Page 15 of Little Sparrow

“I don’t have a home anymore. I left mine. Before I slept, I stopped at a motel. My view is currently a car park. This just plain feels somehow…relieving.” He shrugs as he stares into the void as though deep in thought. My hand brushes against the muscles of his upper arm for comfort. “Do you want to talk about it?” Finally, his eyes meet mine and he gives me a stern look.

“No.” Dante walks away from me, away from my touch. The air is cold against my fingers, I realise I’m still standing there with my hand raised when I think that if he has nowhere to go, then we can meet. Confidence from inside builds up, and I can’t help but share what my mind is telling me to.

“Fuck those who made you feel this way. Come to London.” My hands rest on my hips as he stares at me with a raised brow.

“I mean it. There are some decent places around here. We don’t always have to meet in dreams. I’d really like that, there's just something different about being around people in person. Besides, you need to prove you’re real.” I know he is real after what my father told me, but I want to push him. My lip tilts up. Now he has a challenge. Come to me.

Chapter eleven

Dante

Travelling through Italy

Abitofattitudein that tiny body. A grin spreads across my lips and I take another step toward her like she’s my prey. Her back hits the light blue coloured wallpaper as my arms crowd around her head. Her confidence wavers.

“You want to know if I’m real?” Slowly I lean in and run my nose along hers, her skin is so soft. How can I be attracted to someone so fast? Her eyes flutter closed, her chest rises and falls with her shallow breaths. My heart threatens to beat out my chest. I’m giving in.

“Does this feel real?” I grasp the back of her head and press my lips against hers. Rose stands completely still, but slowly relaxes into me and parts her lips with my encouragement. I tilt her head back for better access. Her tongue meets mine and they glide against each other. She’s hesitant at first, but when she gets used to the feeling of me, she pulls me in. A fire burns inside me. It feels like bliss, like her hands are beneath my skin, claiming me in a way I didn’t think was possible. I wonder if she wants me just as much as I want her. Her hands spread the warmth on my chest up around my neck as she moans into my mouth, and dizziness overcomes me.

I want to keep hold of her, but now is not the right time, so I pull back. I know I definitely need to find her after tonight. London doesn’t seem like a bad idea.

I stroke my thumb across her puffy lips as she gives me a small smile and her skin flushes down over her chest again, I love that. She bites down on the lip I just touched while I caress her jaw and tilt her head up, innocent eyes stare back up at me.

“More,” she mumbles. Fuck it, the right time would never be, so I give in. I pull her back to me and her hands fist my shirt, pulling me backwards with her until her legs hit the arms of the sofa, she giggles when we fall back, and I’m on top of her. A beautiful shade of red appears on her cheeks. She lifts her hand and fingers graze my face, but I can’t rip my eyes away from her. She doesn’t say anything, but I can’t help but admire the flecks of gold mixed in with her hazel eyes. “Touch me,” she whispers, even though no one is here.

“What?” I ask, needing to know the truth of what she said. Her hand brushes against my forearm before she grabs my wrist and places it on her waist. The smooth silk under my fingertips. We’re both breathing heavy, I’m hard as steel, she can definitely feel me. My hand slides up from her waist, I go slow, savouring this moment. Wishing we were together for real and not over a thousand miles away. My palm rests over her chest, her nipple pebbles underneath the silk and she moans again. I caress her, wanting to be careful if she changes her mind. She arches her back and I kiss her neck, waiting for permission to go further. “Don’t stop. Please.” Her heartbeat is erratic when my lips brush over her pulse. I don’t get any further because she pushes me back, “I’m sorry,” I tell her. Fuck, I went too far.

“Not you, somethings wrong.” When I look back up at her face, her eyes are wide, and she’s looking around. She sits up, untangling our bodies, still staring into the door-shaped mist with a furrow on her brow. “What is it?” I hesitate to ask as I move off her and help her up.

Her body becomes stiff. I follow her line of sight and see nothing, but of course, I wouldn’t. “I… I think I have to go,” she says before disappearing through the mist. Even when I reach out to touch her, she disappears like a ghost. The room feels darker already.

“Fuck,” Now, what do I do? I scan her small apartment and notice a nametag, I memorise the name of the restaurant before everything fades and I wake too.

Chapter twelve

Rose

London, United Kingdom

Mybedroomdoorswingsopen, snatching me from my perfect dream of the handsome man who gave me my first ever kiss. Dante. I lick my lips, I can still taste him. A smile begins to spread on my face, but falls when my dad walks in.

My Dad looks pale as the door bounces off the wall. His frantic eyes meet mine as I sit up, clutching my blanket to my chest. “Quick, I need you to hide. Do not come out no matter what. Not until the sun rises and it’s silent. Promise me.” I’d never seen him so scared before as he closes my bedroom door with shaky hands. He rushes me towards my wardrobe and pulls out the back panel I used to play hide and seek in, before kissing me on the forehead and guiding me into the small space. “What’s happening?” I whisper as loud bangs causes our front door to rattle on its hinges.

My dad doesn’t answer but puts his finger to his lips and mimes ‘Love you’ before putting the panel back and coating me in darkness. Hangers slide along the metal rail as he makes my clothes look undisturbed.

The sound of my bedroom door smashes open and I cover my ears to drown out the shouting, but my hands aren’t enough. My dad’s cries fill my head. The thumps and his grunts tell me he is being hit continuously. I uncover my ears and try to peek through the tiny gap left in the panel, but the wardrobe door is shut so I can’t see anything.

“She’s not here. She disappeared with Lilly years ago.” I know he’s talking about me and my mum, but I don’t understandwhy?Who are these men?

Curling into myself, leaning my head onto my knees as I wait in the cramped space. I try not to let any sound escape me. My mum’s voice is in my head told me to be brave. She will always be nearby if I ever need her, but where is she now? She left me years ago, but we never stayed in contact.

For the last few weeks, my dad has been acting differently and disappearing after work for a couple of hours. I thought he was dating or avoiding me so I never pushed as hard as I could have. Did he know where she was the whole time and not tell me? He hadn’t mentioned her by name to me for a while so surely that can’t be it. The sounds of crashing around my room pull me from my thoughts, it sounds as though it's being torn apart, a glass smashing and I imagine the lamp on my bedside table shattered on the ground.

“We’re not stupid, this room has been used, recently. She has to be here,” a deep voice says from outside. My heart races and sweat runs down my temple.

“I kept it untouched since she left. She isn’t here.” My dad pleads with the unknown man, I lean forward to hear more.

More light drifts through the gaps in the panel and I stay deathly still. My hand over my mouth, not making a sound as a man moves things around inside my wardrobe, his hands just inches away from me. He yanks pieces of my clothing out, throwing them around. I hear the tiny clattering of hangers on the floorand squeeze my eyes shut while counting down from ten in my mind as a tear escapes my eye and falls down my cheek.

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