Page 38 of Room 1003

Ben was immediately spurred into action. He was the man with a plan for every scenario. In his job, he was used to electrical fires and dubious structural integrity. This wasn’t anything he couldn’t handle. Except while he directed Kit to find his grandfather and ushered me to the bedroom to get changed into some dry clothes, I could see his skin flushing, sweat dotting his forehead.

“Hey, are you okay?” I asked him when he crouched down in front of me, peeling my pants off for me with shaking hands.

“Sure,” he choked out. “Why wouldn’t I be okay? I should be asking you that.” I realized in this moment one very big difference between us. Having a baby was something I had some experience with, but this was all new for Ben. He was scared, just like I was when I went into labor with Kit.

“Hey,” I said softly, placing a hand under his chin to bring his gaze up to mine. “Everything will be fine. Our bag is packed. Dad will take care of Kit while you drive me to the hospital. There’s lots of time.”

He nodded, his brown eyes glossy with a sheen of tears. “Okay.” He drew in a long, slow breath, then he sat up on his knees to kiss me with tenderness. “I just wish I could do this for you.” There was a slight tremor to his lips on mine, but I didn’t mind taking the lead on this. All year, he’d been the one with experience, and now it was my turn.

“Some things I have to manage on my own, but I’ll tell you what. I could really use a hand to hold, someone to rub my back, feed me ice chips. Do you think you can do that for me?”

He seemed relieved to have a job to do, a set of tasks to focus on. “I’ll be the best damn hand-holder, back-rubber, ice-chip-feeder you’ve ever seen.”

“I know you will.” I kissed him once more before standing up and letting him pull up my dry pants. Then we grabbed our birthing bag and headed to the car.

Kit’s excited chanting of, “The baby’s coming! The baby’s coming!” was still echoing in my ears when we arrived at the hospital. He had stood on the porch and waved at us until our car was out of sight. He still hadn’t told us what names he’d chosen for the baby, so while we paced the hallway, waiting for our room to be ready, I distracted Ben from his stress by coming up with the most outlandish name possibilities. “Maybe it will be… Mandrake McGillicuddy.”

He laughed, his shoulders shaking. “Or Blueberry Bubble-bottom.”

“Plucky Ducky,” I said.

And he volleyed back with, “Whammy Woo-woo.”

I made a face. “Maybe we should be grateful if it’s only Blaze.”

“Mr. Howe and Mr… Salmonella? No, sorry, that’s not right. Mr. Staunch…”

“Just Ben is fine,” I answered for him, laughing, until a contraction turned the laugh into a wheeze. Poor kid might end up with an unfortunate name, between Kit’s choice for first name and Ben’s last name. First, though, I had to focus on bringing them into this world.

Labor was not fun—like, at all. Even though it had been seven years since I’d gone through this the first time, as soon as the pain bore down on me, it brought back the memories in stark detail. “Oh yeah,” I moaned. “I remember this.”

Kit’s birth had been long and drawn out, with hours and hours of pushing, but if I was being honest, I hadn’t really been trying very hard. It hurt, dammit, and it was only natural to be scared of the pain. As I got more and more exhausted, they had threatened to do a C-section because they were worried about how long it was taking, but in the end, I finally managed to get it done.

This time, I was determined the birth would be a whole lot faster. Instead of shying away from the pain, I would lean into it. I was going to get this over with as quickly as possible so I could get home to my family. I didn’t want to waste any more time than necessary. If losing Embry had taught me anything, it was to live every moment to the fullest, because we had no idea how much time any of us had on this earth. We had a life to live, and I was eager to get back to it.

After a long night of slowly progressing contractions, it was finally time to push. With the doctor between my bent knees, I took Ben’s hand and sat up, and I let out an almighty bellow. The burning truly set in like a red-hot searing pain, and I was distantly aware of Ben cheering me on, but it was the command inside my own head that I heard:I can do this. No hours of pushing, no fear. Get to work and bring that baby into this world.

And that was what I did.

With a rush and a gasp and a reedy cry, our daughter was born, and I collapsed back onto the bed in relief. “I did it,” I whispered so softly, almost surprised, but Ben heard me.

“You sure did,” he said, kissing my sweaty forehead. His eyes were filled with tears of joy, and they trickled over his beard, making his kisses salty. “Thank you for choosing me. You have made me the luckiest man alive.”

The entire experience was night and day when compared to my first child. The nurses didn’t coddle or pester us like they had when I was a first-time parent. I guess because I had some experience, they assumed I had it all figured out. I was just grateful for the chance to rest.

I managed to get our daughter latched on to feed, then closed my eyes for a few minutes.

There was a soft knock at the door, and I dragged open my heavy eyelids to see who was here. I must’ve fallen asleep. My dad was peeking around the doorframe. “Are you decent?” he whispered. “We can come back later if you’re sleeping.”

“No, come in, please. I want to introduce you to your granddaughter. Where’s Kit?”

Dad ducked out and came back a moment later with Kit, who’d been waiting out in the hall. His eyes were wide and his lips pinched tight. Dad probably told him he had to be quiet around the baby, but I could see his excitement in the way he was tugging on the hem of his shirt. He was fighting not to squeal, I just knew it.

“Come here, bud. Come meet your sister, and then maybe you can tell us what her name is.”

Kit’s grin was all teeth, and he gave a hop, skip, and a jump over to the bed, and Ben lifted him up so he could sit on the edge of the bed and peer into the wrapped bundle in my arms. Kit oh, so carefully reached out one finger before asking, “Can I touch her?”

“Of course you can. Just be gentle.”

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