Page 69 of Just You & Me

"Momma?" Bug's voice is small, making me feel even worse. She should be loud, excited, and happy. Not worrying about her adult mother and uncertain of the future. "Are we moving?"

"Yes, baby." My answer makes her instantly burst into tears. "I started packing yesterday since we can't be in this house after next Friday."

"I don't want to leave!" She tugs her hands away from me like she can't stand to even touch me. Moving in the past has never had her acting like this.

"Layla, it will be awesome! We’re moving to Maine. It will be so pretty, you’ll see!" I actually have no clue, because I don't have a fucking plan.

"I don't want another home!"

I frown, not liking the way she's yelling and shifting away from me. "I'll find us an even better house, I swear."

"It's not about the house! I want my friends. I love them, Mommy! Please don't take me away from them!"

Openly crying now, I reach for her. "Bug I—"

"No!" she screams and jumps from the counter all on her own.

"Layla! You can't do that!" Her leap made her and my damn heart stumble.

"And you can't take me away! We love them, Mom, I know it!"

I go silent. My child just told me I love the guys. I can't even fucking deny it. Bug runs off to her room, sobbing and probably cursing me for taking her away from the best family I could have ever given her.

* * *

I run oil through the ends of my curled hair, trying really damn hard not to cry again. Glancing in the mirror, my eyes are still red and puffy, but I can't put makeup on my eyeballs. Icanattempt not to let my makeup wash away in another fit of emotions. I went light with the mascara just in case, though, because my bitch face seems to be malfunctioning lately.

Sigh.

Nights are becoming colder and colder, so for dinner at the guys’ house tonight, I chose my favorite pair of ripped jeans and a simple tight black T-shirt. I don't have the energy for much else anyway. Fuzzy socks are a must. Some part of me should be happy.

Fluffing my hair around my shoulders, I eye the bright blonde roots coming in and sigh again. My bedroom is bare when I trudge through and grab my booties. I hate it. I hate the fact that I'm taking us away from the best place we have ever lived. Like Layla said, though; it's not the house. It's our people.

My eyes start burning again. "Shit," I hiss and slam my shoes into the light switch. Darkness behind me and silence ahead, just like my damn life. Running from my past with absolutely no idea or hint of what's coming next.

Layla isn't speaking to me for the first time ever. It's supposed to be Bug and me against the world, yet it seems like it's Bug and the world against me now. Ireallydon't know what to do.

I'm surprised to see Layla ready to go and sitting on the couch with her shoes on. "You ready to go, Layla?" All I get is a nod in response before she wanders over to the front door. "Okay," I whisper, and grab my keys.

Thankfully, she lets me strap her into her car seat, but I can't even get her eyes to look my way. I feel like the worst mother, but also like this is the only option. Maybe one day she will understand why I'm ruining the only life we have wanted to live.

Fuck. Even theMoanasoundtrack on the way to Jude and JJ's house doesn't shake her out of her silence. I know for a fact that as soon as we get there, Layla will finally open up and enjoy her time with the guys and Gabby.

They have been wildly supportive since my breakdown last Saturday. Whatever they heard in my voice during my story had them finally realizing they wouldn't be able to convince me to stay. There is nothing in this world I wouldn't give up to keep my daughter safe. I'm just really struggling with the fact that it seems to be her sacrifice, too.

I'm basically forcing her to say goodbye to her found family. And if I'm being honest, my found family too. Because no matter how many times I try to freeze my heart, my guys melt any frost I manage to chill it with.

They have all been around the past few days in between their own lives to help us pack and try to bridge the gap between Layla and me. I’ve been thankful every time they make my little one smile. It still breaks my heart that I can’t, though. I have also stopped avoiding their loving touches and kisses. Something about themhearingme and truly understanding me and my reasoning blew past all my excuses to stay away.

I love them. I love them so much.

I won’t say that I'm one of those fictional girls who feels like they need to leave to keep her men safe. I'm not. It's just... Layla comes first. And I know they won’t be able to keep her safe.

I choose a broken heart over a monster taking my baby away.

They understand now. We have to go. And it's the final thing that made me fall in love with Jude, Jackson, Marcus, and Leo. Theyknownow. Theyunderstand.Running is the only option that will work.

Pulling into their driveway, I'm confused as to why Tate's car is here. I hop out at the same time Jude steps out of the front door. "Hey, baby girl!"