Page 30 of Beyond The Barre

Scarlett hadn’t realised how much those sorts of comments had affected her. How the food demands and constant pressuring had formed her into a woman who, without dance, felt worthless.

But remaining in the ballet company had not been an option. Her body had protested the long, gruelling hours, which in turn had spiked her anxiety that if she couldn’t dance she couldn’t be successful or happy doing anything else.

In meditation, she had opened her mind to other possibilities. Ballet was still her number-one passion and she found joy in teaching her young students moves and routines. These girls were flourishing and finding true joy in not only their dance classes but other activities such as soccer, netball, and academics.

With the knowledge of her wounds and a deep desire to improve her mental health and her life, Scarlett continued to work hard to become a better version of herself.

She stayed in her position, cross-legged on the floor, while the other participants packed up and left. She mentally ran through her day’s schedule of teaching classes and errands to run. All that would wait until after she’d had breakfast with Chloe.

As the last student left, Scarlett rolled up her mat and gathered her things.

“You did really well this morning,” Chloe said as she met her at the door.

“Thanks,” she replied. “I feel really good today.”

“You look good too.” Chloe touched her arm where the muscles had become very defined and strong.

“Thanks.” Scarlett was grateful for the compliment and no longer felt the need to shy away from positive feedback. Through therapy and mindfulness exercises she had been able to bust through some of her trauma and not let anxiety and self-doubt take over.

“I don’t know about you but I could smash an eggs benedict.”

Scarlett’s stomach agreed loudly, and they both laughed as they headed up Maple Street towards Meredith’s Café.

They waved hello to Meredith as they sat down at their usual table.

“How’s therapy going?” Chloe asked quietly.

“Really good, thanks. Definitely found some wounds from my childhood.” Her issues with being criticised and not being good enough had started at a very young age. Although she knew her family and teachers were doing the best they could with the knowledge they had, some of their words and actions had left a deep mark on Scarlett. Now that she recognised them, however, she was healing and building up the self-confidence she had been lacking.

A line to order started to form as the morning rush began. “My turn to queue.” Scarlett rose from the table and joined the line, stepping forward as a man was also joining.

“Sorry.” Scarlett stepped back and looked up to see who she was cutting in front of.

Linc looked just as surprised to see her as she felt. After a moment, he blinked rapidly and waved for Scarlett to take the spot in front of him. She hadn’t seen him since the wedding, and seeing him now brought up all the feelings she had been avoiding.

“Thanks.” She took a step forward and, not wanting to be rude, faced him. “How are you?”

Linc bobbed his head. “Good. Fine, thanks, and you?”

“Pretty good, yeah,” she replied.

She pretended to read the menu on the wall when all she really wanted was to fall into his arms and kiss him.

Her turn came and Scarlett quickly ordered, paid, and took her table number. Then she turned to Linc. “It was nice seeing you.”

His smile was unconvincing. “You too.”

Scarlett slinked back to her seat. Was that how things were going to be now? Awkward as hell? In a town as small as Maleny, they were bound to cross paths every now and then. She didn’t want to feel this much … what was this feeling? Regret? Heartbreak?

Chloe reached over and gave her shoulder a gentle rub. “Is that the first time you’ve seen him?”

She nodded.

“How do you feel?”

Scarlett answered before she could think through her reply. “I miss him.”

Chloe turned in her chair and looked at Linc as he collected his takeaway coffee and walked back past them. He spared her a quick glance as he moved toward the door.

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