Page 68 of Live To Tell

“I’m fine. I’ll clean up and rest. Wanted to wash some of the blood off before parading around the academy.” He laughs to himself, the sound quiet and hollow.

“I know you’re not fine, Grayson,” I whisper, and fold the towel to dab at his knuckles. “I’ll always know when you’re not ‘fine’.”

“Stay out of my mind,” he warns. “I’m respecting your boundaries, you respect mine.”

“Good grief.” I pause and place the bloodied towel on my lap. “I do not invade my friends’ heads. Grayson, I know you’re not fine currently, just as I knew you weren’t okay the night we spoke in my room.”

“I’m that transparent?” He takes the towel and starts dabbing at his bloodied nose. “Nice self-control, by the way.”

“I’ve repeatedly told you that I care for you, Grayson, and that the endearment prevents me attacking you.” He ignores me and continues wiping his face. “I struggle when I’m around you because something’s changed.”

“What do you mean?”

I meet his eyes. “Since I took your blood, I’ve a connection to your emotions. All evening, I experienced something odd that made no sense—dread. I’m rarely worried for my own safety, but fear for my life took hold even though nothing threatened me. Now I’m with you, that’s stronger. You’re the one with fear for your life.”

Grayson’s mouth parts as he stares at me. “You feel me in your blood... my blood?”

“Now yours mingles with mine? I suspect so, which is rather inconvenient. I’ve enough issues dealing with my own emotions without being burdened with another’s.”

“Whoa.” His long fingers lace through mine.

“Another reason to keep away from you, I suppose.” Yet I remain connected to him, not pulling my hand away.

“I can see how that’d make you really pissed.”

“Oh, yes. I’m extremely angry right now. Deep, deep down, not at the surface ready to explode,” I add when worry crosses his face. “You’re hurting, frightened, and you feel helpless.”

Grayson’s jaw goes rigid, and he pulls away his fingers, turning his face to one side. “I’m not helpless. Or frightened. I can deal with shit.” He looks back. “I’ve dealt with this shit for years.”

“Alone. You can’t do this on your own anymore.”

He scoffs. “Violet Blackwood telling me that dealing with things ‘alone’ isn’t the correct way?”

“Am I alone anymore, Grayson?”

Grayson stares ahead again and his hands bunch on his knees. “No.”

“And neither are you,” I say quietly. “You have three friends who’ll help. I’ve told you for weeks that I intend to help you and if that includes killing Josef, I will.” His eyes go wide. “Actually, forget that. I’m killing him, whatever. He threatens a lot in my life.”

“Way to sound like your father.”

“Josef wants to kill you.” I don’t need Grayson’s blood beating through my heart to experience his spike of that fear I’m speaking about. “Josef wants to kill you due to your actions at the warehouse. You betrayed him by not doing what he demanded.”

Grayson turns back to me, and I touch his injured cheek, accepting and not rejecting the surge of affection that comes from within him. From within myself.

“Josef wants to kill me because I betrayed him, but not at the warehouse. He knows that I love you and would never harm you—that he could never persuade me to hurt Dorian’s precious child, who he wants killed.” His throat moves, eyes shining. “And Josef’s correct. I’ve protected you and I would again, down to my very last breath. Until he stops my heart for good.”

“He won’t get the chance,” I say quietly. “I already gave Josef one. No more.”

Grayson’s shoulders slump. “I’m lucky I escaped with a warning tonight. The bastard said he’ll ‘catch up properly’ soon.”

“You don’t know where Josef is now? Where he’s living?” He shakes his head. “Then we need Dorian’s help.”

Grayson gives a bitter laugh. “Oh yeah, Dorian’s all for helping me.”

“No. Listen. Dorian wants to find Josef, and if Josef wants to find you, that’s my father’s chance. Dorian will use anything and anyone he can in order to get what he wants. Doesn’t matter if he likes the person or not.”

“Every time you tell me more about Dorian, the worse this becomes. I’d hoped you’d tell me the man has redeeming qualities.”

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