Page 46 of I Promise You
Her deep-toned skin and amber eyes are enchanting. Still, I feel like no one compares to the sweetheart that’s Ari Alvarez, and I resent it. I resent the sweetheart who’s forbidden.
“I’m sorry, Meredith, but I’ve gotta go. I have to work early in the morning, in about four hours, actually.” I reject her as I pull my jeans back on, sliding in one foot at a time.
It’s not a lie. I did have to go back home. Work never stops.
She frowns and sits, covering herself with her blankets as I button my jeans.
“Oh…okay, I get it,” Meredith says, disappointed.
I’ve hurt her feelings. I get it, I know, but this will take me some time. I want to take this slow. Maybe I can move on with Meredith.
Could carrying on with her help me through this?
“This was fun. I’ll call you tomorrow.” I lean in closer to her, shirtless. My hands are on each side of Meredith’s waist, the bed sinking as the muscles in my triceps constrict as I close in the distance.
Her eyes light up with hope as I peck on her cheek. There’s no emotion to it. There’s no emotion because they’re all somewhere else…all for Ari.
Fuck, I’m an asshole.
I want her so badly, but Meredith and I hit it off well at her birthday party. She’s outspoken and wild—the total opposite of Ari. I didn’t know this was the way my night was going to turn out. I hadn’t planned it to, but I’m glad it did. It’s been a minute since I had a girlfriend. I don’t want a girlfriend just yet. I’m waiting until I’m certain of the next girl…because I want to make sure my next one will be future wife.
Meredith smiles. Her smooth skin glows as she blushes. I back away from her, grab my shoes and finish dressing.
I need to move on…so I slept with Meredith. I need to try at least, right?
“You better.” Meredith bites her bottom lip before lying on her pillow.
I wink at her as I throw on my shirt. She lives far from my house, so I have a long way home.
I almost didn’t give in, but I’m having the worst case of blue balls since I’ve been home from Iraq.
Nothing will relieve it, truly, unless it’s from my favorite nurse.
I walk out of Meredith’s house, quickly greeted by the December winds.
Fuck, it’s cold.
I start jogging as another harsh wind makes my hair fall into my eyes. As soon as I get home, I’m turning on the heater and knocking out.
I’m halfway to my motorcycle when my phone rings.
Fuck. I don’t have to look at it to know it’s work. I’m not surprised that I’m getting alerts this late at night; it always comes at the oddest hours. Another mission…another deployment.
My contract will be up soon, and I’m counting down the days now because I don’t want to end up like Paul. I stop on the frozen grass, my boots crunch, and I take my phone out.
16
ARI
Saying goodbye to my friends was harder than I thought. I was so happy to see them celebrate another year of life with me. I almost didn’t make it to this day.
Soon, I’ll be making a trip to my brother’s tombstone to talk to him, to catch him up on how much of a rollercoaster my life has been since he’s passed. Also, to reassure him of how much I love his Bronco and that I take it to get deep cleaned monthly. I wonder if he’ll teach his nephew how to play guitar in heaven and if it’ll be a Sublime tune or Mana.
God, how this fucking hurts.
“Good night, Mom. Thank you for coming.” She squeezes me tight, and I hold my breath for a second.
“Happy birthday again,mija. I’m happy to see you’re doing better.”
