Page 3 of The Christmas Exchange

Julian was silent, as per usual, just watching Miles and me as we were the only two speaking. They were almost polar opposites, the perfect yin and yang. Miles was more of an extrovert and the life of the party. Julian was quiet. He sat back and observed the world moving around him. They coexisted perfectly together.

And not to mention both of them had always been nice to look at. They had both aged like fine wine as the three of us were approaching our thirties. More mature, filled out, and manly. They had a way of making my breath catch in my throat as my mouth went drier than the damn desert.

But then again… they both seemed to always have that effect on me.

One of the bartenders called Julian over and he left the table for a moment to grab the pitcher and another glass. Miles turned to me, his bright blue eyes meeting mine.

“So, how have you been, Rae? What’s new in your life?”

I shrugged as Julian came back to us and filled both of their mugs before handing me one. “I’ve been good. Just really busy with work. There isn’t honestly anything new. I’ve had a few projects I’ve been working on that have taken up a lot of my time.”

Miles cocked his head to the side as mischief danced across his face. “How’s the dating scene in the city?”

I snorted, almost spitting out my beer. “That’s a better suited question for someone who’s actually in the scene. I’m not dating anymore, nor do I have any plans to do so anytime soon.”

“Why?”

Julian’s voice took me by surprise and I turned to look over at him. His dark eyes were trained on me, giving absolutely nothing away.

“I don’t really have time to date right now. I don’t need the added distractions and, honestly, after the few dates I did go on, I’ve discovered there aren’t as many fish in the ocean as you’d think.” I paused and looked between them. “Okay, it’s both of your turn now. Enough about me.”

I turned to Miles as Julian simply lifted his mug and took a sip of his beer, not offering to be the one who went first.

“Can’t complain about anything,” Miles replied with a shrug. “I’ve also been keeping myself busy with work and have to agree with dating. Maybe I’m just picky, but I haven’t found anyone worth my time or interest.” He glanced at Julian. “What about you? How’s your glorious life abroad?”

“It’s fine,” he said with indifference. “I’m considering moving back to the States.”

My eyes widened and I stared at him for a moment. “I thought you loved Italy.”

“Oh, I do. I think it’s time for me to move on, though. I’ve been there for a considerable amount of time now.”

I was honestly shocked by it. Julian didn’t speak much about it, but he was living the dream over there in the beautiful city he lived in. It had been some time since we last spoke, so maybe there was more to it than I had realized. I was curious, though. It seemed to be out of nowhere, but Julian didn’t do things without carefully considering every option and angle.

“So, you just want to move back here because you’ve been there for so long?” Miles questioned him as he slung his arm over the tops of my shoulders. “Seems strange, if you ask me.”

“Is it a crime to miss my family and friends?”

Miles snorted. “You have friends other than the two of us?”

Julian stared blankly at him. “Not really.” He directed his gaze to me and there was a slow, steady fire burning in his dark irises. “Unfortunately, the two of you are the only ones who have managed to keep my attention long enough.”

My tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth. I lifted my glass of beer to my lips and took a long drink of it. “Where would you move if you came back?”

Julian shrugged. “I haven’t decided yet, but when I do, you’ll know.”

Miles traced invisible patterns on my bicep. His body was warm against mine and I was acutely aware of how close he was to me. I was pressed against his side with his thigh pressed against mine. My mind traced every edge that was touching him. Warmth built in my stomach and I wasn’t sure if it was because of how Julian was still looking at me or how my body relaxed against Miles.

They were both bad for my health, which is why I never allowed myself to cross any lines with either of them when we were in high school. That was a partial lie. I did share one drunken kiss with Miles, which I was fairly certain he didn’t even remember. Our teenage years were messy for all three of us, trying to figure out where we were headed in life.

I valued their friendships more than anything. They were always protective, making sure I was safe. I was terrified of losing both of them, especially with how long we had been friends. They were deeply embedded into my life, even if we didn’t see each other as often now. If I ever uttered a word of being attracted to either one of them, it could have gone terribly. That rejection was something I never wanted to experience. So, the three of us always remained friends.

Even after I went to visit Julian three years ago…

We swore we would never speak of that night again. It was simply a mistake. Another drunken kiss, although neither of us were drunk on alcohol. We were caught up in the moment. In the romantic air of Italy one evening. As quickly as it happened, it ended.

That was the one time I allowed myself to show any type of attraction to him. I made the mistake of initiating a kiss—one he returned passionately, before he abruptly pulled away from me and told me he had a girlfriend. Things were a touch awkward after that, but we were able to maintain our friendship and pretend like it never happened.

He and his girlfriend broke up about a month later, but even then, it didn’t change things between us. Things were the way they were supposed to be between the three of us. And in this moment, it just felt good to be back together again.Just like old times…

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