Page 12 of Dear Creed

“Dick move,” he fumes as he stops pacing and sinks back down onto the chair.

I agree. “Total dick move.”

“So, what’s changed? You haven’t answered those questions yet. Why are you suddenly always around, wanting to see me? Do you just not feel those things anymore and want to be friends?” Jake folds his arms across his chest again.

“No. That’s not what I want. I don’t care what everyone else thinks. Not anymore.” I’ve tortured us both for far too long, and now I don’t know if I’ve waited too long to wake the fuck up.

Jake shakes his head slightly. “This is not what I was expecting at all. What are you saying?”

The raw vulnerability in Jake’s eyes gives me hope. At the same time, it breaks my heart. I’d done this to him. I’d put him in a position where my truth appears almost painful for him.

I’m searching for the right words to fix everything, but there aren’t any. All I can do is hope he’ll forgive me. I blow out a shaky breath. “I’m saying I’m fucking sorry. I’m sorry for the year we were apart because I was a complete asshole. I’m sorry I made the call to end our friendship. I’m sorry about everything,exceptfinally telling you the truth. I want to fix this somehow, but I’ll take what I can get, even if you’re only willing to give friendship a try again.” I swallow hard. “But I also want more. I always have. At least since ninth grade.”

Now that he knows everything, I steel myself for his reaction. I expect him to tell me to fuck off. I expect him to be the one that walks away from me this time, and I can’t blame him if that’s what he chooses to do. But he remains seated, not saying a word. I wonder if his mind is as shaken as mine is. It’s both frightening and liberating to know I finally told him everything when I wasn’t sure I’d be able to.

“I don’t know.” Jake bites his lip. “I can’t just let one conversation erase the last year.” He pauses, nibbling his lip again. “Can I?”

I shrug helplessly because I’ve done all I can think of to make things right, but it’ll never be enough. I’d abandoned the person who meant the most to me in the world. “I don’t know. I don’t deserve it, but yeah, I guess that’s what I’m asking because I’m a selfish asshole who’s tired of doing life without you.”

“What if you get scared and jump ship again? If we do this, I need assurances that you’re not going to freak out and bolt the second things get too real for you.”

It’s a fair request, and one I have no hesitation giving. “There’s not a single chance in hell I’m leaving you again. No matter what. Even if you want out, I’m going to be there for you. You were always my best friend, even when I was being a dumbass.”

There’s a long beat of silence that I’m afraid to break, so I wait for him to tell me what he wants this time.

Finally, he whispers two words that make me feel truly alive for the first time in more than a year.

“Kiss me.”

CHAPTEREIGHT

JAKE

Creed doesn’t needto be told twice. He’s off the bed and striding toward me, giving me just enough time to stand before he weaves his fingers through my hair. A low groan rattles in his throat before he dips down, bringing his lips to mine in a feather soft touch. He allows the barely-there kiss to linger, causing my lips to tingle, and then he presses firmly against them. Sliding his tongue along the seam, he asks for permission to deepen the kiss. I readily grant the request, parting my lips and accepting his tongue in my mouth. He tastes of mint, reminding me of his breath on my lips only a week ago.

I break off the kiss, gasping for breath. “What about your roommate?”

“He’s at his girlfriend’s like usual,” he barely whispers. Then he steps over to lock the door. My heart flutters and then he’s back, kissing me like a starving man.

My mind is reeling with all of Creed’s confessions, but through the tangle of thoughts, one thing is clear. I fucking want him.

The kiss is better than anything I’ve ever imagined. A moan slips free from my mouth, and Creed growls. Before I can process what’s happening, I’m flat on my back with Creed between my legs.

“Is this okay?” he rasps.

“Better than okay,” I whisper, and a small grin tilts his lips. With his taste on my tongue, and the feel of his body against mine, I’m on fire. The only thing that would make this better is to feel his skin on mine. I’m waffling on whether to say it because I don’t know how Creed will react, but it turns out I don’t need to breathe a word. As if Creed’s reading my mind, he suddenly rises on his knees and whips his shirt over his head, revealing half of his lean, athletic body.

My mouth goes dry. I’ve seen Creed without a shirt so many times that I have every dip between the muscles memorized. But he’s changed a lot in the last year. His body is even more defined, but I’ve never been allowed to touch him the way I want to.

Slowly, I raise my hand, tracing my finger along the dip between his pecs and then down the center of his firm abs. I draw a circle around his bellybutton before following the thin trail of dark hair that disappears beneath the waistband of the jeans he wears low on his hips.

Creed isn’t breathing, not that I blame him. I don’t think I’ve taken a solid breath since we started. It makes me wonder how far he wants this to go. Though I’ve been with other guys, I don’t know how much experience Creed has with men. What does he want here? I need to know so I don’t push things too far, even if he seems to be the one controlling the pace.

Even though I may not like the answer, I ask, “Have you ever been with a guy?”

Creed slowly shakes his head, finally sucking in a shuddering breath. “No. There’s only one guy I want.”

My chest aches at the admission. It makes me feel special, but I need to be honest with him too. “Creed, I’ve been—”

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