Page 78 of Dirty Gambit

“Has been taken care of.” Painfully beautiful and elegant in a cream pantsuit with three layers of pearls at her neck, Nicole stepped into the room. Eyes so much like Jaxon’s met Lena’s, watchful but not hostile. “You’re awake.”

It wasn’t stated as a question, yet Lena found herself replying, “Yes.”

Under the woman’s unwavering gaze, Lena fought not to fidget. Her injuries prevented her from hoisting herself higher against the pillows, but she managed to straighten her shoulders. Nicole drifted closer to the bed and stopped when she could go no further without climbing across the mattress.

“How are you feeling?”

It was a reasonable question.

A normal one, even.

It was the type of question one would be expected to ask someone who had recently been shot, yet, coming from a woman who had no reason to care whether or not Lena lived or died, the unexpected concern made Lena uneasy.

“Fine. Thank you.” Was the best she could do without outwardly narrowing her eyes in suspicion.

Lena had met her fair share of foster parents who fawned and doted over their wards in front of others but beat them to an inch of their lives when no one was looking. She had seen what hid behind false sympathies and worries. Nicole had no reason to be kind or understanding. She had no reason to actually care. All signs pointed to Lena being the cause of all her pain, the reason her children were kidnapped at gunpoint. The reason a crazed drug dealer nearly killed her entire family. The reason the media was hounding them, upturning their lives. She had earned the right to tear Lena to shreds.

Yet she stood at Lena’s bed, wary, but determined.

Nicole resumed her cool scrutiny for a minute long before focusing on the third figure in the room. “Have you informed Babette that our guest has awakened?”

Jaxon, who had yet to move since his mother’s entry, shook his head. “We were just talking.”

A pale eyebrow arched on Nicole’s beautiful face. “Don’t you think it would be more prudent that Lena is checked before having a conversation?”

Her son took in a breath and shot Lena a rueful grin before pulling himself away from her. He was careful not to jostle the bed too much when he slid to his feet and stood at her other side.

Don’t leave me alone with her,Lena wanted to beg, but he was already gone and Lena was left alone with the blonde goddess watching her with narrowed scrutiny.

When it stretched on into what felt like an eternity of uncomfortable silence, Lena opened her own mouth to break it. “I’m—”

“I wasn’t sure what I was going to say once you woke up,” Nicole cut in, in the same leveled tone. “I keep going between having you skewered and roasted on an open flame and wanting to give you a chance to explain what you were thinking.”

Lena lowered her gaze in shame, twin, hot flames in her cheeks. “I’m—”

“Not yet,” Nicole sliced in with brisk efficiency. “I’m not finished.”

Head still bowed, Lena waited, waited to have her hide stripped, waited for the threats, the ominous promises. She waited for Nicole to swear a slow and torturous death. Instead, she moved away from Lena’s left side, circled the foot of the bed to stand next to the abandoned chair on her right. She gathered up the discarded throw and neatly pressed the corners together until a neat square remained, which was draped over the back of the chair.

Nicole sat. One toned leg crossed over the other. “You have put me in one of the most complicated situations I have ever had to face. In fact, I can’t think of a single other moment in my life where I have ever felt so helpless or scared. Jaxon and Richard keep assuring me that it’s over, yet I find myself waking up in the middle of the night and racing into Jessie’s room just to make sure she’s still there. The whole way down the hall, my heart is going a million miles a minute and I can’t breathe. I can’t until I see her, touch her, and know she’s safe and sound, and there. You did that. You made my home unsafe. You made my family vulnerable. I have never truly hated anyone, but I want so much to be able to hate you, to blame you for everything that happened. I want to put the burden on you for bringing that monster to my doorstep. But I can’t.”

Lena’s head jerked up, her wide eyes fixed on the woman seated next to her, watching her with raw emotion gleaming in her green eyes.

Nicole sucked in a low, shaky breath and broke the steely connection for the first time since walking into the room. “That creature I abhor to speak of by name was already coming for her. If you hadn’t taken Jessie when you did, we would have lost her forever. I would have lost my family. Funny, isn’t it?” She offered Lena a humorless smirk. “Before he broke down the door and charged into my home, all I wanted was for you to bring them back. Afterwards, all I wanted was for them to stay as far away as possible. That whole time I was tied to that chair, I kept thanking God over and over again that my children weren’t there.” She looked away again. “Then you offered yourself to that beast in exchange for my family’s life, people you don’t even know. You could have walked away…”

“I couldn’t,” Lena murmured quietly.

Hot, angry tears shone in the other woman’s eyes when they found Lena’s again. “You could have. You came knowing what you were walking into. You came when you could have ran.” Lena opened her mouth to argue but Nicole was on a roll. “You gave yourself to that monster knowing what would happen, knowing what he … I would never want that for anyone, not even my worst enemy. No one should ever have to…” she broke off, dropping her gaze to her lap. “You jumped into the path of a bullet to save my son. You could have died. I owe you so much…”

It was Lena’s turn to look away, deeply uncomfortable by the change in the conversation. She’d been so prepared, so braced to be berated, screamed, and yelled at. She wasn’t prepared to be praised. The oddity of that made her want the woman to leave.

“Please stop,” she whispered, wishing she could roll off the bed and run. “I don’t—”

“You will listen.” The steel was back in Nicole’s words. “You owe me that much.” She waited until Lena had met her gaze once more. The hard edges in her command were absent in the softness of her eyes, her mouth. She wasn’t a woman ready for battle, but one who had already faced it and was too exhausted to keep fighting. “Hating you would make my life easier,” she said again, lips barely forming around the words. “But it won’t change the facts. It won’t change that you are Jessie’s aunt. It won’t change that you’re still family. It won’t change that my family is here and whole because of you. It won’t change that I owe you everything.”

“You don’t owe me anything,” Lena blurted before she could stop herself, anger and panic merging into a fist-sized ball wedged in her chest. “I didn’t do it for you. I wasn’t thinking about you or your family when I decided to take Jessie. I didn’t care what you might feel or might happen to you when Travis showed up. I only cared about her and me, and Lissa. Don’t make me the good guy here, Mrs. Westwick.”

Pale eyes sharpened. Nicole studied her with a narrowed focus. For a moment, she was certain she’d gotten through to the woman.

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