he wouldn’t do well.

Yet, unlike the younger guys who can get easily distracted, Thorn always remains focused on the plan. He might mope about shit later, but he doesn’t freeze up in the midst of violence.

Over the last year, Luca auditioned a few dozen club members to go on this mission. She’s a no-nonsense bitch about hunting assholes, meaning she refused to take it easy on anyone’s feelings. If she didn’t think they could handle what might go down, she cut them.

We’re more than ready, yet Overlord kept holding off. Now, he’s pulled the trigger and sent us south to finish this thing.

After we reach the Texas border, our group stops for burgers. Inside the RVs, I sit across from Luca who stares at me as lovestruck as when we met. Though I don’t get why she went crazy for me rather than a less fucked-up man, I’m never letting her go.

In the next RV, Thorn’s group sounds like they’re having a party. I hear metal music playing and plenty of laughter. The sisters must figure they’re missing out because they bail on Luca and me.

Watching me with her electric blue eyes, Luca randomly states, “We can’t save everyone.”

“I know.”

“I’m prepping myself to leave behind the Dolls who are too brainwashed to save. I’ve never willingly left anyone behind.”

“Neither have I, but if they’re loyal to the Black Gold Four bullshit, they can’t succeed at the Sanctuary. They might call the cops and get the law involved in club business.”

“I know, but they’re still victims of terrible abuse. I’m bound to feel weird about leaving them behind.”

Realizing Luca wants me to understand her feelings, rather than try to rationalize them, I reply, “We’ll feel weird together.”

Luca offers me a great smile. “We’ll save the others. That’ll have to be enough.”

For a moment, I think about those brainwashed Dolls unwilling to escape. One day, they might look back at their choice and regret what freedom might have tasted like. I think of them being so fucked up they’d rather remain a sex toy. Their insanity makes sense to a guy like me. After all, I’m wired wrong. I’ve sabotaged a lot of my happiness over the years. Hell, when I first met Luca, I nearly lost her more than once just because I refused to trust her.

A creepy sensation crawls over my skin, and I feel on display. Even knowing no one is watching me, I can’t shake my paranoia.

I set aside my burger and wrap my arms around Luca. Her familiar scent soothes the weird sensation seeping into my flesh.

I can’t lose control on this job. If I fuck up, Luca might die, and I’ll have no reason to go on. Just thinking of her dead steals my breath and sends me spiraling.

As usual, I struggle against my urge to assume the worst. I picture us getting ambushed as soon as we step on the estate. Our inside man might be setting us up. I can’t see past all the things that might go wrong.

Luca holds me while singing “Joey.” The gloom suffocating me breaks slightly. Luca’s got a terrible singing voice. Somehow, that makes me love her singing even more.

With her help, I picture myself back home in our new house. I imagine Hope cuddled up in a nearby chair with her cat. I see us watching another classic movie. Luca’s been talking about trying one of those black-and-white films like “Citizen Kane” or “Casablanca.”

In my head, I visualize Apex next door in his house with Twinkle Toes, Amelia, and Anna. They’ll know Zack Reinhart is dead, and whoever we could save has their second chance. I don’t let myself feel bad for the Dolls too broken to save. I only see the women breathing free in the Sanctuary.

Finally, I let myself dream of what Luca and I can build once the job is over and we’re finally back home for good.

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