Page 202 of Grand Love

Nina

Twelve weeks later.

Bending at the knee,I watch the tear that falls from my eye, as it seeps down into the rain-soaked grass. So many people in this world don’t deserve the lives they live, yet good people can have their lives cut short in a single second. The only crime Joey Wilson ever committed was caring for me and my son, and just as he started to let me go, his life was ended.

I haven’t told Mason about Lance and what he did. And I won’t. Not now and not ever. Mason has been hurt more than any of us, and if I can hold on to some of the pain myself, carry it for him so that it doesn’t take him down again, I will let it fester within me for an eternity. What’s worse than knowing I have to keep something from him, though, is we now have to watch as Scarlet tends to a broken heart as Lance faces sentencing. I lie awake every night hoping he gets the time he deserves for taking an innocent life, yet my tears fall in hope that he can come home and make everything right for her.

Setting down the garland of flowers I had made, I place my pale hand on top. “I hope you’re okay, Joe.” My voice wavers as more tears start to fall. “I miss you. I miss our runs—although I’m still not allowed to do that. I miss you always knowing where Ellis’s dummy is when I can’t find it.” I laugh, pursing my lips. “I miss having you to talk to about everything and nothing. I want to hear about the picture you’re working on and the random facts you’d tell me about some hotshot photographer I’ve never heard of. I want to chew your ear off whilst you pretend to listen to me.” I inhale a lungful of air. “I’m sorry this happened to you, Joey. You didn’t deserve it.” I run my hand through the damp soil, swallowing thickly as I fight to gather my words. “I hope you’re at peace. With your mum and Jasper.” I bow my head, feeling so much remorse and regret over how everything unfolded. “Thank you. Thank you so much for being there when I needed you. It wasn’t long enough but I won’t ever forget it, or you.”

Vinny steps forward as I rise to my feet, grasping my elbow as I step back from the grave. I wasn’t able to go to Joey’s funeral, but the girls, Mason and the boys all went, which I’m grateful for. I’ve been home from hospital for four weeks, and it wasn’t until Mason told me we were going away this morning that I knew I had to come out here. I’d been putting it off, but I couldn’t leave the country before I did this.

“I’m okay, Vin,” I tell him, pulling my arm away and smiling up at him. He holds out the umbrella and I step under it.

“You ready, love?”

I nod my head with a smile, walking with him back to the car. “Where are we going?”

“You can ask me as many times as you want. I’m not going to tell you.”

I slide into the car and strap myself in, looking at Vinny when he gets into the driver’s seat. “Where did everyone go this morning?”

“They’re exactly where they need to be.”

My eyes follow the graveyard until it’s out of sight, and I smile to myself as I stare out the window at the rolling hills. Joey would love it here.

“I’m not stupid, Vinny,” I say, righting myself in my seat. “Mason was more than obvious last night—”

“Whoa! I don’t want to know, thank you.”

I chuckle. “I didn’t mean…” I shake my head. “He brought me flowers, told me he couldn’t see me and that he had to go sleep in the spare room.”

His eyebrows lift in surprise. “He did?”

“Yep.” I grin, excitement swirling low in my stomach. “I’m nervous, Vinny. I’m the sort to fall flat on my face.”

“Mason won’t let that happen.” He looks over at me. “I won’t let that happen.”

I swallow, trying not to get emotional again. “I know I told you back along that I wanted to meet my dad. I asked you for the information you had.” I roll my lips, watching him thoughtfully. “I don’t want it anymore. I don’t want to know him.”

He flicks his eyes over at me before looking back to the road.

“I don’t have a good enough reason, but I know that he isn’t a man I want nor need in my life. He hasn’t been here when it mattered, so why let him be here now?”

“I can understand that.” He nods.

“Will you tell me about him, though?”

I watch as he tightens his grip on the steering wheel. “What do you want to know?”

“Is he a good man?” I ask, simply.

He hesitates for a second too long, telling me exactly what I thought I already knew. “Yes, he’s a good man,” he tells me.

“Okay.” I turn and look back out the window with a small smile. “I still don’t want to know him.”

I drop the conversation and pull out my phone, allowing Vinny a moment to process the lie he’s told me. And it only makes me love him all the more for it.

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