Page 69 of Behind the Net

“Do you want to fuck him?”

The ultimate revenge would be fucking you. I can’t believe I said that.

“Yes,” I squeak out, blushing. “But we can’t.”

She sighs. “You know how I feel about hockey players, but ifyouwant to, andhewants to…” She gives me an encouraging look. “Why not?”

Because I already like him as more than a friend. What if I fall for him, only to move out in a few months and never talk to him again? What if I start to like him too much, and he pulls a Zach on me?

I’ve already been crushed once this year. I can’t go through it again. Jamie’s so insanely hot and so out of my league, it isn’t even a possibility that he won’t break my heart.

“Pippa,” Hazel says, “just keep it casual with him. Guys are only as faithful as their options, especially these guys.” She shrugs. “Don’t forget who he is. And leave your emotions out of it.”

Easy for her to say. Hazel always keeps relationships temporary and uncomplicated, but I don’t know how to do that.

I live with Jamie. I work for Jamie. We text and talk about our day. His dog is basically my best friend. I hang out with his mom.

Nothing about this is uncomplicated. My emotions are already fully involved, and if I let it go any further, it’s going to hurt like hell.

* * *

That afternoon, I get home earlier than expected, and Jamie’s shoes are in the front hall closet, but the apartment is quiet. Daisy’s tired after our hike so heads to the couch to nap, and I wander up to my room to charge my phone.

As I pass Jamie’s door, I hear my name in his low voice, barely above a murmur.

My heart stops. Is he talking about me on the phone? I frown and lean in, listening. This is totally wrong, but if he is, I have to know what he’s saying. My skin prickles as I press my ear against the door.

“Fuck,” he mutters in the same tone as when we were kissing. A low, needy groan.

My eyes go wide. My skin heats as I imagine what he looks like on the other side of the door, fisting his cock and wincing with pleasure.

“Pippa.” I hear his low moan through the door and feel a rush of wetness between my legs.

My hot hockey player boss is jerking off while moaning my name. A thrill shoots through me, and I picture us together, all the hard planes of his body while he touches me, urging me on.

Jamie would be so, so different from Zach in bed.You can do it, Jamie said when I was uncertain about performing in the bar.

I bet he’d say that in bed, too.

CHAPTER34

JAMIE

Pippa comes homethe next evening with Daisy and stops short in the kitchen, tilting her head with a surprised smile.

“What’s this?” she asks, gesturing at the massive mess I’ve made.

I rub the back of my neck, feeling stupid. I can’t believe I thought this was a good idea.

“Dinner,” I manage, meeting her gaze before looking away. “I made dinner for us.”

I’m a fucking wreck. I can’t stop thinking about her having orgasms in her room with the toy, and I can’t stop worrying she’ll find out it’s from me. She must not know I sent it—it’s the only explanation for why she hasn’t quit or called HR. When I think about her moving out, I feel sick. When I imagine the look on her face as she finds out I bought it for her, I want to tear my hair out.

I’ve tried compartmentalizing Pippa. I’ve tried placing her in a separate box in my mind and saving thoughts of her lush mouth, perfect tits, and round, smackable ass for the moment I climb into bed every night.

None of it’s working. She’s constantly in my thoughts, and me buying her that toy is a looming axe above whatever we are.

I’m falling apart, so I’m making dinner for us. I don’t know why. I don’t seem to understand logic anymore. Not where Pippa’s concerned.

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