Page 43 of Before I Tell You

“Did something happen between you and Brian?”

“What?” My heart is pounding like a drum.

“Brian. Brian Gordon. Did somethinghappenbetween the two of you?” he asks, emphasizing the wordhappenlike he already knows. But that’s impossible. He doesn’t know. And he can’t know, which is why a lie leaves my lips faster than I mean it to.

“No.” I shake my head adamantly.

“It just seems like you get a little …anxiouswhen he’s around, and if something did happen, you just need to tell me—”

“No, nothing happened. I don’t know why you would think that. So please stop. You don’t understand.” I can feel the tears begging to escape, so I look away, doing everything in my power to hold them in as my throat burns.

“But that’s just it, Natalie. You won’t let me understand.” And that’s when I make the horrible decision to look up into his eyes. They are pleading with me to tell him what happened, which reluctantly destroys me. “Please tell me, Natalie. I want to help you, but I can’t if you don’t tell me what’s going on. I know something happened last year. It was methatnight who—”

But I cut him off before he can finish because I am getting too close to breaking, divulging everything to him. “It’s like you said last night. You don’t deserve to be with someone like me. I deserve better than you. It’s that simple.”

The pain flashing across his face is an immediate stab to my already aching heart.

I open the passenger door and jump out of his car, reaching the front door of my house within seconds, slamming the door behind me, and leaning back against it for full support. Tears are streaming down my cheeks and onto Nathan’s jacket that I am still wearing.

What did I just do?

The hurt in his eyes, now embedded in my mind, makes my chest throb, and the tears only intensify. I run up the stairs and into my room where I sob uncontrollably into my pillow for the next few hours.

I don’t know how or what he knew, but he knew something. And it’s probably for the best that he never finds out the truth since it would never have worked out between us anyway.

Right?

Fourteen

NATHAN

THE UNSETTLING IMAGE OF Natalie running out of my car has been stuck in my head for the past week, and there was nothing I could do to make it go away.

To make the pain stop.

Her words stung like a hard slap across the face.

You don’t deserve to be with someone like me. I deserve better than you. It’s that simple.

They played over and over again in my head, torturing me day and night. I tried convincing myself that she didn’t mean it and had only said those words to push me away, just like she had pushed so many others away, but I was also starting to believe that maybe she did mean them.

And the worst part was, maybe … she was right.

“Why so down?” Greg asks as he takes a seat next to me on the dock at the yacht club.

I had picked up as many shifts this week as possible to try and keep my mind off Natalie, but no matter how many boats I docked or cleaned, it didn’t seem to be working.

“I’m fine,” I reply.

“Come on, Nate, you’ve been miserable all week.”

“Have I been? Sorry, I didn’t realize I was,” I lie as I stand up and pick up the bucket beside me, looking across at the next boat to be cleaned that just docked nearby. Greg seems like a nice guy, but I don’t feel like having some heart-to-heart with him at the moment. I just need to stay busy and keep my mind as far away from Natalie as I possibly can, which is turning into an impossible pursuit.

“Something is obviously on your mind. Is it a girl?” Greg asks, making me stop in place.

I shrug my shoulders. “Maybe. How’d you know?”

“Because you look exactly like I did when I thought me and my girl were over.”

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