Page 64 of Winter Break Up

“That’s why we have cell phones. And plane tickets, whenever we can get away for even twenty-four hours.” I’ll do everything possible to see her as much as I can.

“Promise to buy the plane WiFi and text me the whole flight?” She’s adorable when she’s needy.

It’s the first time we’ll truly be apart as a couple, and the sadness clamping down on my heart makes it hard to breathe. I know we’ll try to see each other every few weeks, we’ll talk all the time, and that it’s only a few months, but I love her so fucking much it’s almost impossible to leave. I’m ready to be with her every day, just like we talked about when we were teens.

It’s coming, so soon I can taste it. I’m going to make a home for us, provide a life where she can do whatever she wants. If she wants seven master’s degrees and a PhD, I’m going to help make it possible in whatever way I can.

“Of course I will.” I pull her in by the sweatshirt strings, admiring my huge-ass Miami soccer clothing on her body. “You should have let me fuck you in this before I left. That memory is one I’d recall often.”

“Sign with a team and I’ll do you one better.” She leans up to whisper in my ear, “Jersey sex.”

My dick twitches with anticipation. “Ah, every athlete’s number one fantasy.”

We both pull back to look into each other’s eyes, our expressions growing serious.

“I love you, Mercer.” Her earnest expression is all I’ve ever wanted.

“You’re the love of my life, Em. It’s always been you. Will always be you. Fuck the distance, we’re forever. It’ll pass in a blink, then you’ll have me so much, you’ll get sick of me.”

“Not likely.” She snuggles into me and I cocoon my body around hers.

In this chaotic airport, we’re still in our little bubble. To me, this girl has always felt like home. One look at her and I’m put at ease. Even when we’re apart, I can just think of how she’s mine again and a calm will settle over my body. It already has.

An announcement over the PA system has us moving a fraction, the spell broken.

“I should get through security and to my gate. Can’t miss my flight.” I feel the grimace as it passes over my face, because I kind of wish I could miss my flight.

It would give me a few more hours with her.

“Go.” She swats at me, reading my mind. “I’ll be okay. I mean, I won’t be. But at least you’re my boyfriend again and I can giddily daydream about that in my sadness.”

“Stop on the way home and get yourself an extra sugary latte to make you feel better.” I kiss her cheek, unable to stop touching her.

Our fingers won’t unlace even as I pick up my bags again, rolling them toward the line snaking around the crowd control ropes. Emily holds on tighter, knowing we’re nearing our last opportunity at physically holding each other for a while.

“It’s only a few months,” I repeat, trying to convince myself more than her.

“Only a few months.” She nods.

“I love you. So fucking much.” We’re basically making out at the entrance of the security line, but I couldn’t care less.

My mouth devours hers, savoring her taste like I’m going to draw it out for the next several weeks on my own tongue.

“I love you.” Em breathes, sighing into me.

“Please keep moving,” someone instructs me, and I know it’s time.

Letting her hand go is one of the hardest things I think I’ve ever had to do in my life. This is how it’s always been between us though, intense and all-consuming. It’s why I want to be with her for the rest of my life. It’s why she was my first, and why she’ll be my last.

As I roll my bag through the line, I keep my eyes locked on her retreating form. Every few steps she looks back at me, smiling through tears, and mouths those three little words. I mouth them back and blow her a kiss, the corniness flowing through my veins.

I don’t give a fuck, though; I’m a man in love.

All too soon, Emily is standing by the exit doors, hand over her heart like she’s leaving it with me. Then she turns to go. Those gorgeous waves are the last I see of her, and I’m left feeling a little empty. Like a piece of me is missing.

Except this time, I know it’ll be waiting for me whenever we’re together again. This time, I don’t have to question our status or commitment.

Emily Palmer is my forever girl. And we only have a little while longer to wait until we can start it all together.

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