Page 3 of Wasted Oil

Why he was friends with me was beyond my knowledge.

"Boots! We did it!” He sets me down, keeping his hands firm on my rib cage.

"Yeah we did!”

"Next stop College for us and World Music Tour for you.”

He looks down straight into my eyes and I roll mine because that's a dream that will be just that. A dream.

He goes to say something but stops just as I hear my mothers voice.

"Mija! I’m so proud of you and you three as well.” Rhett lets me go from our embrace. I automatically miss the warmth and his smell of sandalwood leather.

"Thank you mamá.” She pulled all four of us into a hug with little sniffles escaping out of her.

"Congrats guys, West Hill High is gonna be boring without the OG four there to run it.” My brother says.

"Awe come on X. RJ, Roxy and you can be the three musketeer's when you three start your freshman year in the fall." Johnny teases trying to bring him into a noogie.

Rhett and Johnny say their goodbyes and walk towards Rhett's mom and dad. Grace waves over to me giving me a thumbs up. That woman has always loved me and always used to ask why Rhett and I aren’t together, it was the same answer as always when she asked.

“We’re just best friends Mrs. Parker, nothing more to it.” Her response back was always the same, “oh hush it with all the ‘Just Best Friends’ stuff.” Finger quotes and everything too.

“I can clearly see that you like him and I can clearly see that he likes you as well. A mother always knows. You have a beautiful heart, and it’s meant to know a beautiful love. Just watch sweetie, you’ll see.” My response was always a shoulder shrug with a side smile.

That question stopped when he and Janelle started dating sophomore year up till junior year. Then she met some college guy amongst other activities over summer while her and Rhett were still together, which led him to become kind of a man whore all of senior year. I so desperately wanted to be one of those girls, but like I said we were just best friends. I remained in the friend zone like a game of unblock me.

I wave back at Grace giving her a genuine smile mouthing a thank you as the guys pull her attention towards them.

Looking back I see Alex and my mom are having a conversation. Not wanting to bother them, I look over to my father, the look of boredom written all over his face. My father would love to be anywhere else but here, especially since today didn't involve all the attention on him in any way.

I know I have to go up and thank him, but the reality was if I could get away and not get in trouble, I would. But alas, I let out a shaky breath and walk up to him, hoping that even though its my graduation he will at least say something to me that didn't end up with him calling me a name or telling me I should have done better.

For once I just hoped he would say something nice and actually mean it. Maybe I just prefer him to say nothing at all.

“Hi daddy.” He looks down his nose at me and smiles, a fake smile to me but to anyone around it looked genuine.

"I’m proud of you babygirl.” I cringe at the name that he calls me, that name has no love behind it, his words are as meaningless and as cold as he is.

I want to laugh at his words he says to me, but I gulp it back .

"Thank you.” I begin to speak again when the principal and a very close friend of my father walks over to us and immediately his attention is on someone else rather than his own daughter who just graduated. Nothing that this man does surprises me anymore.I turn away feeling defeated, look up to the sky trying my hardest not to cry from the loneliness I feel.

I was snapped from my thoughts by the feel of a small dainty hand on my shoulder breaking my moment. Turning my head I see my mother smiling at me. Her smiles are always genuine and warm even though there is so much pain and torture behind them. She speaks up as if she knows what's running through my head.

"Don’t worry about it my love, he really is proud of you. You know your father, he just doesn't know how to express his feelings.”

I scoff and shrug her hand off my shoulder. She has got to be kidding me right? I don’t mean to come off rude, but when she says things like this, I can’t help but be rude.She is always trying to find excuses for that man, talking about how he used to be so loving and he was so much calmer back then, blah blah blah. The overused excuse chimes in, "well you know how he gets.”

It was all bullshit, he was never loving for as long as I can remember, he is the epitome of evil and though people can’t see it, they don’t know the evil I know in the shadows.

"Yeah sure he does má, his feelings are expressed all over my back and scared inside my mind. But I’ll let you think that he isn't the monster that you married.”

I walk away and join Alex, her little brother RJ, my brother Xavier and Rhett’s youngest sister Roxy. The boys are going on about summer baseball camp and Roxy is gushing to Alex over a book she just finished. I just stand pretending to listen while my eyes search the crowed again for Rhett. I haven't been able to keep my eyes off him all night. More than a couple times I envisioned me just grabbing the back of his head, smashing my lips to his and finally saying, "I love you. I've always loved you." That vision is always short lived when my anxiety snaps me back to reality.

After the graduation ceremony, my family met up with the Daniels gang at Texas Roadhouse for dinner that Alex and I begged to go to for the delicious bread basket. Thankfully it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was gonna be. Of course Father was on his phone half the time or talking to Mr. Daniels about RJ and Xavier’s summer baseball training camp, while my mom and Mrs. Daniels are going on about the summer plans of them going back to their lake house up in Illinois. They moved there when Alex was just starting junior high but kept their home here for when they come back to town to visit family as well to have a place if they aren’t feeling the cold winters. Alex didn’t move with of course, she stayed back with her mom, Lynn. Her dad and mom got divorced when she was still an infant and then he remarried his high school sweetheart Mrs. Daniels, Elizabeth.

Over hearing them talking I look at Alex and nudge her with my elbow.

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