Page 40 of Overdue

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Reed rocks onto his knees and takes my face into his hands. He frantically searches my body for injuries. I dare a peek around him to see several of the trees that lined the street torn from their roots. “Austen?”

“I’m fine.” I sound scared. “You?”

“I’m good.” Slowly, he rises to his feet. He pulls me up, his eyes never leaving mine. “Fuck, you scared me. When I got Gran to your parent’s house and you weren’t there…” He shakes his head.

“My parents.” I feel the panic rising again. Are they okay? We have a storm shelter in the basement. Did they make it in time?

“They were heading into the storm shelter with Gran when I left. Eliot is there also. They’re fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m positive.” We stand in silence, staring at each other. I want so desperately to crawl into his arms and have him hold me. He makes me feel safe.

“The books,” I groan.

I walk to what’s left of the front of the library. Glass and paper litter the floor. There’s even a tree laying partially inside. It’s raining through the broken windows and there’s a hole in the roof. On inspection, though, the books in that section don’t seem to be a complete loss yet.

I spin around to beg Reed to help me move them somewhere drier. He’s on his phone.

“Damn it, no signal. I’m sure it’ll be a while before it’s restored. We need plywood to shore up those windows and a tarp for the roof. I need to get to the lumber store. Are you good for a few minutes until I get back?”

I nod numbly, then get to work moving books to the back. I’ve got the majority moved when Reed returns with help. Raffe, Joe, and a couple of Reed’s friends begin hammering plywood over the windows. More help arrives to lay tarps across the worst parts of the roof. Reed brings in a shop vac to suck up water. It’s several hours of hard work before we’ve done all that can be done tonight.

“Thank you, everyone.” The men slowly leave for their own homes. Soon it’s just Reed and me again. He’s sitting on the circulation counter. The computer has been destroyed, as has everything else on the desk. “I hope this is the worst of the damage in town. Have you heard if anyone else was hit?” I ask. He lifts his exhausted eyes to mine.

“God, Austen.” His eyes flit to the boarded windows. “I didn’t know if I could get to you in time. When they said the tornado was heading for town, I just ran. I had to make sure you were safe.”

I appraise the library, thinking about his words. He risked his own life to save mine. And he always will. I know that as well as I know my own name. Reed will always be there. This is it. This is where we both start acting like adults. Or maybe he already is, and it’s time for me to catch up.

“Can I ask you something?”

His tired eyes turn back to me. “Sure,” he says.

“If you’ve always hated me so much, why do you always come to my rescue?”

“I’ve never hated you.” His eyes turned stormy with irritation.

“Maybe hate is too strong of a word, perhaps dislike would be better.”

“Christ, Austen. Is that what you think?”

I nod.

He looks away again as if gathering his thoughts. “Do you know what I thought the first time I met you?”

I shake my head this time. I’ve always wondered.

“I thought, ‘Here’s the person I want to meet.’ Not your sister. You were sitting in that swing, reading something entirely too old for you. One short-clad leg pushing you back and forth. These strong feelings started swirling inside me. There was no one to explain what was happening. The man I needed to ask was dead. I had no idea what to do. I just knew I wanted your attention.”

“But you always acted like you couldn’t stand to be near me,” I say.

“I think I was so confused at first, I panicked every time I saw you. Hell, I’m still making a mess out of everything. Do you remember that graduation party when I found you on the swing?” I nod. “I started to kiss you, and you took a dive rather than let that happen. I should have taken the hint then.”

“No. I didn’t take a dive because I didn’t want to kiss you. I forgot where I was at the moment and fell off. I desperately wanted you to kiss me.” He smiles for the first time and my heart skips a beat. “So, you never disliked me?”

“No, Austen” He runs a hand through his hair. “I was in love with you from the moment you broke my nose. Still am, even after all this time. Even after all the bullshit we put each other through.” He slides off the counter and cups my cheek in his hand. “All I’ve ever wanted was for you to see me, to give us a chance.”

I don’t need to hear anymore. I grab a fistful of his shirt and pull him into a kiss. It doesn’t feel like enough. I need him to know what he means to me. He needs to see that, though I’ll always be a flake, I need him as much as the air I breathe.

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