Page 15 of Mafie Trials

We may have earned her trust, and she may have wanted to trust us, but someone was keeping her afraid, keeping her paranoid. Havoc told us she fought for us, but I didn’t want to listen. Didn’t want to hear her excuses because they only hurt me more. All I thought about was my own hurt.

I turn to Doc then, knowing exactly what I need to do. “I’ll tell her,” I say before walking out of the room. I have a huge fucking apology to make. I can only hope my little shadow can forgive me.

Chapter 5

Evie wakes up shaking and my first thought is that I wish Damien was here. Something about him not being with us makes it all feel so much worse. She’s trembling as I reach for the bags she uses to throw up in when this happens. We move together like we both know the drill but the third time she goes for the bag, she loses it.

“He hates me,” she gets out between ragged breaths. “I can’t live like this. I don’t want to need him, but I need him.”

She’s shaking much more violently now. It’s been getting worse over the past two days, and now that it’s escalated to this, I don’t know what to do. The nurses are useless and tell her she just has to ride it out. Doc has been concerned but needed to see her meds to figure stuff out. Damien should have gotten them to him this morning but it’s well past midnight now, and I assume he’s been hiding out.

I grab her face to try and help her center herself as I force her to look at me. “He doesn’t hate you. He’s hurt right now, and the hurt is overpowering that love. He still loves you, I promise you, Lucky Charm. Helovesyou.”

Her eyes crease as I try to make my voice sound convincing because I do believe he still loves her, but he always feels too much and too deeply. I don’t know if he will ever be able to forgive her.

As if our minds conjured him, Damien walks into the room followed by Doc, who has a syringe in his hand that he screws into part of Evie’s IV as he nods at Damien and leaves. There’s a long, tense silence as we look at him. I’ve never seen his tan skin so pale or his face so defeated. I get up the second I realize what’s happening.

He needs her.

He practically falls into the bed beside her and even though I see her wince in pain, she pulls him closer. They fold into each other, fitting like the perfect missing puzzle pieces. Her IV gets tangled and without a word, I move to fix it, giving them their moment.

Damien sits up and cups her face in his hands more gently than he ever has before.

“I’m sorry,” he chokes out. The gravity and weight in his words has my eyes welling with tears. You can hear it in every breath he takes that he will break if she doesn’t forgive him.

Without question or hesitation, she looks him in the eyes and says, “I’m sorry too.”

And just like that, it’s like the whole universe shifts into place again. Just like that all of the Kings have their girl.

He sits up, wiping his face before settling in next to her. All the while he keeps his eyes on hers as if he’s afraid she might disappear. “I need to tell you what we found.”

She just rolls her eyes, but it seems like the shaking has started to settle. When she woke up screaming the first time, she thought I was Damien holding her. I have to admit, it hurt a little bit when her eyes fell in realization that it was me. I know better than to take it personally. I’m sure part of her thought all this was a dream for a moment. But it still hurt.

Now, she’s settling into him and starting to look more relaxed than she has since she first woke up.

“Lay it on me, Sunshine. I think by now I’m over the surprises. There’s a lot I don’t know, so I’m just going to have to figure it out once we have all the pieces.”

He nods at her with admiration sparkling in his eyes. “I’m so proud of you, Little Shadow,” his voice breaks at the end, but he hides the tears welling in his eyes by kissing her on the forehead. He pulls back once the shine has faded. “You’re medications, they were the problem. They’ve been causing your night terrors, your anxiety, and they are likely to blame for your lack of sleep and sense of panic as well. Doc tested them all and while some have components of antipsychotics, they are laced with other things too.”

Evie doesn’t even look phased. “Once I found out this was my uncle, I figured there was more,” she says as she leans back into Damien's arm and closes her eyes. “I’m not really surprised since he’s the one who set me up with all of those doctors. So much never lined up. Part of me wanted to think it was just because they were working for him so they wanted to get it over with for me, just force me to get past the trauma and hurt. That maybe, if I ignored it enough, it would just all go away. But honestly, you saying this makes more sense than anything else has in the last few days.”

“Doc is making some medications for you that should help you detox off of all the drugs. That’s what he just put in your IV. You’re likely going through withdrawal already.”

“That explains even more,” Evie says sitting up. I know the second she opens her eyes, she’s going to puke. I reach out for the bag but Damien gets it first, holding it for her with one hand and rubbing her back with the other.

The second she’s finished, she looks relieved and her eyes start drooping. “You need to rest,” I tell her. She’s torn through her stitches a few times due to the heaving, but I don’t see any blood start to pool up. She nods at me and then adjusts herself into Damien's side. His arm goes around her and my heart hurts.

I’ve been so mad at him. So angry with the words he used and the way he treated the whole situation. I could blame him for a lot of what happened. He was the one who wanted to punish her after we found out everything. But, if I’m honest, I don’t think it would have changed much.

It doesn’t mean I don’t understand his anger or his hurt, it just means I don’t feel like I can trust him with my feelings anymore if this is how he chooses to handle things when shit goes down.

I stand up and try to give them space. I need a minute to clear my head, and I don’t know if I’m quite ready to be in the same room as Damien.

“Are you mad at me?” I hear him whisper as I get to the door. I freeze and take a moment to think about my response because ‘mad’ doesn’t feel like the right word.

“I was never mad, D,” I say as I turn to him. He’s holding our girl so close, and she’s already asleep. She needed him. Hell, we all needed him.

“Then what were you?” he asks, hesitantly.

---