Page 58 of The Second Chance Year

My eyes widen. My mom gasps. From somewhere far away, Owen mutters, “Whoa, dude.” I stare at Alex. Is he really doing this right now, in front of everyone?

“Sadie,” Alex says, gazing into my eyes. “Will you marry me?”

Yep. He’s really doing this right now, in front of everyone.

Alex pulls out a ring that gives Jacob’s colossal bite of pie a run for its money, and my mom makes a choking sound in the back of her throat. My eyes dart around the room at the surprised expressions on the faces of our Thanksgiving guests, who probably weren’t expecting quite such a show when they RSVPed to dinner. Eventually, it lands on my parents.

For the first time in as long as I can remember, they’re looking right at me with matching expressions of pride and happiness. And it’s startling, because I’m used to seeing them gaze distractedly over my shoulder as if we’re at a party and they’re checking to see if someone more important walkedin. I’m used to their disinterest, their nods and shrugs, their not-quite-listening to what I have to say. And I’m used to them not having much to say tomeunless it’s to tell me what to do or criticize something I’ve done. For my whole life, I’ve been a disappointment, a failure. I’ve screwed up everything with my rash decisions, my big mouth, and my terrible career choices.

But today… something amazing happened. Today, I’m no longer a stale, store-bought Twinkie. I’m homemade angel food cake with Chantilly cream and fresh strawberries. Today, I finally have my parents’ love and approval. All I have to do is open my mouth and sayyes.

Just say yes.

My gaze jerks to Jacob and, for one brief moment, our eyes lock. And then he looks away, and I deflate like an over-proofed bread loaf.

“I can’t.”

Alex blinks. “Excuse me?”

My dad flops back in his chair, and my mom hisses, “Really, Sadie?” like I’m a toddler who’s gotten into the sugar and dumped it all over the floor.

“I can’t marry you, Alex.”

Alex goes pale. “You’re serious?”

I look down at my hands. “I don’t think we’re a good fit for each other. And once you have a little distance, once you meet someone whoisa good fit…” I remember that woman in Alex’s Instagram photos, the one he started dating after we broke up during my Very Bad Year. I hope he’ll run into hersomewhere. He looked happy in those photos, and maybe she can be what he wants. “I think you’ll realize that we’re both better off.”

“Sadie, I think we should talk about this. If you’ll justlisten—”

I shake my head. I have no idea what I’m doing with my life. But I know this isn’t it. “I’m sorry, Alex.” And with that, I stand up and run out of the room.

Chapter 31

December

December at Xavier’s is always a busy time of the year with private parties and holiday gatherings, and this year, I’m working overtime to make sure everything is perfect. I’m expecting the announcement about the executive pastry chef any day now, and Ineedthat job. My parents are still mad about the scene I caused at Thanksgiving, and I can’t go home this Christmas and tell them I lost the promotion, too.

That’s why it’s after eleven o’clock at night, the rest of the staff has gone home, and I’m still at Xavier’s prepping pastries for the Christmas parties that start a couple of days from now. After weighing and measuring out my dry ingredients into lidded containers, I carefully label each one so all I have to do is add them later to the mixer with eggs, milk, and butter. I’m stacking them in the pantry, just about ready to head home, when Xavier appears in the doorway. I jump about a hundred feet in the air, knocking into my tower of Tupperware, but I manage to straighten it just before it topples.

“Oh my gosh, you scared me.” I press a hand to my heart. “I didn’t know anyone else was still here.”

“I was doing some paperwork in the office.” His gaze slowly sweeps down to my feet and then back up.

I cross my arms over my chest. The kitchen was hot from the ovens and woodfire grill burning all day, so I’d ditched mychef’s coat a while ago, and now I’m standing here in a tank top and leggings. I definitely would’ve stayed covered up if I’d known anyone else was here. We’re not even allowed to wear chef’s coats without the name of the restaurant embroidered on the pocket. Is Xavier annoyed that I’m out of uniform? In the lead-up to this promotion, I’ve been extra careful not to do anything that could be viewed as unprofessional, and I really hope I’m not screwing this up when I’m working so hard to do everything right.

“You’re here late,” Xavier finally says.

“Yeah, I’m getting some ingredients prepped for the holiday.” I flash him an overly bright smile and give one of the canisters a shake. “Just trying to be prepared.”

Xavier takes a couple of steps into the pantry so he can read the labels I’ve taped to the sides of the containers.

“Very good. I appreciate your hard work.”

Whew.He’s not mad. Still, with Xavier’s roller-coaster moods, it could have gone either way. “Just doing what I can for the good of the restaurant.” It can’t hurt to suck up a little more.

Xavier takes another step toward me, and I’m aware that he’s standing awfully close. It’s a narrow space, and two people don’t usually come in here at the same time. Despite the heat in the kitchen, goose bumps pop up on my arms. I try to inch backward without it looking obvious.

“I wanted to let you know that I’ll be making the announcement about our new executive pastry chef next week,” he says with a smile. “I think you’ll beveryhappy to hear the news.”

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