Page 31 of I Promise You
He sits silently, staring where I used to sit on the steps as I walk away. He’s not moving, but his body language tells me he’s hurt.
But I’m angry with him for pushing the limits with me. He’s never done this before; it’s taking me by surprise. He’s always been a shoulder my mother and I could lean on after my brother’s passing. But this? This was something new…and I’m conflicted. Because I love him for that. But…I’m with Danny.
“Good night, Mr. Slaughter.” The guilt begins to eat me alive with each step I take.
What is wrong with me?
I walk toward my front door quickly. I feel terrible. This isn’t like me. It was a weak moment rooted in vulnerability and trauma. Yes…that’s what it was. Ithas to be.
I grab the door handle, about to swing it open. It opens slightly, but my movements fall short when Kane stops me from running away.
He grabs my hand in his big, rough hands and grips me hard, then slams the door shut, and fire pricks into every single vein, boiling when I hear it close.
“You’re right, Ari Alvarez, I shouldn’t be here.” His voice is deep and full of ecstasy, almost seducing. “But I don’t care anymore,” Kane adds, his tone full of momentousness.
I feel like whatever he’s about to say will end his friendship with Danny forever. His dark blue eyes are searching for something more from me urgently. I turn away from his eyes and look at his hand wrapped around mine.
His big hand swallows mine whole, and I try to retrieve myself from his grasp, but he holds on tighter.
“I need to say something, and I’m going to say it once and never again.”
I lift my chin to face him at his persistence. I’m enveloped with pure curiosity. It isn’t like him to be so authoritative around me.
“I’m in love with you. I’ve always been in love with you since the first time I saw you. I’ve been keeping my distance, but I can’t anymore. And I need you to know this.”
There it is, his blatant, simple yet catastrophic confession I knew was coming one day. I assumed that he wouldn’t ever come truly clean about his feelings after he saw me with Danny at the beach.
A tear falls out of my eye as he confesses his feelings. I feel completely torn in two. I don’t want to lose Kane—he’s too important.
“I’m all in, Ari. I’d leave the fucking military for you. Danny might not want children, but I want it. I want it all. I want babies, a marriage, I want…you.”
Why is he doing this? Why now?
“Kane, I—” What the hell does he want me to say to that? This is not okay, but somewhere deep down in my heart, I know he might be the better man for me. He’s soft and sunny. While Danny is dark and full of demons he didn’t ask for. He was thrown into it by his parents. Thrown into the fire and forced to learn how to adapt to being burned daily.
Still, I can’t surpass the fact Danny has changed me in good ways, too.
Even if his love for me has been challenging, he’s taught me many things about myself and has helped me grow into the woman I am today.
“I just don’t know what you want me to say, Kane,” I whisper.
“Don’t say anything. I just need you to know.” He closes the distance between us even more now. He lifts his arm and palmsthe side of my front door. His lips are on my ear, causing my skin to quiver and my lungs to stop at a standstill.
“I’m all in.I know you’re with him now. Don’t get me wrong, Grim is my best friend. He’s my brother. He started to change slowly this past year, and it all makes sense now that I know it’s because of you.”
A cold breeze whips our way, sending the tips of our noses freezing and my bangs brush over my eyes.
Kane moves them away, forcing me to look at him.
“You’re good for him, but maybe you need someone who’s good for you.”He gives me that same dashing, warm, dorky smile and drops his hand to his waist. He finally leans away from me as he whispers, “I’m willing to be whatever you need me to be when I’m with you in any way that I can. No matter what, I made a promise, and I’ve kept it since day one. I’m all in, Ari Alvarez.”
Another tear falls down my cheeks.
I’m fucking confused and overwhelmed.
“Damn it, Kane, shut up,” I murmur, fighting so damn hard not to slap him.
Kane scoffs, followed by a smirk.
