Page 42 of Forever Yours

With a quiet snick, Julien closed and locked the door, then leaned back against it, blocking the only exit to the room, like he was afraid I’d try and bolt at any moment.

“You’re really upset.”

Not a question.

“You think?” I countered.

He slid down the door until his butt hit the floor. Hugging his arms around his bent knees, he puffed his cheeks out, then blew out the air in an audible rush.

“I wasn’t drunk. I only had one beer.”

I looked at him like he was stupid.

“You got in a fight. With your brother. Over a girl. Who looked like Liz.” I enunciated each syllable.

His silvery eyes burned to a gunmetal gray. “Iwasn’tdrunk.”

I lifted my hands, only to drop them immediately after. “Do you know how it makes me feel? You and Jayson fighting over some girl because you thought she was Liz?”

“That’s not… it wasn’t like that…fuuuuck!” His head whacked back against the door so hard, it had to hurt. Eyes squeezed shut, he said, “We want to hire a private investigator.”

Stunned, I could only blink. He hadn’t said anything. And how were they going to pay for a PI? The guys didn’t have jobs.

He gave a dejected laugh. “For a second, I thought it was her. That she was here. She came back.”

When he dropped his chin and our eyes met, I softly asked, “Have you considered that maybe she doesn’t want to come back?”

It was something I had contemplated more than once. Maybe Liz wanted a fresh start, a chance at a new life to discover who she was and who she wanted to be without the constant pressures from Jayson, Ryder, and Julien demanding her time and attention. I had commented more than once to Julien that I felt sorry for Liz. They secluded her and kept her in a bubble. She did what they wanted. She liked what they liked. She went where they told her to. Music was the only thing that was truly hers.

Julien looked stricken, his complexion going ashen. He shook his head in denial. “I can’t believe that. I can’t.”

I could argue with him. Try to get him to understand how his guilt over what happened to Liz was seeping into our relationship like a viscous, oily tar. How things needed to change. But I wasn’t in the mood to argue or fight anymore, and I knew whatever I said would fall on deaf ears. He wasn’t ready to hear them, and I just didn’t have the energy.

Falling onto my back on the bed, I studied the dust-riddled five-blade ceiling fan. It needed a good cleaning.

“Mom called today.”

I didn’t hear Julien get up from the floor, but I felt the mattress dip when he slid to lie beside me. He nestled his head on my chest under my chin, one arm draped over me, his hand tucked under my shoulder at the armpit.

“When? Why in the hell is she trying to call you?”

He smelled like Ivory soap from the shower he took after the game. My nose nuzzled his soft hair, taking comfort in the clean scent. Julien was the only person other than my dad and Fallon who knew the whole story about what happened with Mom and why she left.

“Right before the game.”

“I was wondering where you went. I thought it was to the bathroom. What’d she want?”

Julien despised Mom. I couldn’t blame him. I despised her most days, too. For walking out. For the words she said. The pain they caused. Words could inflict worse damage and leave behind deeper scars than any physical blow. Superficial bruises healed over time; wounds to your heart never did.

“To tell me she’s getting married.”

His head lifted. “Seriously?”

“She said her fiancé wants me to come to the wedding.”

Dark-brown eyebrows hiked high. “Notshewanted, buthewanted?”

I nodded.