I stride to the mirror and give myself a pep talk.
“What is wrong with you, Penelope? You’re a successful actress. You’ve been in the same room with gorgeous men before. You can do this. Focus on the movie and ignore everything else.”
Taking more deep breaths, I flush the toilet, so it seems like I used it, and wash my hands. “I’ve got this.”
On the way back, I find Nora’s room and check on her. She’s such a beautiful little girl.
I’ve never had the urge to become a mom. It was off the table with Drew because he didn’t want kids, and I was okay with that. I guess I’ve never seen myself as maternal.
My career has always been my baby. I’ve spent so long nurturing it, letting it consume me, and that’s been fine for me.
But seeing Brent with Nora over the past few days, it makes me rethink things. Maybe Idowant to be a mom one day. Maybe it would be nice to slow down, move out of the city, and make a real life for myself. Somewhere where people know me, not for brands I wear or the people I date, but for who I truly am at my core. And honestly, I’m not even sure I know who that is.
Strip away the makeup, glamor, and money, and whoisPenelope Maxwell?
That’s a question I’ve never asked myself.
However, something about Winterberry, Brent and Nora, the inn, and this Christmas has me thinking about the answer for the first time.
Sneaking out of Nora’s room so I don’t wake her, I head back down the hall to the living room and find Brent throwing popcorn in the air, catching the pieces in his mouth.
“You’ve got skills, Mr. Harrison.” I laugh as I take my seat back on the couch. “Nora is sound asleep with all of her stuffed animals.”
“Those stuffed animals will be the death of me. She has to have them in a certain spot every night and I have to kiss each one good night. If she wasn’t so cute, I’d say not a chance.”
“You’d do anything for that little girl.”
“I would. She has me wrapped around her little finger. When her mom died, it was really hard for her, and before we moved her, it was just us. I tried to make up for that loss as much as I could.” His chest rises and falls rapidly with the admission. I want to put my hand on his arm, something to let him know that I’m here, but I don’t want to interrupt him.
“Eventually I realized I couldn’t take that place and instead we began to create our own routines and memories. When we moved back here, it was the best decision I could’ve made. My parents love her more than life and it’s filled a huge hole for her.”
“Was it a hard decision to move back here?” I ask hesitantly. I don’t want to say the wrong thing and have him shut down.
“Yes and no. We loved our little Jersey Shore beach town, but I knew Nora needed her family and the people of this town. They may drive me crazy but they’re really good people. Everyone looks out for each other, and you don’t find that everywhere.”
“You definitely don’t. I never experienced that until I arrived here. I was a stranger to everyone just a little while ago and I’ve been welcomed with open arms.”
“Yeah, I’m not sure what you have done but everyone loves you. I think they’re going to miss you when you leave.”
Just the mention of me leaving Winterberry makes my stomach constrict, and a profound sadness settles over my heart. In such a short time, I’ve become attached to this town.
I know I need to go back to my real life, but I’m going to be sad to go.
I don’t want to ruin the night, so I drop it before the mood shifts.
“Shall we get back to Buddy the Elf?” I ask, trying hard to sound cheerier than I feel.
I can’t help but stare at the dark stubble on his jaw, those blue piercing eyes, and those kissable lips. The way his chest bulges beneath his black t-shirt is enticing.
He’s a perfect specimen of a man.
In Hollywood, so many men have their eyebrows waxed and foreheads Botoxed. They wear designer everything and care excessively about their appearance. It takes alotto be the prettier one in the relationship.
I went through it with Drew.
But Brent? He’s all man.
And I’m here for it.