Page 13 of Black Mark's Heart

"Please?" Darius pleaded, his mouth brushing mine. "Please, Mora." His mouth brushed over mine again, his fingers pressing into my back where he held me. "I love you."

Darius firmed his mouth to mine and kissed me, slowly and deeply. I couldn't deny I loved him, we both knew I did. I desired him like he was oxygen, and I wanted to be with him.

As he picked me up and carried me to the bed, I promised myself it was goodbye. We both needed this to truly end what happened between us. We loved each other, and it shouldn't end with anger and resentment. I could make love to him tonight, walk away from him tomorrow, knowing he loved me as much as I loved him and, if it were possible, we would be together in a heartbeat. It just wasn't possible.

When Darius went to undress me, I stopped his hands. "Wait. Turn off the light please?"

Darius frowned, "Why? The light has never bothered you before now."

I shied away from him, holding my singlet slightly away from my body. I'd lost enough weight that it exaggerated my growing abdomen. I was terrified what it would mean for Darius to know, especially now that he wanted to be my lover.

"Please, Dare. I would feel more comfortable."

Darius looked me over. "Have you been self-harming again?"

I shook my head.

Darius lifted my chin so he could see my face clearly. "I want to see you, Mora."

I pulled my chin from his grasp. "You ask everything from me, Dare, and I give it every time. I'm asking for you to turn the light off just this once, and you can't even do that." I shoved him away as hard as I could. "Get out, Dare! Get out of my life, out of my heart, just get out!" I yelled at him.

Darius grabbed my upper arms, holding me to him as I near collapsed under the weight of my emotions. I felt him reach out and, a moment later, darkness descended upon us.

"I want to hate you," I sobbed to his chest. "I want to hate you with all my heart. Why can't I hate you?"

Darius didn't answer. He pulled my top over my head and then knelt to push my pants to my feet. He stayed absolutely silent. I cried. Darius kissed his way over my thighs and hips. When he kissed over my abdomen, I cried harder, threading my fingers through his thick hair and holding him there, letting him kiss his child through my skin.

"Dare..." I wanted to tell him that his child grew inside of me and that on Monday, I was going for the first scan and was going to be able to see our child for the first time. I wanted to ask what names he would choose, what color he thinks we should paint the nursery, or what furniture we should buy. I wanted to ask him all those things, but I knew I couldn't. "Be gentle."

Darius stood up, removing his own clothes. "I know, Mora. I'm going to make love to you, because I need you to feel how much I do love you."

When Darius took me in his arms again, he lay me back on the bed beneath him and I spread my legs, welcoming him to me. His monster cock slipped easily into my opening, my body ready and willing. I felt Darius smile where he kissed across my collarbone. "She finally learned."

He pressed into me. I gripped his shoulders at the discomfort, taking God’s name in vain. Darius chuckled and captured my nipple, flicking his mouth across it. My thighs opened wider automatically, and he rocked forward to sheathe fully within me. Darius released the most glorious groan. He kissed me, slowly and deeply, letting my body adjust to him.

"I need you in my life, Mora," Darius murmured. "Be mine. We'll make this work somehow."

I didn't answer. I couldn't. My emotions were conflicted and too raw to deal with this. I closed my eyes and just enjoyed being with him, right here, right now. I could have this.

***

In the early hours of the morning, I woke in Darius's arms, his heavy breath blowing across my naked shoulder. For a moment, I smiled, enjoying being there again. I couldn't stay. His arms had lost the safety they used to hold. I moved forward as if rolling away. Darius rolled back, releasing me. I slipped from the bed and dressed, packing my bag quietly.

I stood, looking at Darius sleeping peacefully, a smile playing across his face. Six years ago, I'd spent my first night with Darius and snuck out while he slept. In two months, it would be a year since he walked back into my life. What a roller coaster ride the last twelve months had been.

Closing the door behind me quietly, I made my way down a floor and knocked at Ewan's door. I waited patiently; he'd be sleeping. It was unfair of me to come calling after spending the night with another guy, but I needed somewhere to hang out until our flight was due to leave. Ewan opened the door half asleep and half naked, just his sweat pants hanging from his hips. His light brown hair was a mess and hanging in his chocolate brown eyes as he looked me over.

"You let him stay, didn't you?"

I nodded. As soon as I did, I felt my stomach revolt. I pushed Ewan out of the way and ran to his toilet. He held my hair until I stopped puking, waited until I washed my face, and turned to face him. I looked at my feet, ashamed.

"Did you tell him about the baby?"

I shook my head.

Ewan used a finger to lift my chin. "You need to make a choice, Mora. The next time he sees you, there will be no hiding you're pregnant."

"I made the choice when I snuck out of the room just now," I answered evenly. "He can't give me what I want. I need to leave him behind and focus on being a single mother."

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