Page 83 of Be My Sinner

“I loved him…so much.” Dinah’s arms wrap tightly around herself, as if she’s trying desperately to keep all her shattered pieces from bringing her down to her knees. My strong Nightstar, who has been dealt so much loss and hardship at the hands of the Order, but continues to push fiercely forward.

“He loved you so much, Atasi. Everything he was trying to do was for you, and your mom. He was always thinking about you.” Abraham’s voice breaks with the words, and it almost has me feeling compassion for him.

I can see from her expression that she believes Abraham’s words, and I’m also swayed. How could I not be if he loved Gabriel, ifthey loved Gabriel, even a fraction of the way I love my Nightstar?

I watch her pull herself together, her shoulders squaring as she wipes away the tears from her face. Her eyes meet mine, and I see the resolve in their depths. To keep going, to keep ridding the world of the Brotherhood members. This man will die for his actions, but I still have reservations about the timeline.

Zeke shifts forward as Dinah’s eyes center on him. There’s a fierce determination on his face, wrath making itself present on his features. “There’s something else you should know, Snow. He was in our wedding chamber. He was one of the men who watched.”

His words have the desired outcome he’s hoping for. Rage crosses Dinah’s face as her eyes widen and become stormy and dark. Her mouth settles in a hard line, and she begins to pace in front of the fireplace.

“What is the family name?” I demand.

“Saint Andrews,” Zeke replies, but never takes his eyes off of Dinah.

“Then they have to die.” Dinah stops moving, her gaze landing on mine, her expression imploring me to agree with her. Just like that, I know there will be no changing her mind. That he has picked the target that she could never walk away from. The temptation is too great to end someone like that, who has caused her family pain at every turn.

Fuck, I hope he isn’t betraying her. I hope his intention isn’t to serve her up on a platter to the Brotherhood. If it is, he better get himself right with his God because if anything happens to my Nightstar, I will kill him.

Chapter 41

The Forsaker

Zeke

IwatchDinahfrombehind my wine glass as my mother picks up the conversation, her self-important voice and air of grandeur, starting to really grate on my nerves. She seems to get worse with every visit, becoming increasingly entrenched in her belief that she’s better than everyone around her. I’ve never truly considered matricide before, but as I hold my sharp dinner knife in my left hand, I envision stabbing it into my mother’s throat and shutting her the hell up.

It doesn’t help her cause to dissuade me from my violent thoughts with how she has treated my wife since arriving. She all but sneered at her and tried to make my Snow feel self-conscious. Making snide comments about the fit of her dress and her gorgeous, unbound dark hair. Hair that I long to have my fingers entangled in as I fuck her hard and fast from behind.

My cock twitches in my lap as the image in my head changes, from my mother bleeding to death on her pristine white tablecloth, and all over her cherished fine china to my wife, sprawled out beneath me on this very table, my cock deep inside her pussy, her breasts swaying with the brutal impact of my thrusts, and Abraham’s cock down her throat, choking and muffling all her sounds. I wonder if she’ll be willing to let us both fuck her after we commit murder with her?

It hasn’t been easy staying away from her since having a taste of her sweet, tight cunt at my wedding, and that night with Sammy in her room almost two weeks ago. Her taste lingered in my mouth for days, driving me insane with the need for a repeat. Whenever I tried to approach her, however, she rebuked me immediately. The little unhinged psycho even slept with a large knife under her pillow at night, just waiting for me to make an attempt to fuck her into the mattress so she could slice my throat.

My eyes pull away from her form and make a sweep of the table. Abe’s busy ignoring everyone and shoving food into his mouth. If anyone hates being in his parents’ company more than me, it’s him. Then there’s my father and Peter, both patiently listening to my mother ramble on about this family and that one. I wonder if my father also dreams of stabbing her?I wouldn’t be surprised if he did.

My gaze lands on Sarah Mercier, and I find she’s watching me with a severe expression. What does she see when she looks at me, I wonder? Does she see the boy I once was, who loved the hot chocolate she used to make us when we had sleepovers at her house? Does she see the man I have become? The one who is possessive and in love with her son, or does she worry that I’ll be like my father, and use Dinah to climb the golden ladders of the Brotherhood seeking power?

Her eyes break from mine, and she turns to watch Dinah as she pushes the food around her plate with her fork. She’s barely eaten anything, and has kept unusually quiet throughout dinner. Are her thoughts all on what we will do later? Is my little serial killer sitting there fantasizing about murder?

My plan is to give her this kill; this gift is very important to me, because I need to win Dinah over. I need her to want me like she does Sammy, and be carefree with me like she is with Abe. Deep inside, I know I shouldn’t be jealous of either of them; after all, I am the one she’s married to. It’s my name that she carries, and it will be my children she bears first.

Still, it doesn’t stop the wound that constantly festers inside of me, the one filled with poison. The one that says I am less than. That I will never be good enough. Not for Dinah, my father, Abraham, or this bullshit world we live in.I wasn’t good enough for Gabe to survive for.There will always be something lacking in Ezekiel Rothesay, not quite enough for anyone.

I want Dinah to stop that wound from festering any deeper. I know she can change how I see myself with her affection and belief in me. I’m losing my humanity little by little until nothing will be left of me. When we were kids, her love and admiration were everything to me. My little Snow, perfect and gentle like a fairy tale princess. Always ready to soothe my aching soul with just one hug.I need that version of her back; I need my Snow.

“Ezekiel, are you listening, boy?” My father questions from the head of the table, and I have to shake myself out of my morose thoughts.

“He’s too busy enthralled by his lovely wife, isn’t that right, son?” Peter questions with a grin.

“My apologies, father. I tuned out when Mother started to describe what people were eating.” I feign a yawn, and Dinah kicks my shin from underneath the table, while trying to suppress a smile. I give her a wink and then focus back on my father.

Sammy catches my eye just over my father’s shoulder, as he stands guard with a blank expression. I know he doesn’t trust me. He doesn’t believe my affections for Dinah are true. He’s fucking wrong about me, and I look forward to proving it to him. She’s as much my priority as she is his. I may not have always shown it, and I hate myself for turning my back on her in the past, but I won’t let anything happen to her. I promised Gabriel that I would always protect her, and I have no intention of breaking that promise any longer.

She’s mine. I will never let anyone take her from me, not him, my father, or even death.

“I said that us men should retire to the study for after-dinner drinks, and to discuss business, and leave the women to their coffees and decadent desserts.” My father raises his eyebrow in question with displeasure across his features.

Really, when is he not aggrieved at my presence?The man really should have kept trying for the perfect son; unfortunately for him, that would have required him to keep fucking my mom. We all know he prefers to fuck other men’s wives rather than his own.

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