Page 25 of Prove You Wrong

Scott checks some papers. ‘Can you cover here on Bonfire night? I’ve been given an opportunity I can’t refuse.’

‘Sure. But tell me more another time, I’d better go and get geared up.’

***

My motorbike is my first love; I never feel more centred than when I’m letting rip on an open road. But today, I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me. I’d thought the ride would give me a good chance to get my head straight, but what with concentrating on rush hour traffic and then Ella’s naked body flashing through my mind as frequently as the cat’s eyes on the hard shoulder, it’s takingall my ability to make the drop-off and get back in one piece.

My bed is calling out to me as I arrive home, especially after crashing at The Bull while Scott was away.I always do to help keep an eye on the place, but the living quarters leave a lot to be desired. After working extra shifts to help Scott out and sleeping badly, followed by a three-hour round trip on the motorway, I’m wiped.

As I enter the flat, I’m already stripping off my leather jacket and dreaming of a shower.

‘Hi, you back yet?’ I call out loudly to Chunk, as I kick off my shoes.

‘Hey man, in here.’

Chunk is sitting on the floor, surrounded by notebooks, a laptop screen shining blankly from the side. His dirty-blond hair mussed up from where he drags his fingers through it. His large hand dwarfs the pen he’s tapping up and down, drumming on a pad.

‘I’m not disturbing a board meeting or something, am I?’

Since leaving the military, Chunk started his own business, The Wreck, which has grown into a fully-fledged outdoor activity centre. Although he’s gifted at creating experiences for people, and his construction work on-site is exquisite, his relationship with the business-related spreadsheets and paperwork is strained.

‘Nah, I’m done with this.’ He sighs. He scrubs his hand through his hair. ‘I might head to The Wreck in a bit if you want to come? I’ve had an idea to put in a load of lights. Turn the high ropes into a night-time Christmas illuminations experience.’

Impressed, I nod at the novel idea, my brain firing as I picture it. ‘You should have done something like that for Halloween, that would’ve been scary as fuck.’

He cocks his head to the side, offering a fist out and I bump mine into it. ‘Genius. Where were youbeforeHalloween when I could have used it?’

‘Next year?’

‘You sure you don’t want to partner with me?’

This guy offers me a job with him about every two weeks. We were friends in school but lost touch when he joined the Royal Marines. Luckily for me, he’d moved back to the area and offered me some work when I needed it the most. Now my best friend, he shares his awesome flat for dirt cheap rent and regularly tries to overpay me for any odd jobs I do for him at the centre.

‘Thanks, but no. Not right now.’ I value his friendship too much to risk his livelihood. ‘Right now,I need a shower.’

‘You know there’ll always be a job for you at The Wreck, right?’

I cross my arms over my chest. ‘You know I’ve got the pub.’

He copies my move and even though he’s sat on the floor, he’s so stacked he’d be quite imposing if I didn’t know he was a giant softie.

‘That’s not a career though, dude.’ Chunk never minces his words. Life is short so he says what he means.

‘Bar work can be a career.’ I start to head towards the bathroom.

‘Yes, but it’s notyourcareer. Notyourdream. It’s your brother’s.’

What Chunk hasn’t appreciated is that if I don’t commit to a career, I can’t fail at it.

Not failing. That’s my dream.

‘I’ll work something out,’ I call over my shoulder as I shut the door behind me.

Water trickling over me, I rest my head on the cold tiles. Finally, I let thoughts of Ella devour me. I stroke my dick, recalling every moment after she waltzed, fearless and demanding, back into the pub. Like I’ve done every night since. She was un-fucking-believable.

I don’t know how or what or why, but for the first time in a very long time, I want more.

It’s no secret that after my ex ripped my heart out, I focussed on having fun and feeling good, taking nothing and no-one too seriously, especially not myself.

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