Page 92 of Live To Tell

He shakes his head but says nothing.

The moment the door closes, Holly’s sitting up, cross-legged on her bed, hugging a sequined cushion.

“What is that look for?” I ask.

“It’s so cute!” she enthuses, and my look darkens enough to tone her down. “Oh, but Leif is such a sweetheart.”

I frown. “Did you want Leif’s attentions?”

“No! I’m very happy with Chase’s attention.”

“Hmm. When that suits him.”

Her smile grows coy. “All his attention.”

“Stop,” I say firmly and hold up a hand, palm out. “I’ve informed you in the past that I am not the correct individual to discuss your activities with.”

I sit on my bed too, still aware of my racing heart, Leif’s earthy scent covering me. I smooth my hair and Holly watches.

“If you ever want to talk to somebody about guys, you can speak to me. Three must be a lot to deal with.”

“I don't 'deal with' all three guys at the same time.”

Holly's cheeks—weirdly—turn vaguely pink. “I meant their different personalities and how to deal with guys in general.”

“Yes. Why? What do you think I meant?”

“You know.”

“No, I do not know, or I wouldn't ask.” Holly mouths 'sex' at me. I think. “What?”

She sighs heavily. “Alright. I know you’d never kissed anybody before you came to Thornwood and thought you might want advice.”

“Are you suggesting I've no concept of intimate relationships?” I ask. “There's a biologically simplicity—part A fits into slot B. Don't allow unwanted reproduction.”

Holly's eyes go wide. “Intimacy is more than the biology, Violet. There's the emotion and talking things through.”

“Oh, yes. The two things I excel in,” I say with a hint of sarcasm. “As Leif made clear tonight. Holly, I am perfectly capable and happy to navigate this myself.”

She nods and falls silent.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” I ask as a smile snakes across her face.

“Part A. That’s funny, Violet. Sounds like assembling flat-pack furniture.”

“Haven't we established I don't wish to speak about this?”

“And you have uh... experience of part A?” she continues rather impertinently and coyly. “I mean, not tonight, obviously, since I walked in and—”

“Good grief, Holly!”

Since when did we become girls who shared such privacy? But... if I speak to Holly about ‘guy things’, she’ll come to me for help once Chase hurts her. That I do want.

She looks at me expectantly. “Isn't part A a prominent part of relationships, particularly around our age group?”

She laughs again. “That didn't answer my question.”

“I believe I did.”

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