Page 137 of Undressed In The Crease

The crisp air still smells of rain from earlier, and the temperature dropped at least ten degrees. I shiver from the cold breeze and in the next moment, Nick pulls his jacket off and drapes it over my shoulders.

Am I in a twilight zone?

There’s no comment about hard nipples. There aren't any “accidental” touches. He had the perfect opportunity to wrap me into his arms and tell me all the ways he can warm me up.

What changed?

Just last night he was cornering me, kissing me, telling me how hard he is.

Is he moving on? Are we really now just friends?

But wasn’t it my idea in the first place?

Even earlier I thought he was still flirting, and then Greg mentioned the couple’s dance class. That was the turning point. It got too much for him.

It became too real.

I saw the fear in his eyes. It’s the same look he gets any time there’s a mention of us being more. We can never bemore.

“What’s your full name?” Nick asks as we walk past the quad.

“Huh?” Too wrapped up in my own thoughts, I have to ask him to repeat his question.

“What is Lenny short for? Or is it a nickname for something? What is your given first name?” I don’t answer him. “Come on, you know mine. Not everyone knows Nick is short for Nikolay. In fact, I think you may be the only one besides my family that does.”

He nudges my shoulder making me smile.

“My grandma called me Lenny, so the nickname just stuck.”

“Hmm.” He thinks about it, waiting. “And what does it stand for?”

He encourages me to continue, but I’m not giving it up that easily. I was never a fan of my name.

“You’ve got to earn it first.” I tease.

“Oh, I see. So, the multiple orgasms I’ve already given you aren’t enough?” Nick immediately bites his lip and turns his head as if he said something wrong.

I don’t know what to say to that. Any response I have goes down a road we both seem to be avoiding tonight.

“I'm sorry. I know you just want to be friends. I shouldn’t have said that.” He apologizes quietly as we come close to my house.

“Just because I want to be friends, doesn’t really change anything between us. I don’t know why this has to be awkward.” I don’t want him to stop joking with me, because he may be crossing a line.

I don’t want to lose what we have. It’s fun, it’s comfortable. Yeah, we’ve had sex. That shouldn’t just go away, because we’re friends.

“Doesn’t it though?” He stops at the corner, clearly not wanting to walk me to my door. “Doesn’t it change everything? We can’t be just friends and flirt or talk about sex. Talking about sex with you, just makes me want to have sex with you.” He looks up and sticks his hands in his pocket rocking back on his heels in frustration. “We had a fun night and I don’t want to ruin it, but think about it, Lenny. How can I be your friend? Even the other night, there was something more between us. I can’t see that going away.” I start to object, but he stops me. “Honestly, I really don’t want it to.” Nick shakes his head and slumps down. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Goodnight, Lenny.”

He turns and walks away without a second glance.

He didn’t even let me speak.

I’m left here with my head whirling and my stomach in knots.

This is it. After tomorrow, Nick will be out of my life. I can feel it coming to an end. I want to be friends without all the tension and hooking up, and he says we can’t or that he doesn’t want to be.

That’s what he said right?

I’m so confused. I have no idea what he wants. If all he wants is to continue sleeping together without actually being together, I can’t do that.

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