Page 136 of The Deal with the Playboy

I made sure to get a job close to my apartment so it’s within walking distance. I place my headphones over my ears and walk a block to my apartment complex, knowing Michael is following behind me. I make it to the elevator and press the button.

Once I make it to the top floor and head to my door, I see Jasper leaning against the doorframe, takeout in his hand.

My heart melts, and tears form in my eyes, because I miss him so much.

I stop in front of him and remove my pink headphones. “What are you doing here?”

My stomach growls, I swear every five minutes I’m hungry. This baby is a leech sucking up all the food, not leaving me any.

“We need to talk. Befo—”

“You can come inside,” I tell him as I type the code.

We need to speak about our plan for when this baby will arrive, and I can’t keep avoiding him.

The door beeps open and the smell of lavender hits my nostrils. My mother must have sprayed the place before she left.

She’s been staying with me, making sure I’m okay. She hasn’t mentioned anything about Jasper since I told her we’re not together, and at first it felt odd because she’s always butted her nose in my dating life. But she’s giving me the space I need right now, spending most of her days at the country club until I get off work.

My heart beats hard in my chest, I feel him walking right behind me. He sets the food on the counter, looking around at my open space apartment, then his eyes land on me.

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

“Tired and hungry,” I answer as I sit on the love seat and remove my shoes.

“I ran into Gemma three weeks ago.”

I instantly get mad. I don’t want to fucking hear that he’s been meeting up with her. He’s still married to me. Why the fuck is he seeing her? I don’t care if we’re not together, he’s still mine.

“Why are you telling me this?” I snap.

“She made me see a lot of things.”

“Oh yeah, like what?” I ask sarcastically.

“That what happened to Harper wasn’t my fault. I knew you didn’t trap me with a baby, but I needed an excuse, a way out, because I was afraid I was going to fail you and the baby, just as I failed Harper.” He runs his fingers through his hair. “But I now realize I need to let go of the pain and anger that have been hovering over me for years.”

I hear the honesty in his voice, and I believe he didn’t mean to hurt me. He was projecting.

I get it, but I need more time to think and clear my head. I really want to know if this marriage is for me.

When we first started this relationship, it started out as a marriage of convenience. It started as a business transaction, and we didn’t get to know each other. And somewhere along the way, we both fell in love. We went ass-backward with this marriage.

I never thought I would fall in love with Jasper and end up pregnant. But I need time to think about what I want. What I need for this baby. I don’t want him to hurt me again, and I’m afraid.

“I already know you were projecting on me. I figured it out already. What do you want, Jasper? What are you saying?”

He steps closer and sits beside me, pulling me in his lap. I allow him to touch me, because I miss him so much. I miss the smell of him, the essence of him. He smiles, and sitting on top of him is making me super horny. I get up from his lap, in an attempt to not give in to the temptation. I read online that pregnant sex is better than regular sex and I’m tempted to try it out. I just had to marry someone who is gorgeous as fuck. Someone who knows how to use his tongue and dick. I had to fall in love with him, too.

He gets up from the couch and strokes my cheek, and I bite my lip, allowing his touch.

“I want my family back. I want us back. And I want you back. I’ve been a foolish man, but letting you go has been my biggest regret.”

“You know, Jasper, our relationship started out as a business transaction. We were never traditional.”

“I know that. Why are you reminding me?” he says.

“I don’t know. I guess I’m saying we need to take things slow. I love you, I really do. But I want us to start dating. We skipped that phase. We went from marriage to becoming fuck buddies behind closed doors. Our marriage was fake to the world, built on lies, and I want us to start over.”

---