Page 102 of Mafie Trials

I go to my old room, crouch on the floor in the back of my closet, and hit the video call button. I’m in my workout clothes, dripping with sweat and when he answers, my eyes go wide seeing his face.

Fury and hatred mix together in my gut, but I’m careful not to let it show. Instead, I start talking fast, hoping like hell it’s enough to distract him from the fact that I’m lying through my teeth.

“I got some information. I had to tell you as soon as I could. This is huge.”

“Fuck yes,” he cheers and nausea rolls through me.

“Write this down, fast. I was able to run away for a few minutes, but they are always watching. I’ll call when I can, but you need to know that Boris just bought a new airport and he’s having construction done now. I heard him talking to Alexi on the phone this morning. He’s planning for it to be their main shipment port by mid-year. On opening day, while they work out the kinks in the flight path, every plane will be holding millions of dollars of drugs or goods that will be sent all over the world.”

“Holy shit, Little Warrior, they are letting you really close if you were able to hear all of that. Are you sure this isn’t a setup?”

His worried eyes meet mine, but I already expected this. I roll my eyes at him as if his idea was insane.

“I’m sleeping with him,” I tell him, shocking him a bit. “I was in the room when he got the call, and I faked being asleep to get all the information. He came on a run with me this morning, and I was only able to lose him for a moment to make this call.”

“I always knew you had it in you to do what needed to be done. Do you have any other information? An exact date?”

“No, all I know is that it should be in about five months. He talked about permits for something, but I didn’t understand that part, then he walked into the bathroom. I do know they need this. If this fails, theywillfall.”

I try to sound menacing by picturing my uncle falling to his knees in front of me after we kill all his most loyal men. I imagine my blade caressing his skin, then running the jagged end over his jugular. I think about his blood staining my hands while he looks at me with defeat in his eyes.

“Well done. I will get working on this. You’re doing great. I’m so proud of you and your strength. Are you feeling better after everything?”

He attempts to look like he cares, but I know he doesn’t. He does this thing with his fingers when he’s bored with someone. He runs his thumbnail under his index finger. I wonder if he’s always given me his tell so clearly and I just never wanted to see it.

“I’m good now, back in training and feeling stronger.” At least that’s the truth so it’s easy to say. “I’ve got to go. Talk soon.” I hang up before I ruin anything. It’s rare we ever end calls without saying I love you. I wonder if he even noticed.

I take a few shaky breaths, pacing the closet for a moment.

“Are you alright?” Lev asks from his spot on the floor. I needed him here, and he didn’t hesitate to come when I mentioned how much his presence helped me last time.

“No,” I admit openly. Dr. K tells me I need to be honest about my feelings, and even though it sucks to admit to him that just that short little call rattled me, it really fucking did.

I feel like an anxiety attack is already brewing beneath my skin. The adrenaline mixed with the nausea from talking to the man who ruined my life has me contemplating running to the bathroom and forcing myself to puke in search of some kind of release.

I take a deep breath and stop pacing.

“What do I do?” I ask in defeat. “How do I make it not feel like this? I don’t want to feel like this?”

Tears stream down my face. I wipe at them angrily.Why the fuck do I cry all the time now?I swear if Dr. K tells me it’s normal one more time, I might actually hurl my phone out into the damn ocean.

Instead of giving me answers to my problems, he pulls me out into my room and cuddles me on the bed. “You feel it, then you move past it. Stop trying to bury it, stop trying to hide from me, and just ride the wave, Lucky Charm. You are stronger than you think.”

I take deep breaths and force myself to deal with it while I’m in his arms. I’m not walking out of this room until I have. The bad things can happen in here, but out there I only want the good. My men, my friends, my family.My real family.

Once the panic has started to pass, I snuggle deeper into him, inhaling his scent. As long as I have him, as long as I have all of them, this is all going to be okay. We are going to win this.

We have to.

Chapter 40

I sit on my bed with anxiety coursing through my veins. I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to let him back in. But I have to.

Adrik: It’s now or never. Pick a side or I’ll make sure you lose everything.

I chew on the inside of my lip, knowing this can only end one way. Looking down at my phone I notice how my nail polish has chipped on the ends of my thumbs. I haven’t been a nail-biter since I was six or seven.

I school my features and take a deep breath. I got this.

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