Page 62 of Be My Sinner

“What is he talking about, Sammy?” I rip my gaze away from the emerald one that is trying to consume me, and meet Sammy’s angry eyes. “You can’t trust a word that comes out of his traitorous mouth. He’s a snake. Tell me you didn’t make a deal with him! Tell me, Sammy!”

I catch Zeke’s body going ramrod straight from the corner of my eye, and his jaw tightens at my words. I bet you if he didn’t need something from me, and Sammy wasn’t in the room, he would try to take out that displeasure on me right now. A moment of insanity overcomes me because I know that I would not only welcome the violence, but chances are I would enjoy it.

I observe as he gives both of us a half-shrug, as if he isn’t concerned one way or the other with the outcome, but I know it’s all a facade. I can see it in the way he holds himself, the jut of his chin, the way his shoulders are tense, waiting for something to happen.What the hell is going on here?

“The‘prince’has found a way to keep you safe, Dinah. To keep both of us safe from the Brotherhood, and allow me to remain at your side.“ I start to protest, but he shushes me. “Please listen, Nightstar. We don’t have much time, and I need you to promise me you will do this for me, for us. I need you safe. Promise me?” His cold and clammy hand reaches up and circles my throat, his frigid fingers applying a small amount of pressure to guarantee my attention.

“No. Whatever he has promised you, he will never keep his word. Sammy, please, we have to figure a way out of here. We can’t depend on him to help us,” I beg, my anxiety rising with each of his words and terror stabbing at my heart. What has this prick promised him to make him believe he will protect us?

Sammy’s fingers tighten on my neck until I only get a small amount of air through. My eyes widen at the anguish on his chiseled face. His other hand grabs a fistful of my hair, yanking my head back sharply. The pain in my scalp, the tightness in my throat, and his intense gaze, have my nipples hardening and my core clenching. He’s so close to snapping I can feel it. Violence is begging to be unleashed from all of his pores. It’s a beacon calling to me in its depravity.

“If there was another way, Dinah, any other fucking way, you know I wouldn’t be asking this of you. There…isn’t, Nightstar. Please believe me. This is our best chance of staying alive. You will agree to his terms because I won’t lose you. I can’t.”

“Sa…mm…y.” My breath rasps with how hard he’s squeezing my neck. Real fear has taken hold of him and has him locked in its icy jaws. I need to get him to calm down. The desperation in his tone and his eyes are frightening me down to the soles of my feet.

He releases me suddenly, and I lose my balance, falling to my knees as I drag much-needed air into my lungs. I watch from my position on the floor as Sammy starts to pace restlessly. Ezekiel never takes his eyes off of me. “What have you done?” My voice sounds shrill to my ears as I embrace the panic surging through me.

“Whatever I need to do to keep you safe.” Ezekiel looks away, refusing to hold my gaze. No!Fuck, no. What have these two done?I feel a choked sob welling up within me, but I suppress it just as I push back the anxiety coursing through my body, setting my heart racing like a galloping racehorse.

“Nightstar, later tonight, you will marry Ezekiel,” Sammy declares, forcefully raising his hands to quell any potential objections, his fingers clenching into fists, knuckles white with tension, as if ready for a fight against dissenting forces.

“You will marry him, Dinah. It is the only way you and I both get to stay alive. It’s the only way we get to continue to be together.” His hands grip his long, dirty blond tresses and yank in exasperation.

“He has agreed to allow me to remain at your side, and you will continue to be mine, Nightstar, just with stipulations.” He turns his unforgiving glare on Ezekiel, and I watch from the corner of my eye as Zeke shrugs. “He has a way to keep the Brotherhood on the trail of the Unholy Ghost, and keep their suspicions firmly off of you, Dinah. I’m convinced this could work. If it doesn’t, I will tear his fucking heart out of his chest and feed it to his lover.”

“How...? How can this even work? I can’t marry him, Sammy. I won’t. How could you even suggest such a thing?” The words escape my lips in a feeble whisper, disbelief at Sammy’s request overwhelming me. I witness Sammy’s deep wince in response to my questions, his face reddening as he clenches his teeth, avoiding the words that would seal my fate.

