Page 107 of Sweetheart: Part One

And I’dnevertell her that, because then the magic would vanish and ruin the dice roll: the chance that I could step into any room in this house, and stumble unknowingly into something as free and beautiful as Vex.

I couldn’t deny that she was special, her freedom loosening joints of a space creaking with the weight of the life I’d built. Despite everything between us, I thought she truly might be healing my pack.

She had wriggled under Ebony’s skin, was facing up to Rook’s arrogance—spending her extra nights with him right now despite their rocky start—and she was changing Drake from the inside out. I could feel it through the bond.

Drake had been wounded since he’d joined the pack, and no matter how comfortable he’d become with us, he’d never dared step further—until Vex. She was everything Drake needed. He was even leaving the house with her, and for more than just woodland walks. He was brighter through the bond than I’d ever felt.

And… shewassoftening my edges: a heart that had been made of stone since the day I’d walked away from the only woman that might truly have cared for me.

Vex slipped into a chair at my side, eyes darting nervously to the bottle of whiskey, as if I might be angry about it. I wasn’t, in fact I felt a strange warmth at the idea she might be comfortable in our house, even if I wasn’t sure of the reason behind the drinking. Perhaps there was none, but downing hard alcohol alone tended to signal something. No matter how it killed me, I hadn’t positioned myself to ask. Nor to comfort her.

“Do you want me to get Drake?” I asked.

Her eyes widened, and then she shook her head. “He should sleep. Sometimes he uh…” She trailed off, wincing.

“What?”

“Nothing. It’s just… good if he’s sleeping.”

I held her gaze, and I could see the guilt in it. “Did something happen?”

“No… nothing. I just… he clocked that I sleep into the afternoon after… after your nights, and he started staying up late so he could sleep with me.”

“Oh.”

“But uh… it’s my problem, what I’m doing wrong with you. And… besides,” she added, her voice weaker as a thought or memory seemed to hit her. “It doesn’t uh… matter now, anyway.”

I frowned at that.Hadsomething happened between them? I’d had a flash of fear from Drake down the bond this morning—enough to wake me up. Fleeting, and then gone as he slammed it shut. But that wasn’t unusual for him. Drake liked leaving the bond open, I think as evidence of how far he’d come. Knowing he was at a place where he could share what he felt gave him a sense of grounding, of progress. But sometimes, he tumbled back into his pain, and when he did, he locked it down—often before we caught it.

Except when he woke with nightmares.

But aside that, he’d been happy all day—startlingly so—and I knew he’d been with Vex.

“You care about him?” I asked, curious as to her take.

“Yes.” Her eyes were more alert for a moment as her gaze snapped to me, drunkenness fading. I swear there was a moment of panic in her expression. “I mean… of course, I care about all of this—all of you,” she said, as if she’d sounded too desperate the first time. Her dark brows drew together and I thought her lip quivered, her gaze darting to the bottle of whiskey on the table. Then she was composing herself, looking back at me. “But he… matters a lot to me.”

I frowned, trying to detangle that. I believed her, and for me, that was really quite devastating. How could Inotfall for a woman who cared for the one thing in the world I cared for more than anything else? Vex’s beauty went so much deeper than the way she looked. It was impossible to ignore.

More even than the impossibility of my childhood love.

It hurt, what had happened. In the years since I’d realised it would never have worked—she would never have been happy with us. It was her, or them, and the pack—Ebony—that was my path. It was the choice I made, even when five exhausting years made conviction hard to hold onto.

But Vex…

She fit both. Me, and them.

She looked so broken right now, though. I reached out without thought, touch sliding along her jaw, thumb brushing her bottom lip. She leaned into my palm, eyes fluttering closed, face becoming peaceful.

One day you’re going to dance like that just for me.I didn’t say it out loud. I wanted to, so desperately, but I didn’t.

“I wish…” she breathed, but trailed off, frowning again. “I wish I knew how I fucked things up with you.”

My chest tightened with guilt.

“Then maybe… I could fix it. You said I was no good as a Sweetheart, that I’m only here because I’m… different…” She trailed off, suddenly unsure. “I know that already…” Her voice was so fragile. “But if you could just tell me… why. Then maybe I could still do better.”

“You don’t need to worry about my needs, Vex.”

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