Page 91 of All I Want For Christmas Is You

The airline could wait. Opening a new tab, she logged into her store’s dashboard and found a good number of sales she’d ignored. Against the wall, she had a stack of boxes she hadn’t mailed yet. How could she carry them into the post office with a two-year-old? She’d told herself it was the holidays, so everyone would understand.

She glanced at the unfulfilled orders. One was a commissioned piece that would bring in real money.

I’m doing it again. I’m putting my needs, my work, on hold for someone else.

Only this time, it wasn’t her own children. It wasn’t her husband.

It was for someone else’s family.

It’s okay. Don’t get upset.

It’s only been a few days.

Beau hadn’t asked her to do anything. No, she’d stepped right in. She’d offered to watch Colt.

What should I have done, though? He couldn’t take a two-year-old to work with him. He was literally going into a mine shaft.

But that wasn’t the right question because her default setting was helping others reach their goals. The correct question was: what would a person who prioritized herself and her business have done?

She would’ve taken Colt that first morning and then looked for babysitters and daycare facilities to help her out. This family had lived here for decades, so they had to have plenty of recommendations. She’d have found a balance between her work and taking care of her lover’s grandson.

If my work isn’t my top priority, what will my future look like? If she couldn’t support herself, she’d be at the mercy of her children.

That will never happen. I’m not their problem.

She couldn’t believe how easily she’d fallen into her old pattern.

But it was all right because she’d noticed. She could do something about it.

Talk to him. She called Beau. When he didn’t answer, she calmly left a message. “Hey, I hate to bother you at work, but we need to talk. I’m going to need some help with babysitting so I can get my work done. Give me some guidance, okay?”

There. See? No big deal. Beau would hire someone, and everything would be fine.

Much calmer now, she went back to the airline’s page. When she saw the change fee, she was relieved. It wasn’t bad at all. But just as she went to purchase it, she heard a scream. Leaping from the chair, she tore down the hallway and threw open Colt’s bedroom door.

She found the little boy pressed against the wall, blankets askew. “I’m here, baby. I’m here.” Desperate to comfort him, she reached out, but he twisted away, shrieking. “Are you okay? Sweetie, tell me what’s wrong.” Was he hurt? It was impossible to tell. He wouldn’t let her touch him. “Baby, I can’t help if you don’t talk to me.”

“Ga-ga. Want Ga-ga.”

“I know you do, doll. Of course, you do. Grandpa’s at work right now, but I’m here, and I can help you. Will you let me?”

“No. Ga-ga. Want my ga-ga.”

“All right. I’m going to call him, okay?” Dammit, she’d left her phone in the office. “Here, come with me.” She held out her hand, but he refused to take it. The abject fear in his eyes made her frantic to comfort him. I can’t leave him alone like this. “If you want me to call Grandpa, you have to come with me.”

Tears streaked his flushed cheeks, and he kicked out his legs. He looked so miserable she could hardly stand it.

“What about Aunt Lorelei? Can I get her?”

“No.” In all the time she’d spent with him, he’d never had a tantrum. He’d never been distressed. “Ga-ga.” It was a mournful plea that ripped her heart into a thousand pieces.

She had no choice but to leave him. “Okay, I’ll be right back. I’m just getting my phone.” On her way down the hallway, she knocked on Lorelei’s door. “I need your help.” How had the woman not heard the plaintive cries? She didn’t have time to wait, so she let herself in, only to find the room empty. “Dammit.” She dashed into the office, grabbed her cell, and hurried back to Colt.

“Okay, sweetie. I’m calling him right now.” Her hand was shaking because she didn’t know if he was all right. She didn’t see blood, and he seemed more scared than in pain. When Beau didn’t answer, she grew enraged.

He knows I’m watching his grandson. He has to be available to me.

Okay, distraction. That always worked with her kids. “Come on. Let’s get some hot chocolate while we wait for Grandpa to call us back, okay?”

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