The overwhelming surge of abandonment washes over me, leaving me questioning if he no longer desires me. How could he propose something as dreadful as marrying Ezekiel? There must be an alternative, a different path to survival. This can’t be the only option available to us.

A loud sigh leaves the other inhabitant of the room. “The Unholy Ghost will continue his reign of terror and kill more Brotherhood members, Dinah. You will be my wife, bound to me and my home. No suspicion will fall on you as a Sacred Wife. As a Rothesay.” Zeke’s eyes gleam at me from below his thick, dark lashes as he drags a hand roughly through his short coal-colored hair, the tattoos on his hands and fingers a stark relief against his golden skin.

“If I am bound to you and locked in your home, who will be out there killing Order members?” I demand, not understanding what the hell is going on here.

“You will, Nightstar. No one will know it’s you except us. Zeke and Abraham will be able to cover your tracks, and as a Sacred Wife, you’ll never be suspected. If the killings continue, you and I will be ruled out as possibilities if anyone suspects we were involved.”

A thrill races through me as my eyes move back and forth between them. I can keep killing members of the Brotherhood, and they’ll protect me. No Sacred Wife would be thought capable of such violence and atrocities. I would be above suspicion. I would be almost untouchable as a Rothesay. Sammy would be safe. All I have to do is marry Ezekiel and submit to him. I would have to surrender who I am and become a Sacred Wife, a pawn in the hands of men.

Those words race through my mind in a fearful, relentless loop, causing my stomach to coil tightly, and my ears to reverberate with dread. I’ll become everything I’ve fought so hard to resist. My destiny will slip from my grasp once more. I’ll be a captive in Ezekiel’s clutches, and Sammy will be his bargaining chip in this twisted game.

The first tear escapes from my eyes, tracing a solitary path down my face as I struggle against the impending flood of emotions. I would have to betray Sammy, betray all the years we have spent together. I’d be marrying a man I suspect had a hand in my brother’s death, in Gabriel’s demise upon this earth. How could I inflict such a betrayal upon my own flesh and blood? I clutch my arms around myself, fighting to ward off the overwhelming wave of misery and vulnerability engulfing my body.

A frigid tide of hopelessness engulfs me as I confront the bleakness of my circumstances. All of this could have been avoided if I had just allowed Sammy to cast Zeke over that cliff.Why did I stop him? Look at what has befallen us now. Fresh tears trace their path down my skin, and an anguished sob escapes my quivering lips.

Sammy falls to his knees before me, his hand reaching out to pull me into his body and his large arms wrapping me in their strength. “I love you, Nightstar. If there was any other way, I wouldn’t ask this of you.”

My forehead leans against his, and I watch as sad tears trail down his face to match mine. I can’t help but feel that this is the beginning of the end, for the life that I had with Sammy all these years. Nothing will ever be the same going forward. What we had will be tarnished beyond repair with what they are asking me to do.

He says he loves me; how could he ask this of me? Was it all a lie? After all these years together, he asks me to let another man come between us. Would it not have been preferable to die together? Would I have chosen the same outcome for him if the tables had been reversed?

I pull back from Sammy’s embrace, my eyes trailing over his, and then I meet Zeke’s. Do I detect remorse in those deep, smoldering green eyes? Does he understand that he will destroy what I have built for myself, who I am, with these actions?

All of the wrath that continuously lives within me ignites like a match. What does he get out of this? Does he think I’ll be like his mother or, worse, like mine? That I’ll allow myself to be used up and then discarded like a piece of tissue paper, all while he holds a blade over the head of the man I love.

My eyes narrow to daggers, ready and willing to demonstrate the violence that lives within the cage inside of me. How it longs to be set free and cause pain to Ezekiel Rothesay in this moment of weakness.

“You will belong to me, Snow. I will be your husband, but not only in name. I will have you in every way I desire. You are mine. You have always been mine.” Ezekiel takes a step forward and then another, silent, stealthy, a predator about to go in for the kill.

“You will one day carry my child inside of you, and because of this, I won’t take Sammy away from you. I don’t want to cause you more unnecessary pain. We will share you with him,” Zeke murmurs soothingly, his brow furrowing as he bites down on his lower lip.

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