Page 53 of Alive and Wells

“No, what?”

“No, that’s not what this is. I’m not using you to get over him. You’re not my rebound guy.” Despite how dark it is, her hand finds mine on the center console. She threads our fingers and tightens. “You might know me better than anybody at this point and I just—I don’t want to be ignored. I’ve been ignored enough, and I thought you would be diff—”

Her voice breaks and, with a tight grip on the wheel, I veer to the shoulder in the nick of time to reach out and catch the first tear to roll down her cheek. The fracture in my chest splits wide open, knowing I’m responsible for making her upset.

“Don’t cry, darlin’. Please. It breaks my heart.”

“Sorry,” she apologizes, wiping the dampness from her rosy cheeks. God, I hate how often she says sorry for shit that doesn’t require apologies. Even more, I hate knowing somebody in her life made her feel like she needed to. “I’m a crier when I drink. It’s stupid—forget about it.”

She rubs her palms across her eyes, effectively wiping away the tears, while also smearing mascara around. Making her look like an adorable, drunk raccoon.

“I never meant for you to think I was ignoring you, I swear. You’re impossible to ignore. Have been since the day you showed up here—believe me, I tried. Any hope of being able to ignore you was lost the moment I saw you on the side of the road. Everything about you makes me flustered in a way I’ve never been before—my head’s all messed up when it comes to you. I know I haven’t been handling it as well as I should, and I’m sorry.”

Her knuckles rest lightly on my cheek, rubbing across my coarse facial hair. Then her lips find mine in the dark, fitting perfectly together like our mouths were made to be connected as often as possible. Though it’s not my liquor of choice, I’d drink tequila from her lips anytime.

“Can I sleep over tonight?” she whispers tentatively. As if she honestly thinks I might say no. She could ask to move in permanently, and I’d clear out half of my dresser for her tonight. I never wanted her back in her own cabin in the first place. I’ve just been so consumed with doing everything I think Ishoulddo.

“My bed is your bed, darlin’.”

“Mmm. Well, we have agreatbed.” She rests her head on the window as I pull back onto the road. “I know you drove all the way to town because I sent you dirty texts… so I’m trying to rally. But,fuck, I’m exhausted.”

“I was gearing up to come get you from the first message, and not because I wanted to take advantage of you being drunk. I’m all ears if you want to talk to me like that when you’re sober, though.”

She’s snoring lightly before I’ve even finished my sentence. Her face against the window, and my hat hung crookedly off the side of her head. I slow down for every turn and curve in the road, dodge potholes as best I can, and when I pull up the driveway, I take the longer route to avoid the bright barn lights. There’s no way I’m about to wake her up when she looks this tranquil.

I slowly peel open the passenger door, carefully slipping my hand in to keep her from falling out. With her cradled in my arms, I walk down the dark path. As I fumble with my doorknob, she stirs, mumbling something incoherent and curling in closer, so her head is tucked under my chin. I freeze in place, waiting until she’s settled before continuing to my bedroom and slowly lowering her to the bed.

Even though she’s drunk, I doubt she’d want to sleep with makeup and a body-hugging dress on. I sneak out to the bathroom and dampen a facecloth, then return to pull a T-shirt from my dresser.

“Darlin’, hey.” I brush her hair away from her face. She doesn’t even budge. On the off chance she’s just ignoring me, I add, “I’m gonna help you get ready for bed, okay?”

As expected, she doesn’t respond. This girl sleeps like the dead. With the warm cloth, I begin to wipe away the smudged mascara from her eyes. Her hand comes up once to lazily swat me away before giving up and tucking under her pillow. Once I’m as confident as I can be—given the fact I’m working under the glow from the distant bathroom light—that her makeup is cleaned up, I look at the T-shirt next to me. A million conflicting thoughts race through my mind.

Maybe she’ll be fine in the dress.

It doesn’t look like it would be too comfortable, though.

Is it creepy to change her while she’s asleep?

I’ve seen her in her bra and underwear before… in fact, she’s had her half-naked body pressed against mine before.

Finally, I give in and slip her dress straps over her shoulders, keeping a close eye on her for any signs she’s waking up. As I’m wiggling the tight dress down over her body, she mumbles something. When I look up, her eyes are half-open and staring down at me.

“I thought you might be comfier in something other than this dress,” I quickly defend myself.

She nods, lifting her hips to help me finish undressing her. I grab the T-shirt to begin searching for the head hole, when she unclasps her bra in a swift motion and flings it to the floor.

Holy shit.I swallow and quickly avert my eyes because, even in the little light, I can see a shitload more than I was planning to tonight. Not that I’m mad about it.

“Here’s a T-shirt.” I blindly hold the shirt out, waving it slightly to urge her to grab it.

“Don’t be a big baby. You can look… or touch.” There’s a soft tinge of humour in her voice. Drunk Cecily is fucking dangerous. “You promised not to ignore me, remember?”

I close my eyes and take a moment to compose myself. “Darlin’, I’m definitely not ignoring you. I’m just trying my damnedest to be the respectful man my mom raised me to be, okay?”

“Boo, no fun.” She slips the T-shirt over her head and wriggles down under the covers. “Hey, Aus?”

“Yeah?”

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