Page 56 of Fight for Me

How do I always manage to destroy everything positive in my life?

CHAPTER XIII

THE WHOLE NEXT WEEK I have been miserable, walking around with a black cloud hanging over my head. My mood constantly swings from angry to sad and confused. And I hate this.

I hate the injustice of being treated like that by Brody, but what I hate even more is the fact that I miss him, and secretly hope for him to call, text, or to stop by.

Of course, my heart twists with disappointment each time I check the phone, and the only thing awaiting me there are unanswered calls from a private number, which I know to be Ricky’s attempts to reach me.

Rita has been on my ass constantly about going to his parole hearing next month to present myself as the doting girlfriend and a mother of Ricky’s child, begging for her man to be released, so we could finally be one happy family.

I usually just laugh it off and move on, entirely ignoring her threats about kicking me out. I’ve been hearing it for months, and I know these are just empty promises. She’s not going to get rid of her personal piggy bank, or cast away Henry, who seems to be the only joy in her life right now. But I will admit that her pushing on the subject starts getting on my nerves, which doesn’t improve my already shitty mood.

Today, though, is the first time that I felt slightly better and excited about my day from the moment I woke up in the morning. I tell myself that it has nothing to do with the fact today is Sunday and I will get to see Brody, and everything to do with the time I had to spend with my son. I mean, I do enjoy playing with Henry, but I will admit that he is not the reason I spent an extra-long time in front of the mirror choosing my outfit and doing my makeup for the first time in forever.

My palms shake as I park outside of Ruth’s and I feel the first wave of uncertainty when I don’t spot Brody’s car anywhere. Maybe he parked in the back alley. It wouldn’t be the first time. I mean, he has to be here, Aunt Ruth wouldn’t let him miss the Sunday dinner.

I repeat that to myself when I get out of the car, and he doesn’t show up to help me unclasp Henry from his seat, like he always does. What did I expect? The man literally kicked me out of his house only a few days ago.

That’s fine. Maybe it'll allow me more time to compose myself for when I see him. Honestly, I don’t know what my goal here is, but I feel the need to be in his presence. What for exactly? No idea. To make him face what he’s lost? To exact an apology from him for wanting to be in a relationship with me? Yeah... that won’t happen.

I’m so lost in the chaos inside my head that it gets me a moment to acknowledge that Amelia is standing right in front of me. I didn’t even realize that she and Mark parked next to my car, and that they were both looking at me with concerned expressions.

“Hey, girlie.” Amelia grabs my hand to draw my attention, then addresses her fiancé. “Mark, be a sweetie and help Jenny with Henry. Don’t forget his bag.”

“No, I can...” I say and frown over my shoulder when the heavily pregnant woman starts dragging me toward the entrance.

“He’ll be fine. I heard Brody’s not coming, so he’s not here to help you. Have you lost some weight or is my perspective broken because all I see when I’m looking in the mirror is a whale-sized human being,” she teases, but I see the concern in her eyes.

“I might have skipped some meals this week... Hey, why won't Brody show up?” I ask, aiming at casual. “I thought Ruth told him once, that if he misses the Sunday dinner, he’d better be on his deathbed, or she’ll put him into one.”

Amelia chuckles and leads us toward the kitchen. “Yeah, I guess something really important came up at the construction site, so she made an exception. Aren’t you guys... talking?”

I scratch behind my ear and look away. “I guess we’ve all been busy lately.”

My pregnant friend hums in her throat and gives me a calculating look but drops the subject when we enter the room to be greeted by a cheery-looking Ruth.

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