Page 4 of The Naughty List

Her eye’s twitching and I’m biting the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing. It’s not that I’m an actual maniacal asshole; it’s just that this is a game we always play. She purposely makes mistakes or shows up late just to piss me off and make me look incompetent and I make her life difficult in return. We both get a free pass for telling each other off and don’t go running to HR to solve our disagreements. I contemplate giving her a lecture on being a responsible adult but feel I’ve pushed her buttons enough for the day.

“Will there be anything else, Miss Flowers?” I say in my sweetest voice.

“No, sir.” She says the words through gritted teeth before marching out and slamming my office door.

* * *

“Well, look who it is, Miss Fifty Shades of Brown.” I’m surprised to find Kate sitting at the bar at my local watering hole by the office. After her mere meltdown at work today, I figured she’d be tending to her car. She slowly turns her gaze toward me. “Whoa, don’t go spitting green vomit all over me,” I say, raising my hands in the air.

“Shouldn’t you be sneaking into people’s houses right now, stealing presents and destroying the happiness of innocent young children?” She leers at me.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I wave to flag down the bartender. “I’ll take a vodka soda. Belvedere, please.”

“Please tell me you get that it was a reference to The Grinch? It’s the holidays; you’d think that you’d be a little nicer this time of year like the rest of humanity but my guess is your heart hasn’t grown three sizes yet.” She motions to the bartender for another round for herself.

“It’s the holidays? Hadn’t noticed.” I shrug. It’s a lie, I noticed, but I don’t like to celebrate them. They’re not as fun and jolly when you’re alone.

“Yeah, what gave it away? The lights, trees, holiday music, and general merriment?”

“Man, you’re extra snarky today. You get a fresh batch of bitch hormones or something? Must be something about you redheads.” I shake my head and thank the bartender as he hands me my drink. I go to take a sip but I’m startled when Kate slams her hands down on the bar, making me jump and spill my drink a little.

“My God, can’t you just let some things slide? Why do you always have to be a massive prick all the damn time?”

“You don’t make it easy, sweetheart.” I wink at her and I know she fucking hates when I flirt with her. I’m sure as far as she’s concerned it’s just me trying to piss her off but the reality is, it’s genuine. There’s something about her copper hair and bright-blue eyes with those overly full pouty lips. I catch myself lingering a little too long on her lips as she glares at my remark. “Okay, fine. I’m sorry. I’ll be nicer. But only if you tell me why on God’s green earth you’re wearing that outfit.” I can’t hold back my laughter any longer.

“You told me to see if anyone had an extra outfit because I wasn’t allowed to go home, and the only person who had extra clothes was Marge.” She downs her second cocktail and motions for another.

“Marge!” I laugh even harder. “Well, for what it’s worth, you wear Marge’s clothes much better than she does.” She doesn’t respond, just smiles as the bartender hands her another cocktail.

“Hey, could we each get a double shot of tequila?” she asks him and he nods.

“Whoa, what’s up?” I ask as she dives into the drink.

“Like I said, the holidays.”

“Shitty for you too, huh?” She shrugs but I’m curious so I pry. “Tell me about what’s going on.”

“Seriously? Are you just going to make fun of me the entire time?”

“Nope,” I say, raising my right hand. “Hand to God.” She stares back at her glass for a moment before letting out an audible exhale. The bartender is back and places the double shot down in front of us.

“I’m gonna need this first,” she says, grabbing the shot. She doesn’t wait for me, just takes the shot and sucks on the lime it came with. “Shit!” she says, slapping her hand down on the bar before coughing.

“You’re a natural.”

“Anyway, I took tomorrow and Friday off to drive home to my family’s house. They live a few hours away, in central Illinois, but now, since my car broke down and it got towed, I have no way to get home. So thank you!” she says, reaching over and grabbing the second shot right from my hand and downing it.

“What the hell? What do you mean thanks to me?”

“My car wouldn’t start at the bakery so I had to leave it and of course it was a fifteen-minute parking spot so I went back at lunch, it had already been towed and you wouldn’t let me leave work early to pick it up. I called a few mechanics and because it’s the holidays, nobody had a spot open for me, except one place but they had to have my car by tonight. Soooo, I’m shit outta luck. But the funny thing is, I don’t even have the money to get it fixed anyway.” The liquor is starting to hit her. I can see her eyes are a little blurry and her movements are a little delayed and exaggerated as she speaks.

“Shit,” I murmur and I really do feel like dick. “Kate, I’m so—”

“Kate?” she says loudly. “Kate? I thought I was Miss Flowers.” She barks out her own name, clearly trying to do an impression of me. I can’t help but laugh which in turn makes her laugh.

We spend the next hour laughing and drinking, something I never thought I’d be doing with her. It feels nice, great actually.

“So are you close to your family?”

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