“Just because I've never tried it. I mean you do it too,” she said.

“Just because I can handle it. I've never been covered with marks like this,” I said. “This is just being cruel. Or do you enjoy it?”

I was hoping she'll say no.

“I'm getting used to it,” she looked away. “I'm slowly getting the hang of it and it's not that bad.”

“No one wants to see a bride covered with scars on her wedding day,” I informed her. “If you don't like it you have to say no. You can't be doing this to yourself.”

“I know what I'm doing, Olivia.”

“No, no you don't,” I scolded her. “You never know what you're doing. I told you this was a bad idea. I told you to leave if it gets too much.”

“And I'm saying I can't leave and it's not too much!” she yelled in response. “Why do you always have to act like you're better than me?”

“I don't act like….”

“Don't give me that. Ever since you left the escort life, you unconsciously looked down on the rest of us still in it,” she cut me off. “You're the one who goes around talking about how you want to do things with your own hands. How do you think it makes the rest of us feel?”

“Well if it makes you feel bad you could always change,” I shrugged.

“There! Right there! You're doing it again,” she said as she pointed at me. “Why do you always have to say that? You think the rest of us are as smart as you are?”

I decided to remain silent.

“You were once desperate weren't you?” she continued. “It took you two years, and you saw how difficult it was to change. Now you come to Richmond through my recommendation. Get a job at my finance’s son's hospital. Without having to do much and you still want to claim hard work? Don't you see how conceited that makes you?”

I had no words to defend myself. In a lot of ways, she was right. What she said reminded me of what Lucas had said about my aunt; most of them were in situations they could do nothing about.

Knowing Kate, I'm sure she tried as well; yet I had made her look bad.

“I know it hurts,” she said as she put on a bathrobe, “but I can deal with it.”

“I'm sorry,” I apologized.

“And I don't need your sorry,” she groaned. “It won't do anything for me.”

“At least, accept my worry?” I demanded. “I understand that you had no other choice. But you have to understand that this…isn't it.”

I held her shoulders. “Maybe you should just let me help you. You can walk away from this. And I will walk away with you. I can talk to Lucas and…”

“And I think I can handle this on my own,” she said as she brushed my hand away. “I'm fine really.”

I wanted to tell her about the infidelity, but I was worried about what James would do. Lucas had dropped hints that his father was a dangerous person. If Kate and I were to carelessly expose his infidelity, he could make sure I didn't get a job ever again and he could ruin her. I still wanted to help my friend.

“I'll be fine,” she repeated. “How about I join you for breakfast?”

“I would like that,” I said.

Maybe I would have to talk to James directly.

Chapter twenty-one

Not Comfortable (2)

Olivia

She joined me for breakfast as promised; it felt good seeing her out eating again. I headed straight to the hospital afterward to tell Lucas what had happened, but he wasn't available. He was in the operating room trying to save a victim of some gruesome car accident. So, I had no one to talk to.