Page 18 of Your Fault

Nick stopped behind a Mercedes and looked over at me.

“If I were given a choice, I would always choose you,” he said so coldly, it chilled my blood. I looked at him incredulously. His tone hurt, and I felt guilty because of what he was suggesting. I shouldn’t have to choose between the two people I loved most in the world, especially because I loved them in two totally different ways: I loved my mother above all else, but the love I felt for Nicholas was impossible to explain; it was a love that hurt. I adored him, but his intensity frightened me. Igot out, turning back around when I realized he was still in the driver’s seat.

“You’re n-not going to stay?” I asked, voice trembling. Shit! There I was again, feeling abandonment, dependency… I didn’t want him to leave me; I needed him next to me; I needed to share that night with him, a night when my boyfriend wassupposedto be with me.

He looked away toward the people climbing the steep stairs toward reception.

“I don’t know. I need to be by myself,” he hissed in that tone I hated, the one that reminded me of the old Nicholas.

I could feel the rage overtaking me. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair for him to take this out on me when I’d had nothing to do with it.

“Fuck you, Nicholas! We were supposed to spend the night together for the first time in weeks, and you’re ready to waste the opportunity.” My anger reaching a fever pitch, I shouted, “Just go! I’ll have way more fun without you!”

The jerk didn’t even wait to see me go inside. Making the tires squeal—makingmytires squeal, because it wasmycar—he sped up and disappeared down a side street, leaving me with no options for getting away if I got tired of the stupid party.

I walked over to the steps, where my classmates were chatting excitedly. I could have joined any number of groups there, but I wasn’t in the mood to pretend I was all happy. I wasn’t: I was wounded. Wounded and pissed.

“Hey, Morgan!”

I turned around and saw Lion’s smiling face. My eyes lit up. The last time I’d seen him, he’d been distant and cold. I was happy to see him so happy. Just as Jenna had become my best friend and confidante, so I’d grown to really care about Lion: he was great, caring, kind, and never intimidated me. I’d thought he would at first, especially because he was Nicholas’s friend, but nothingcould be further from reality. Lion was a sweetie. He walked over, and I hugged him.

“Congratulations!” he said.

“Thanks!” I replied.

“Where’s Nick?” he asked, looking around, and my smile immediately disappeared.

“He left. We had a fight,” I said, and to my surprise, Lion laughed, provoking a bitter stare from me.

“I’ll give him half an hour, and he’ll come crawling back, and you won’t get him off of you… That’s the longest he could stand to be away from you,” he said, ignoring my irritation and taking out his cell phone.

“Good for him. I’d just as soon he stayed gone.”

Lion rolled his eyes with his attention on his screen. “Jenna will be here in ten. You want to go on in with me?” he asked.

I nodded. It should have been Nicholas there celebrating with me, but screw him, he’d missed his chance. I’d gotten dressed up especially for him, I’d even bought underwear at this mega-expensive shop Jenna had told me about, and now he would never see it. I was so bitter and disappointed that I had smoke coming out of my ears.

The vestibule was impressive. The people were packed in like sardines, and lots of parents were there, too, having drinks. A few guys in uniform showed us where to go, and Lion followed their directions with me behind him. Everyone was laughing and talking, and then we reached the terrace.

It was spectacular! This must have been the greatest graduation party in history! Under the open sky, there were tall tables with green satin tablecloths surrounding a dance floor. The floral arrangements were exquisite: white peonies, if I wasn’t mistaken. The waiters in their elegant uniforms came and went with trays of canapés and glasses of something or other—I didn’t know what,but it couldn’t be alcohol.

Lion was as fascinated and intimidated as I was. Neither of us had grown up surrounded by such luxuries, and I’m sure we both felt out of place among all those rich, distinguished people.

“They sure know how to throw a party,” he said.

“You’re telling me,” I agreed, bowled over by the beauty of that spectacle. Pale white lights lit up the terrace, and the aroma of the flowers was bewitching. The party music hadn’t started yet, and I could still hear the captivating sounds of the violin and cello players softly welcoming us.

“There you guys are!” a familiar voice said behind us. We turned to find Jenna with a huge smile on her face. “Can you believe how many people are here? What do you think? Did I overdo it? Or were you expecting more? Don’t tell me you don’t like it!”

Jenna had been one of the people responsible for organizing the party. She’d spent the better part of the year on it, and I had to say, she’d outdone herself. She was crazy if she thought we didn’t like it.

“What are you saying?” I asked. “It’s incredible!”

I hugged her, admiring her beauty. It was in her genes, of course. Her mother, Caroline Tavish, had been Miss California in her younger days. That title had opened doors for her, all right, since it made one of the richest men in America want to marry her. Jenna’s father was a millionaire, with oil rigs all over the world, and he was hardly home more than two days a month, but according to Jenna, that didn’t mean he didn’t love her mother like crazy… And why wouldn’t he? She was the kind of woman who would leave any man breathless. Jenna had inherited her body and her height, but her face was warmer, sweeter, more childlike than her mother’s, her beauty less stern and imposing.

“I can’t believe we’ve graduated!” she said, leaping into Lion’s arms and leaving a luscious kiss on his lips. He wrappedan arm around her waist and pulled her in close. They said something, I don’t know what, and Jenna turned to face me with a furrowed brow.

“Where’s your Nicholas?”

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