Page 21 of The Burnt Heart

“If you say so.” Jesse rolled his eyes.

“We need to give her time to miss us, to see that life isn’t better without us—” I cut off with a curse as Jesse folded his arms over his chest. He didn’t agree, and nothing I said would change his mind. “I want to go to her too. Do you think I enjoy seeing her with that idiot?”

“We’re bigger idiots than he is.” Briar shrugged, self-deprecating.

“Jesse?” I needed assurance he would stick to the timeline she’d requested. He sneered, striding past me and opening the door.

“Two months. I agreed, even though I think it’s horseshit. So, you can run off with a clear conscience now. I’ll monitor our girl.”

The oppressive judgement followed me down to the sidewalk. A sleek, black sedan pulled up, and I jumped in, not able to relax into the leather seats. Was I making a mistake? I’d been on autopilot since our conversation at Adelaide’s office when she’d cut us into tiny pieces. I’d ushered the other two out, something Jesse had raged about later. He wanted to fight, to push back and Briar wanted to give up, to sink into the ground and wallow. I stood in the middle, trying to be the voice of reason. We had hurt Adelaide too deeply to expect her to forgive us. What we’d done had caused more damage than we ever expected. We’d been so sure of our love, so confident that the words wouldn’t penetrate, and our apologies would be balm enough. Our focus had been on the tantalizing taste of a future they had denied us for six years.

We were fools.

Worse than fools. We were arrogant.

It was our penance to shoulder the agony we were in right now. Destroying the heart of the person I cherished had gone beyond the fake break-up. We’d forgotten our anniversary and neglected her. It was unforgivable. So, we had to give Adelaide time and space. We owed her that. She’d insisted we were done, but I wasn’t about to let her slip away from me a second time. Two months we’d wait, give her space and let us re-group. Then we’d come at her with a vengeance. I knew what she was thinking, ever the strategist. She thought two months would be enough time for us to get used to life without her. To move on. There was only one person I would get on my knees for, and she would find out I was a bratty sub. I wasn’t going to do as I was told.

I couldn’t stay in Greenich Bay when every part was saturated with memories of Adelaide. I’d be at her door tomorrow, forcing myself into her life. There was a second reason. I wanted to go to her and say with one hundred percent certainty that there was no secret longing to leave, to live anywhere except by her side.

I’d spent the plane ride mired in thoughts, nausea owning my stomach. The minute the wheels had peeled off the tarmac, intense doubt flooded my body. It was too late now. Greenich Bay disappeared behind marshmallow clouds, but my tight chest remained. Briar got his wish. They crammed me into the middle seat. Someone sitting next to me had tried to strike up a conversation. My blank face and mute words soon had them turning to their phone instead. I didn’t bother looking at mine. There was only one person I wanted to hear from, and she had blocked me.

Later that day, I followed Louis, a club manager, as we trailed deeper into the nightclub. My photography mentor, Chris, had set up the meet. I’d met him while working at the gym and he’d taken me under his wing. I fingered my camera bag around my shoulder.

“Is it built into the actual cave walls?” I looked around, wide-eyed.

“That’s right, it plays off the natural acoustics. Wait until later when it really gets ramped up. Fucking transcendent man. Maybe we can unwind after having a few drinks? Lots of pretty girls here tonight.” Louis smirked back, ushering me up onto the raised stage where the DJ was twirling a myriad of buttons. I struggled to smother my grimace, darting out the way of his swaying body.

“No thanks, I’m here to work and I’ve got a girlfriend.”

“That figures,” Louis laughed, flashing his pass at the security guard who let us by. We climbed a tight staircase until we came to a second level. The earthy roof of the cave was incredible from this viewpoint. The laser lights reflected off it beautifully. I pulled out my camera and changed the settings so I could capture the moody, otherworldly atmosphere. Louis clapped his hand on the metal railing.

“This is the best angle to give the client that wow factor they want. But once you’re done here, take some photos from the stage, behind the bar even. We want this to look dynamic, capture some of the magic of this place. Any questions?”

“I’ve got it from here.” I fiddled with my settings. Louis clapped a hand on my shoulder. I swallowed a noise of disgust. The hard touch sending uncomfortable ripples through my body.

“Let me know if you change your mind about that drink, big guy.”

I shook my head at Louis as he left.

Not a chance. I was here to work. To keep myself from pounding on Adelaide’s door day and night. Chris had been sick of me moping on the doorstep of his studio and offered to set me up with some photography work. With our gym idea shelved for the moment, I was going to focus on what I wanted. Something that terrified me, but I owed it to myself and to Adelaide. The pay was negligible, but it was a step in the right direction. I had always wanted to be a photographer, and it was time to stop the lies.

I looked through the lens of my camera, imagining Adelaide swaying and shaking to the throbbing music that filled the nightclub. Sweat beading on her body as we danced against each other. She’d grind her plump ass against my dick until I threatened to pick her up and carry her off. Without thinking, I had already grabbed my phone.

Siren, I’m in a nightclub that’s in a cave. The music echoes all round, you would love it. But I’m not dancing. I’m not partying. I’m here as a photographer, taking photos for them to use for marketing. But I can’t stop imagining you here with me. No matter where I go, I’m always missing you.

Send.

My chest ached as I brought the camera to my face again. Losing myself in each frame, frowning as I tried to capture the beauty of this place. My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I snatched it out with trembling fingers.

It was an unknown number. Adelaide?

“Hello?” I covered my open ear and strained to listen.

“Hey Logan.” My shoulders slumped as I recognized Chris’s voice. “Sounds like you made it there, ok?”

“Yeah, I just got started,” I shouted, the music making it difficult to hear.

“I won’t keep you, but I just had another opportunity pop up. How do you feel about the snow? A friend of mine who works at a ski resort is looking for someone to capture their refurb. Thing is, they would need you ASAP.”

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